Family at its Finest

Eli Zimmerman Miss. Pahomov English 2 29, September 2016

Just to set the record straight: I love my grandparents, as well as my aunt and uncle. However, every three months or so my parents and I travel down to Virginia to see my family, every time I go I’m terrified. It’s just what they think to be normal is completely different from my variation of normal. Both my fathers grandparents come from a Catholic and Republican family. I am Atheist and have what I believe to be left wing points of view. My Aunt Val and Uncle Bryce do not care about politics at all, because they believe each side has a major flaw that deters them from either party. Nonetheless, they still have a very country suburban lifestyle which at time can be intimidating.

My first time going to Virginia I was 10 and out of all the trips we have made down there, this one was by far the worst. I remember getting in the car, ready to drive down to see my uncle for the first time in a couple years. I had no idea what to expect, I was nervous, anxious and excited. So my family made the three hour drive down to Purcellville, Virginia, a suburb of Washington D.C. My uncle lives in an old country style log cabin that is 4 stories with old windows. To get to the house, you have to drive down a gravel road. At this time my grandfather and grandmother had retired, so Bryce had offered up his guest house to them as a permanent residence. I remember pulling up to the house and being astonished by how nice his property was. In total there are two houses, a 4 car garage, a loft above the garage, and a swimming pool. All of this is on nearly 8 acres of land.

As we arrived in our Volvo station wagon I noticed Bryce, Val and my grandparents were all out in the driveway waiting for us. My Uncle Bryce is 6’3 stocky man with a grey goatee that matches his somewhat long hair. My aunt Val is short, about 5’5 and has blonde short hair. I remember getting out of the car and giving my uncle a handshake, I was astonished by the sheer size of his hands in proportion to mine. Bryce can be a very intimidating man when you first meet him because he’s a technical thinker, this means he does not always take into mind the feelings of the person to whom he is conversing with. So he began asking me questions I did not know the answer to, which embarrassed me infront of the whole family.

After his bombardment of questions I went over to hug my grandparents, they lived in Florida prior to the move to Purcellville so I rarely ever saw them. My grandma and grandpa both have an old fashioned parenting style so I had to go out of my way to be super precatious around them, especially when it came to my vulgar sense of vocabulary. I remember after all the hugs and hellos we all went into the house to eat an early 4 o’clock dinner. Once we all sat down my grandfather asked me to say grace and I quickly became terrified, I had never said grace before. After a couple moments of silence my grandfather breaking the quiet by beginning his prayer. After we began serving my grandma scolded my granddad for asking me to say that. I felt so bad at the time, I felt as if I was letting my family down by not knowing how to say christian prayer at the dinner table which scares me now to think about today. How could I have been expected to know how to say grace when I had never been exposed to christianity. Bryce told me later on in the stay my grandfather had done the same exact thing to his kids and it was no big deal. It felt as if my grandad was expecting all kids in our family to know about christianity and a god. By the end of the trip I felt as if I didn’t belong to my family solely based on the fact I didn’t know how to say grace. I will never forget this event because it reminded me how different I am from my family but in reality I am proud of my independence because that’s what makes who I am.

Comments (4)

Colin Taylor-McGrane (Student 2019)
Colin Taylor-McGrane

After reading this essay, I am thinking about how little things, like not knowing how to say grace can have a big impact on how ten year olds view themselves in the family. After reading this essay, I understand that it can be awkward when your family members have different beliefs than you. I liked how you spent a lot of time describing the setting and your family members.

Colin Taylor-McGrane (Student 2019)
Colin Taylor-McGrane

After reading this essay, I am thinking about how little things, like not knowing how to say grace can have a big impact on how ten year olds view themselves in the family. After reading this essay, I understand that it can be awkward when your family members have different beliefs than you. I liked how you spent a lot of time describing the setting and your family members.

William Huang (Student 2019)
William Huang

Hi Eli, I really enjoyed your essay about your experiences with meeting your family. It really can be frightening to meet people who have expectations for you that you aren't sure of. I don't have any family that live towards the South, as most of them live in China. I am Atheist myself, and I think it would be really awkward for me to fit into a Buddhist family, if I ever get the chance to go back again. As for your writing, I like the organization of the text. The chronological order was neat and easy to follow. I thought it was nice that you mentioned your thoughts and feelings throughout the essay. I really helped me empathize with your situation. You mentioned that you and your family go down to Virginia every 3 months or so. Is that still true? Are you more comfortable with your family now? I'm curious.

David Roberts (Student 2019)
David Roberts

I enjoyed learning a little bit more about you, Eli. This story was very descriptive and I enjoyed all the details. I like how you are not ashamed but proud to be independent and different. What made the difference though? What made you this way?