I noticed how some words were in bold and a different color from the rest. That made them really stand out and showed the reader that it was a big part. Is that how you wanted your story to end? I think it was good and I really like how the dialogue added to the story.
I loved reading all your horror scenes, it works really well for your writing style. The dialogue felt very natural and was enjoyable to read. While reading your story I found myself being hooked in. Good job.
While I wish the dialogue had been formatted for a short story, and not a play — the lines of dialogue themselves made me crack up, you do a great job of having horror and humor right alongside each other, "dude you bleeding everywhere" — you understand how to mix these genres. The challenge I think is writing a story where you can get to the end!
I noticed your use of different senses within your descriptions. I think adding time marks was a creative touch. Throughout the story, I was rooting for a sort of character development for Andres so he could take care of himself better but I think having a flawed main character is very necessary and realistic.
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