Your story was really interesting. I noticed how you used the second person from the mentor texts. I also noticed how you didn't have a lot of dialogue. If you had more time, how would the story end.
Making the reader able to put themselves into the story is very creative. I think the best part about this story was the middle because I kept wanting to read more and it reminded me of fanfiction. The story itself was fun to read. Great work. I also love the title.
Making the reader able to put themselves into the story is very creative. I think the best part about this story was the middle because I kept wanting to read more and it reminded me of fanfiction. The story itself was fun to read. Great work. I also love the title.
I thought the second person was very well put into the story, the descriptions really has the reader feeling creepy reading it. the escalation is also very well done. you know somethings wrong from the start but as it gets worse and worse the story gets better and better
It was interesting that you decided to write the story in second person. It seemed like you were trying to make a story where at first nothing seemed wrong, and then the reader slowly realized something creepy was going on. You definitely succeeded! Maybe you could have had the best friend catch the main character.
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