Mr. Jones

(The teacher walks in holding a briefcase) Good morning class. It is just a wonderful day to be here. (Rubbing his eyes) I hope you all had a lovely weekend. What are you doing Russell? Russell can you please put your phone away?  Today we are going to review genetics. (Goes to the board and begins to write.) Alright class, let’s begin with something easy.  If there are 9 genes that go into eye shape and 10 that go into eye color, how many genes affect your eyes genetic makeup? What do you mean 21? It is as simple as 9+10. Why are you all laughing?  Oh… it’s one of your internet jokes.

(Looking flustered) Let’s get serious, now that you all had that laugh.  So if the dominant trait is… What’s that sound?  Do I hear cell phone? Anyway, brown hair and the recessive trait is blond hair, and the person is heterozygous, will they have brown or blond hair?  Why are you all just giving me blank stares? (Begins to tap pencil against desk.) We have been over this ten thousand times.  Edward, what’s the answer? (pause for 5 seconds, begins to pace) Come on, don’t just give me “Ums” and “Uhhs.” Seriously, I don’t understand what is wrong with you all; we have been going over nothing but this for the last two weeks. 

Russell!  Hallway. Now.  (Walks quickly towards the hallway in an angry fashion) I’m so damn tired of your phone going off in class! If I catch you again, I’m taking your phone for the rest of the period and telling Principal Jenkins.  Now let’s get back into class.  We still have a large amount to cover.

Sorry about that class. So Jason, do you know if a person is heterozygous and has one allele for brown hair and one for blond if they will have brown or blond hair, assuming that brown is the dominant trait? (Pause 3 seconds, while teacher twists his hair)  Shnaw, what is shnaw?  Did any of your parents teach you how to speak even half way decent English?   

Well, if anybody is interested, the answer is brown.  Hey, I have got an idea; there is going to be is a test on this tomorrow.  Wow, it looks like everybody is listening now.  So now for the millionth time, if a person is heterozygous and they have one dominant and one recessive allele, then they will possess the dominant trait.  See class, it is not brain surgery.

Russell, that’s the last straw.  Give me your phone! I’m so so done.  I don’t get you kids these days, I have been doing this for 40 years and get no respect.  (Rate of pacing increases)  Your behavior today has been abominable!  All of you, just get out of my class.  I’m disgusted with your generation.  My shih tzu is smarter than this group. (Pauses long enough for children to exit class, while gnashing his teeth)  

I have always been the best. Kids have always been interested in my class.  I’ve been the funny teacher that is everybody’s favorite.  But now, I can’t keep up with iphones and Facebook.  It is all so much over my head.  I don’t know what to do anymore with these children. I really just don’t know anymore. (Begins to whimper) I try to keep up; I just can’t… (Walks towards desk and puts head down)

What grabbed you?

Declan: How well any student can relate to this essay and having their own experience with a teacher not knowing about any of the viral videos.

Luke: I think the humor and interaction of the scene kept me engaged and interested

What does there need to be more of?

Declan:Some more thoughts from the students

Luke: its short you can add like more examples and add more reflection and backstory for him

What confused you?

Declan: It was the last paragraph because he kind of ranted in a sad way about how he did not understand any of the internet fads.

Luke: why the kids left in the middle of class

What should I change?

Declan: I think you should change the last paragraph

Luke:I think its really good just drive your point about teachers trying but not keeping up home, maybe start some reflection earlier so it's not such a choppy transition.