Quarter 2 Benchmark (Memoir Vignette)

Room 436


This is benchmark 2 the memoir vignette, and this is actually my favorite. I actually got to pick what I wanted to write about and speak form my hard, instead of stating facts from books. This is a true and inspirational story.

I woke up again with a groan, not wanting to be bothered. Mom and her scratchy loud voice, you can hear her two blocks away. This short woman sure has pipes on her as I whispered while slowly crawling out of bed, man do my mouth taste disgusting (opener). I had knots and a bad feeling running in my body (foreshadowing). Time for another day at school, as my looney family bum rush down the stairs. When I stepped outside an instant wind blew threw my hair cheating for my brother, stopping me from running. My cheeks and ears stood still as I tried to beat the wimp. Mother comes screaming out the door as always, now for about five minutes we wait for my dad to wobble out it was a tradition. We waited the five minutes, then he came out different, he wasn’t walking normal, and all he kept doing was coughing but like a dog, bark bark barking all over (repetition and foreshadowing). The sound effect startled me; my mom wasn’t paying attention she was too busy talking about tonight. He slammed the door and waited for a minute to start the car. My mom noticed the bark and then she put on her wife voice the voice of a soft humming bird (metaphor). She said, “ Are you alright babe”? (Dialogue) while rubbing his back. Then she gave my dad two big fat thick white missiles that he had to shove down his throat. (Imagery and hyperbole) Ahhh, that soothing sound, finally I can hear the mean and grumpy engine start, its like music to my ears (personification).

            Sitting in class with screaming kids and annoyed teachers. I felt like I was in first grade, kids had baby stains all over there shirts. Girls rolling their eyes and popping there gum, but I was zoned out in another world. I was thinking about what my mom was talking about in the car this morning. I wasn’t paying attention I think she said something about meat loaf, I sure hope not. The time sure was moving sluggish, but when the bell screeched all you could hear were screams, lockers slam, and curse words in the thundering hallways (magic three). Then this loud mean munchkin hall motor screams down the hallways, “ GET YOUR DAMN STUFF, AND KEEP IT MOVING”(dialogue) She continues her rampage down the rest of the hallway. I walked out slowly, thinking I was catching the stinky cheese bus (Imagery). But surprisingly my aunt was there to pick me up, I got in the sparkling silver car, and I seen my wimpy brother, thinking to my self this was a lucky day for both of us. My aunt wouldn’t say anything the whole ride, her eyes had water sliding down them. It was like a water slide on her face (simile).  But then I noticed this wasn’t the normal way. Instead of taking the busy highways, we took the dirty and loud downtown streets. There was nothing but traffic and horns beeping. We showed up at the place where babies were born.

            The two sliding doors flew open, the lights were bright. People everywhere, I think to my self, it must be my baby cousin with the bad case of the runs, I call him Poo Poo Kazoo (humor). Sounds coming from everywhere coughs, sneezes, ambulances, and babies crying (Imagery-sound). The smell was awful; it smelt like vomit, cafeteria food, and sick people (Imagery-smell). I stayed close to my aunt and my brother stayed close to me, we were walking like we were in a scary movie about to get murdered (simile). My aunt asked “Where is room 436?’ to a man that look like cookie monster, he had on a bright blue uniform on with a badge that said front desk security (simile). The guy said 4th floor then a left, we got on the elevator and went up which seemed like forever. Finally the fourth floor, we went down this long hallway, the light got dimmer and dimmer. Then there was the room, room 436, the numbers made me nauseous and nervous. I was scared, there were old mean with there hairy, wrinkly butts dangling out the back of dotted pajamas which looked like sheets (humor).

            The door too room 436 was cracked, we walked into the dark room with a Television playing, and the news was on at a very low volume. Then they slid back the blank white curtains it was my dad. The horror in my eyes, they burned before the lava fell from them (metaphor). My mother sitting there, with a pale sick look on her face. She didn’t even say hi babies, like everyday when we come from school. I study my father like I had a test the next morning on a big black man in a bed (simile). He had snakes shooting venom in his arms. Something breathing for him, and one half of his body moving and the other half practically dead (metaphor). As I stood back for a while, I felt like a sponge I was absorbing all that just happened (simile). But I got the courage to walk, to the man I didn’t even notice. I slowly grabbed his hand; my hand was shaking it never done that before. His hand was rough and fragile, his eyes popped open, I whispered “dad why did you have a stroke”? God chose you why were you bad to him (dialogue). A gentle tear trickled down my face as I said “I would do anything you ask, are you in here because I spilled all of your cologne”(dialogue). He grabbed my hand tight, tight enough to lose circulation and chuckled. He kissed me and said, “I love you young lady, and no matter what happens life changes. “(Dialogue) That was the first day I ever heard my dad call me young lady, that day I grew up in that hospital, knowing that life will throw obstacles in your way. But when it happens you have to be prepared. I whispered “I love you too dad”(dialogue), and let go of the sand paper hand (imagery and metaphor) and then I left the room 436.