Keystone Pipeline Monologues

  In World History, we have been learning about the Keystone xL pipeline and how it affects citizens of the US, the world and the environment. The keystone pipeline is a pipeline that the United States wants to run from the tarsands that are located in Canada, to the oil reserves in Texas. Many who are in favor of the pipeline believe it is a resource that supplies cheap energy. The people who are not in favor of the pipeline believe the long term affects that will take place on our ecosystem do more damage than good. I have written 3 monologues about the Keystone Pipeline and created 3 different personalities on how the pipeline affects them. 

Monologue #1  "I know what I know and what I know is true"
(This monologue is about a southern father who gets a call from his son, the conversation begins to become an argument about if the pipeline is a good idea.)

(picks up cell phone)

Ello...

Well howdy son! how’s college?

good, good... better be good, all dat money I’m spending on yous

Where am I?  (sarcastically, surprised)


I’m in the ol’e shack? (laughs) The kitchen, you know what I mean.

you doing a what?

a surrr-vayy?

well son, sorry to dissapoint you but i do not know what a surrr-vayy is.

its a who?

oh i know, one of dem questionnaire thing-a-ma-bobers

yeah I heard about the Keystone xL, the greatest thing to come to america since the last four years.

What?

son please repeat, you know I’m hard of hearing. For a second I thought you said you were against the pipeline. The american dream!

You are?!

Well son, you may be in a fancy college but let me educate you on this here project. The pipeline will create millions of american jobs, you know old Uncle Stewie will be getting a job, high payin too, if this pipeline goes through

ain’t no such thing as pollution

Are you against the american dream son? you know that if we pass this herrrr pipeline then we won’t have to rely on them god-forsaken foreigners. They don’t like americans why keep paying them then. let em die!

No, I am not being bias, I know what I know and what I know is true_

So what do you think?

Pueweyy! Bologna! SHI-!

I didn’t curse... (talks under his breath) little bastard

Son this pipeline will supply us cheap abundant and reliable energy.... This is why Romney know what’s best son.

No I am not just repeating the polo-tichians. I know what that means...

No Romney??? (puzzled face)

OBAMA?! (bangs fist on table) Obamaaaaaaaaa, is against the U.S. of A. He’s a muslim and secretly is building up the muslim brotherhood in the middle east within america! A muslim! A terrorist!  how un american!!! He hates white people... (son hangs up the phone). Hello.. son? SON?! GOD-DAYUM THE LITTLE TURD! CHELLY! THE LITTLE TURD HUNG UP ON ME!

YEAH HE DID! THE LITTLE TURD! CAN YOU HEAT ME UP SOME OF DEM CHIDDLINS?

YEAHHH I’LL BE DOWN IN A SECOND!


Monologue #2. "WWTPD" (what would the president do?)
(the president ask his advisor about the pipeline. When informed he has to make a tough decision to please both pro and anti pipeline citizens.)

(picks up phone)
Hello, chief advisor Carl

Yes, please keep me (uhhhhh) up to date on the (uhhhh)  ramifications that the keystone pipeline presents.

Hmmm, lets start with the (uhh) good things shall we

Please say again. It provides what...?

Oh, excuse me, US jobs, yes I understand.

How many jobs are we talking about

Millions (says surprised). I see. Anything else that I should know? Tell me how cost efficient it is.

The tar sands would provide cheap, abundant, reliable energy you say? huh? (uh) Soooo (uhhh) so far passing the pipeline seems like a no brainer. Wouldn’t you say?

No? well why in the world wouldn’t you?

Okay I’m listening

Look at from an environmental standpoint, you say. Tell me how the process of using this energy efficient material harms the American soil.

It will damage the climate. How so?

Increases greenhouse gas emissions... thats no good. We need to keep the environment safe. That is a top priority.

Well thats all I need sir, thank you for your time.
(hangs up phone)
(Thinks to himself)

Well what should I do?
(puts feet up on desk and hand on chin and takes deep breath)

(Thinks to himself)
If I approve this, the activist will hate me and I won’t win the next term
But if I don’t then the jobless will accuse me of being anti-american and i would still not win the next term
Think Barack. You are the president!
Ha, (puts finger in the air) maybe if I allow building and gathering of the tar sands without fully approving the whole thing, then everyone will be happy.

(picks up phone and dials numbers)
Hello, secretary Katie Johnson.  Allow building of the pipeline in Texas but do not allow the whole thing to be built across the nation. No questions asked.

Yes that is all.


Monologue #3 "I can't believe you Ron"
(two men are in debate on how effective approving the pipeline would be.)

(on office phone)
My wife is good, how about yours?

good good good... so lets get down to business. So what do you think about the pipeline?

Please tell me you are not serious...

GOD RON! HOW CAN YOU BE SO IGNORANT?! (throws hands in air in disgust)

RON STOP ALLOWING YOURSELF TO BE SO BLIND!

WHAT! (throws hands up in the air in disgust) THOSE ARE LIES!

(stands up and begins walking nonchalantly around cubical)

mmmmhmmm yeah, right but.... but... but... LISTEN! you make valid points but what about the earth?
3
(comically mimicks ron)
What do you mean, what do you mean? Listen to the words coming (pause) out (pause) of (pause) my (pause) mouth! THE ENVIRONMENT!  the…. NO DON’T CUT ME OFF YOU LISTEN! what about our future? our kids future? and their kids?

WE DON’T WORRY ABOUT THE LATER JUST THE NOW?

so ignorant! i can barely talk to you!

So what you’re saying is.....

I’m sorry you’re right, I won’t cut you off

Do I understand? (says sarcastically).   I understand that yes jobs now are necessary. I also understand that your one tracked mind is clouding you from seeing the full picture RON.

(says in high voice) You want me to shed some light on the full picture for ya?

Okay first of all pollution in the air is already bad... (rolls eyes, starts making chatting motion with hands)

No duh not  as bad as China’s but....

ARE YOU GOING TO LET ME TALK!

Thank you, now as I was saying.... this project will pollute the air, do we want it to get as bad as china’s, no we don’t so why make steps toward that?

Okay so we agree on something... Also It will not create as many jobs as they are advertising. We would be destroying people’s home and ruining american lives. Is the enrichment of one life worth the destruction of another?

JOBS IS YOUR ONLY ARGUMENT.

SO WHAT ELSE THEN? WHAT ABOUT THE OIL SPILLS?

pipes are effective but not full proof. what else?

THOUGHT SO... GOOD DAY TO YOU SIR. (rudely, abruptly hangs up phone)


Appendix/Bibliography

1) "We will rely on allies instead of foreign countries" (video in class)

2) "Domestic oil prices will increase" (Fox News)
"Six Reasons Keystone XL Was a Bad Deal All along." Fox News. FOX News Network, 18 Jan. 2012. Web. 17 Oct. 2012. <http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/01/18/six-reasons-keystone-xl-was-bad-deal-all-along/>.

3) "Oil extraction from the tar sands emits three times more carbon waste than conventional oil extraction" (Friends of the Earth: Tar Sands)


4) "It will not be a major job producer" (Care 2)
"The Global Warming Cause." 5 Reasons Keystone XL Pipeline Is a Bad Idea. N.p., n.d. Web. 9 Oct. 2012. <http://www.care2.com/causes/5-reasons-keystone-xl-pipeline-is-a-bad-idea.html?page=2>.

5) "Local economies within the route will benefit from increases in tax revenues and business activity" (TransCanada) 
"TransCanada Corporation Home." TransCanada Corporation Home. N.p., n.d. Web. 17 Oct. 2012. <http://www.transcanada.com/>.

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