This essay reflects a moment on page 123, within Part 1 of the novel. Section pages 112-124.

The novel “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” by Ken Kesey, is narrated by a mentally ill patient, within a mental ward as the main setting. This secluded environment in which Kesey places the reader is heavily biased and warped by the main character, Chief Bromden’s skewed views and delusions of the world. He has various hallucinations and trauma from serving in the Army. He is consistently dosed with various drugs—which do not help his traumatic and odd hallucinations—all of these which further warp the reader’s knowledge and view of the novel since it is written through this seemingly delusional narrator.

Ken Kesey forces the reader to think about their relationship to their perception and delusion through this incredibly nuanced narration and setting of the novel. Most of Bromden’s hallucinations and narration have administered a consistent theme throughout the novel of connecting everything he perceives to “machinery.” (pg. 33) Within this theme of machinery, Bromden speculates that wires are controlling him and everything around him. He narrates the story as if he does not have a will of his own. With this notion at the center of attention now, I would like to take a look at a scene where this idea is presented in a way that changes the entire story thereafter: a scene where Bromden exposes himself as a patient who is not deaf. On page 123, Bromden has an inner dialogue about raising his hand in favor of a vote—the action that exposes him as an auditory person—and how it was not him who raised his hand. “McMurphy’s got hidden wires hooked to it, [his arm] lifting it slow,” following this, Bromden continues to think, “He’s doing it, wires….” illustrating how he does not have a will of his own. The reader, using rationality, knows this is not physically possible. More notably, after Bromden narrates a paragraph about his lack of control, and how he “can’t stop” his hand from moving, he prominently states to himself in triumph: “No, That’s not the truth. I lifted it myself.” (both quotes are seen on page 123) This moment is pivotal to the novel Kesey has written. Not only does it chart the course for rebellion within the storyline, but it also brings the reader to doubt everything that Bromden has described prior to this moment. The mere mention of his loss of control over his actions or inactions within the illusionary setting of the novel brings the reader to ponder their relationship with delusion and perception.

In particular, I found this moment in the story incredibly eye-opening. So much so, I will use it as a springboard to speak about the landscape of my own mind; and how my understanding of delusion, perception, and societal pressure evolved.

Reflecting on Bromdens hallucinations and struggle with control over himself, I could not help but be reminded of societal pressure which is even more accentuated today than ever before thanks to social media. Due to technological advancements, nearly everything that is intellectual or non-physical—like emotion—has been inflated with far more importance placed on it than in past times. Much like Bromden’s hallucinations with wires and machinery controlling him, I now reflect on how this once laughable delusion has become a reality. Ken Kesey just opened my eyes from the 1960s.

Sophia Washington made an astute observation about the controlling and bland environment of the Ward stating, “It’s like a brainwashing system,” in a recent Fishbowl discussion. Yet, although she was speaking about the constant playing of the same music in the Ward—which led to patients not realizing music was even playing after a while—I cannot help but find this statement more directly relates to our real world. Much like Bromden’s belief in “machinery” controlling his actions, societal norms can be interpreted as this constant buzzing of music mentioned in Sophia’s observation. Societal norms and expectations can create an invisible web that influences decisions and self-perception. For example, there have been times in my life when I felt compelled to conform to societal standards and expectations, even when they conflicted with my true self. When I was a kindergartener first learning to write, I found it much more comfortable to write with my left hand, unlike many other peers who were right-hand dominant. Due to increasing social pressure from my peers, I gave into the societal norms around me and never used my left hand again. My thoughts were filled with negative connotations about writing with my left hand. After reading this scene, I was led to recognize these external influences and assess how they affect my thoughts and actions moving forward.

This moment has encouraged and enriched me to be more mindful of the “wires” that reach out to pressure and control me and other people. Whether they stem from cultural norms, peer pressure, or media portrayals, Ken Kesey has instilled in me, much like many others, to strive to be more authentic. To not be controlled by “machines.”

“i’d find you” by phendste https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERlJjq6cyzA

This song by Phendste resonates with the longing and resilience found in The Handmaid’s Tale, as Offred has a tendency to cling to the hope that she might be reunited with her husband, Luke. The lyrics within the song, “So hold on, don’t you dare lose hope, I will find you” mirror Offred’s desire for a future beyond Gilead, where Luke might still be searching for her, keeping her hope alive. Offred’s wish to “have Luke here… so I could have a fight with him” on page 200 reflects this yearning for even the simplest connection to her old life. Emphasizing even small acts of intimacy like arguing are luxuries in her isolated world. Similarly, the lyric “Oh guard your heart for me baby” speaks to a need for emotional protection; something Offred must do to survive under the constant surveillance and oppression of the regime of Gilead. This song echoes Offred’s silent determination, desperate yearning for her old life, and love for her former partner, Luke.

“Solitude” by Billie Holiday
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiU-O8arVa8

Billie Holiday’s “Solitude” fully shows the despair and isolation Offred experiences in The Handmaid’s Tale. The lyric “I sit in my chair, filled with despair… with gloom everywhere” reflects Offred’s daily experiences, and existence, seeing as she spends hours sitting in her room with little to do but contemplate her fate in Gilead. The line “In my solitude, I’m praying” in the song suggests a sense of forced faith when aligned with Offred, in Gilead, since as far as the reader is aware, Offred was not mentioned to be affiliated with any religion prior to her indoctrination as a Handmaid. This indoctrination reflects her limited choices for solace, and solitude in a world where she feels “buried” (page 211) and confined. Continuing this sense of isolation, on page 199 Offred notes how “this isn’t a jail sentence” because there is “no time to be done and finished.” Overall, this song reflects the sinister reality Offred experiences in each and every day, living in Gilead.

“Devil In A New Dress” by Kanye West https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sk3rpYkiHe8

Kanye West’s “Devil In A New Dress” exposes the hypocrisy and moral decay within Gilead rulers/ruling class. The line “We ain’t married but tonight I need some consummation” echoes through the commanders’ disregard for their own laws, illustrated during the club scene where the indulge in, well, illicit activities. This reflects the hidden depravity within Gilead, as they exploit women while enforcing strict morality elsewhere. The lyric “What happen to religion? Oh, she lose it” looks back to the indoctrination piece mentioned earlier, and aligns with the superficial religiousness of Gilead, where religion seems to be but a tool used to control the masses. Offred’s contemplation, “I avoid looking down at my body… because I don’t want to see it” (page 63), shows how Gilead has stripped Offred of her autonomy, reducing her identity to her body’s utility. Overall, her desire to resist her fate in any manner reflects a silent rebellion against the Commanders’ hypocrisy, who secretly (although now known) breaks their own rules while she is forced to comply.

“America’s Most Blunted” by Madvillain https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jytxkJUM_7U

Madvillain’s “America’s Most Blunted” reflects a state of escape and numbness that resonates with Offred’s struggle for peace. The line “And they wondered how he dealt with stress so well, Wild guess? You could say he stayed sedated” parallels Offred’s attempts to numb herself in Gilead. In her limited, bland world, she treasures the night as “my own time, to do with as I will, as long as I am quiet” (page 52), using the nighttime as a means to detach from the world, similar to a cannabis user. When she acknowledges how every “thought must be rationed” (page 116), she reflects her very calculated effort to stay emotionally sedated, as thinking, or overthinking could lead to an immeasurable amount of despair. Following this line of thought about sedation: during a scene with Serena Joy, Offred is given a cigarette (page 206), which seems to be a calculated move from Serena Joy: to sedate, and calm Offred.

“Creative Control” O.C. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXSlKDIl7Ss

O.C.’s “Creative Control” captures themes of individuality and autonomy, which are not present throughout The Handmaid’s Tale—except for one person. Moira. Her rebellious spirit echoes through the line “stop, look and heed, participate in the re-organizing” knowing she was attempting to dismantle Gilead’s oppressive structure, refusing to conform to the societal category and obligations forced upon her. The declaration from the Angels that she was “too dangerous to be allowed the privilege of returning to the Red Center” (p. 249) exemplifies her refusal to “give in, go along, save her skin.” (page 249) like Offred says she has, much like many others. Just as the song speaks to claiming agency, and your creativity, Moira’s defiance is a stand for creative control over her own identity, in stark contrast to Offred, who admits one page 84, “I can’t remember what my real name is.” The lyrics of this song reflect a desire for self-determination, and Moira’s audacity makes her a powerful figure of resistance to the regime in Gilead; even within the constraints of Gilead, some individuals are able to reclaim their sense of self.

Throughout reading The Handmaid’s Tale, written by Maragaret Atwood, I have not been able to shake an immense feeling of discomfort. This new, and belligerent feeling was not based upon the many uncomfortable sex scenes, or any sort of generic ideas that would make a teenager squirm in their chair, snickering to their friends. Instead - I have found the source of immense discomfort to be from each scene—or even sentence—holding a strong similarity to real life. On the surface, when I first began to read this novel I alienated myself from the ideas Atwood brought to the surface of my brain. A world structured around increasing birthrates—without money, even—was shocking to read about. Merely grasping the general trope of the story was a feat in itself. It seemed unidentifiable when compared to the life I have experienced; until after some clos(er) reading, that is. Looking back to the notion of discomfort which stems from the similarity to real life, there are scenes throughout the novel, but more importantly this selection of chapters, which resonate with this idea. Which especially resonate with me, as well. At first, ideas such as a world functioning around birthrates, and an ‘America’ without monetary value seemed impossible. In my experience, that was one of the defining points of the country I lived in. An America which was not driven by capitalism? Impossible. An America which encourages people to have more children through dehumanizing them, creating people such as handmaids? Impossible. Yet—as I had begun reading through chapters twenty-one, to twenty-six, I have only begun to see more and more similarities between Atwood’s novel, and our world. From my experience, the dehumanization of people seen within the novel, I can now see within the ‘villains’ of America: pro-life believers. Although not nearly as intense, after making the distinct yet obvious connection, the story slowly left an imprint on my view of real life. It made me deeply uncomfortable. During a scene where the reader experiences Gilead’s “birthing ritual” there is a striking similarity seen. On page 126, “We hold our breath as Aunt Elizabeth inspect it: a girl, poor thing.” Although as seen throughout the entire story, this reminded me of countries like China, where they banned having over one child, which is what made every family desire a boy. While today’s society seems more liberating than Gilead, there are moments when I feel like we are not that far off from a variation of Gilead. I’ve noticed that while reading through this book how much emotion seems to be narrowed down, and stifled. Through reading chapters 21–26, one quote especially resonated with me. “They get sick a lot, these Wives of the Commanders. It adds interest to their lives.” Seen on the bottom of page 154 this quote profoundly shows this notion. Living such a seemingly pointless, repetitive, and mundane life, the Wives within this story must feel quite numb. Something that I love to think about is the notion that emotions are only felt when they are accelerating, or decelerating. This novel, however, seems to completely stagnate the world, careful to not leave room for emotion to flow, and move people—much like a current while out at sea. Seemingly, the wind has disappeared in this setting.
My classmate, Lyev, had an insight especially about this specific scene. “She emphasizes art. Art is the opposite of boredom, right?” Nearly perfectly connecting to this notion of a numb world - Lyev made a brilliant connection between art, and the absence of feeling. Living a repetitive life, without any reason, numbs people, from my experience as a high school student. If I were to wake up and go to school everyday without a goal of some sort, I am sure that I would feel like a Wife from Gilead. Speaking to the mundanity of the Wives life, page 154 continuously aligns perfectly. “…knitting away at her [the wife] endless Angels scarves.” Angels are presumably babies. Seeing as they are endless, it only speaks more to the pointlessness of their way of life. Making scarves for babies, in a world which lacks a notable amount of them, can be interpreted to support Lyev’s point about art. In a world like Gilead, where creativity, autonomy, and overall freedom are completely thrown out of the window, art becomes not just a form of creative expression, but a need. A need for emotional survival; in order for Wives, Handmaids, or anyone within this treacherous novel to keep their sense of self. In this case, Wives knit not for babies’ needs, but their own. For, it is one of the few freedoms which they have. Lyev’s observation, tailored with this portion of the novel, made me think about how we, in our society, also turn to art, music, etc. to break free from our daily lives. From a teenagers’ perspective, this can be seen from the mountains of the playlist which, frankly, we all have, and listen to more than the sound of our own breathing. Especially social media, as well. Much like Offred’s small acts of rebellion seen which seem to keep her sane, art does the same for us. For me. Ultimately, The Handmaid’s Tale seems less & less of a cautionary tale about a distant, and impossible future, and much more like a twisted, and entirely possible version of our world, and reality. This is what makes the novel so unsettling to read: it is essentially a world which feels far away, yet disgustingly similar. It shows a ‘gray area’ of the world which we all know about, yet refuse to look towards.

How would society change if emotions were stripped from humanity?

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1uq3M9UEzsUy3qWvfwrGk01JNOIoxv3BM/view?usp=sharing