A Change of Pace

I don't like bragging about myself. I'm really not that kind of person. But last Saturday in poetry workshop (here at SLA) our prompt was to write a poem full of hyperboles. And it was fun. I got to say crazy stuff like my voice stops a newborn's crying. And blow stuff out of proportion. Like people usually say I have a great smile but I said that it would make people run 10 miles just to get me what I want. I'm going to stop describing the poem now and just let you read it for yourself. Enjoy!

                                               Hyperbole Poem

 

 

I’m sorry to crush your dreams today

But I have to inform you

That you will never meet anybody more awesome than me

When you look up kind in the dictionary

My name will be its definition

I save people from burning buildings on a weekly basis

And the sound of my angelic voice silences a newborn’s crying

My voice is smooth and soft during conversation

But when I get up on stage

To recite a poem

The fiery string of words that spill out my mouth

Triggers the fire station’s alarm system

My laugh is literally infectious

There is no way around it

If I laugh you WILL be laughing with me

Most of the time at my own jokes

Because I’m just that funny

And please don’t get me started on my smile

The minute I fold my mouth up

Part my lips

And show the most glorious arrangement of teeth you’ve ever seen

You will run 10 miles

Just to get me what I want

And most of all my writing is fantastic

The spectacular way I string words together

Makes you believe anything I’m saying

And as you can tell from reading this right now

I’m pretty magnificent

And you will never ever meet anybody more awesome than me