Growing as a person

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Siani Davis

Personal Essay

Ms. Pahomov

December 22, 2016

I went through the beginning of my life not knowing who I wanted to be. I went through the beginning of my life accepting what was given to me. And because of this, I found myself not finding happiness. It took years for me to realize myself. And to become a better person overall. The choices I have made, to get me where I am today, I am very grateful for. I have learned so much, and have changed so much in a positive way.

I went to a school full of sameness. The dull green walls and brown floors were filled with people who were not like me. Infuriating loudness filled your ears before you could even reach the doors of the building. It was everywhere. They never seemed to stop talking. Every morning I’d walk into people just being loud, mouths extended to their fullest, blurting rowdiness. People will be sitting right in front of each other, inches apart, but for some reason be yelling. As if trying to compete with the rest of the noise the world itself produces. I hate it here. I do not belong here. I despised that when people get frustrated they deal with it with their fists; not thinking about consequences that could arise when they did these foolish things. I hated that school, a place where I was required to go to, felt unsafe. No place should never be that way. In my old school everyone was so overly judgemental. I felt that I was being squeezed into the person they wanted me to be. Peer pressure was common because of this. “C’mon Siani, just say one curse word!” the kids surrounding me pressured themselves to a closer proximity, “No. I really don’t want to. It’s wrong.”, “Just say bitch, just once!”, and then after years I said it. They wanted me to be rowdy, rude, and foul like them. They wanted me to make choices based on automatic impulse and instead of taking the time to sit back and think. I did not want to be that person. And I never will be.

The first day of ninth grade I arrived at a place of diversity in every aspect. I arrived at a place where I could be free; to have the freedom to embrace myself. And in my early life I did not think it was possible to discover and be apart of a place like this. In the past I was never able to voice my thoughts completely, in fear of judgement. But when I arrived here, it was a total different environment whereas it was okay to be whoever you wanted to be. Everyone was enforced to discover and embrace themselves. I am grateful that I had the opportunity to come to this school and be apart of this community for this reason. Me being here is such a pleasure. I have met someone I love dearly and great friends too. If I did not come here to meet people I have met, and learn the things I have learned, I do not know what type of person I would of become. I might not have liked that person at all. I have learned how to be a better person. Being kinder benefits everyone, including yourself. I have learned that working hard really pays off and that it is extremely important in succeeding in life. Coming to this school has really given me many opportunities to grow. For one, being that we are required to have an internship which is so unbelievably amazing. This allows you to investigate your passions further by getting real world experiences that can truly change your life. Having this opportunity sets you up in a good place when applying for colleges. Because of this, you can have the potential of being favored over another applicant when being viewed by colleges. Aside from the good educational aspects, the people that go to SLA are so strong willed and driven that it really makes you a better person. It is always important to surround yourself in a healthy and smart environment to go as a person positively.

Going to the middle school I went to, made me a stronger and smarter person entirely. It made me realize the type of people I did not want to be around and the type of person I did not want myself to be. It made me grow an urgency to get out of there. It made me work harder to be able to prove to everyone else that I could be in a better place and be a better person. I know that if I believe in myself, no matter how cheesy that is, I can get to the place I want to be. I can fight hard against the people that are trying to confine me in a tight area and get beyond that wall. I know that people can not control me, and that only I can control myself. SLA made me realize that there are truly valuable people out there. People that genuinely want to see you succeed and will even help you get there. At my middle school, I did not know anyone like this. But I knew that there was a place for me out there, so I reached to get there.