Language Autobiography
My father was the general manager of a chain of prestigious printing companies. He was a man of power. Many of his colleagues and people in a higher position than his were of Caucasian descent. I have many memories of my brothers and I being in the car with my father and listening to him answer his cell phone. We noticed his voice would immediately change to sound like a voice I associate with a white person.
“Hey Jerry, it’s Myron here. I called you to see if you received my email about the finances of the store up in Lancaster. I’d like to hear back from you as soon as possible because I’m not really sure what your guys are doing. I’m going up to the store right now to check on what’s going on.”
We would always laugh at our dad’s “white voice”, mainly because it seemed to have a higher pitched, more nasally quality to it. But I believe since we were around him so much while he was speaking with perfect English diction, my brothers and I also picked up on this way of speaking.
Numerous times I have been told “You talk white.” This statement was always said by a fellow African American in a brutal, disgusted fashion. My answer would always be “This is just the way I talk, I’m not trying to sound white.” It has always puzzled me that I am ridiculed for speaking in a manner that that doesn’t relate to my ethnical appearance . I see it as some people of African descent who encounter me feel a level of discomfort or intimidation when I speak. But, this is not the message I am trying to convey. It is simply my natural diction. But it goes to show how powerful language can be.
The school I attended for most of elementary and middle school was an Afrocentric school, and they used reverse racism against white people to uplift the African race. Though they denied this claim, every student knew it was true. Most of the moments when I felt guilty for being partially white happened while I attended that school. I very vividly remember in the third grade while I was having free time during gym, one of my classmates came up to me and asked “Are you Caucasian?” Being so young and clueless, I didn’t even know what Caucasian was. I asked her “What’s that?” and she responded “White.” I wasn’t entirely sure of my ethnicity so I told her “I think, on my dad’s side.” He was so light, so I assumed. Finally I asked “Why?” “You talk white.” There was so much venom in her tone. In that moment I realized, I was a possibly mixed kid in a black power school. I felt weird and out of place.v
Through language, you can articulate the thought patterns of your mind into something comprehensible to others. If your knowledge of language is limited, then it is viewed that your thoughts can only be so brilliant because there is no way to relay your message to others. This means that language equals power. The stronger your words, the more respect you will receive. Words are often used to offend. My experiences with conflict involving language had nothing to do with direct threat, but the enormity of my vocabulary offended those who did not possess the same amount as me.
With my father, he was required to show the extent of his knowledge of the English language when in his professional setting, but I have also heard himself “dumb it down” for his companions and allies.
“Wassup man it’s Speed I just left the crib I’m bouta swing down my mom’s house and pick her up a few things then I’m gonna shoot over to Man’s house and just chill there for a while.”
To master language, you must understand its levels. To convey your message, you must consider your surroundings and adapt. I don’t believe this is at all “Selling out” or “Being fake”. But rather, being understood. That is the sole purpose of language. To intertwine the thoughts of your mind with others’ thoughts.
Throughout my life I will continue to try my best to explain what I am feeling through language in hope that my words will fall in relation with whoever chooses to internalize what I say. As said in Mother Tongue by Amy Tan,
“I spend a great deal of my time thinking about the power of language -- the way it can evoke an emotion, a visual image, a complex idea, or a simple truth.”
Language is a power that everyone can possess, in one form or another. I choose to take full advantage of this power.
“Hey Jerry, it’s Myron here. I called you to see if you received my email about the finances of the store up in Lancaster. I’d like to hear back from you as soon as possible because I’m not really sure what your guys are doing. I’m going up to the store right now to check on what’s going on.”
We would always laugh at our dad’s “white voice”, mainly because it seemed to have a higher pitched, more nasally quality to it. But I believe since we were around him so much while he was speaking with perfect English diction, my brothers and I also picked up on this way of speaking.
Numerous times I have been told “You talk white.” This statement was always said by a fellow African American in a brutal, disgusted fashion. My answer would always be “This is just the way I talk, I’m not trying to sound white.” It has always puzzled me that I am ridiculed for speaking in a manner that that doesn’t relate to my ethnical appearance . I see it as some people of African descent who encounter me feel a level of discomfort or intimidation when I speak. But, this is not the message I am trying to convey. It is simply my natural diction. But it goes to show how powerful language can be.
The school I attended for most of elementary and middle school was an Afrocentric school, and they used reverse racism against white people to uplift the African race. Though they denied this claim, every student knew it was true. Most of the moments when I felt guilty for being partially white happened while I attended that school. I very vividly remember in the third grade while I was having free time during gym, one of my classmates came up to me and asked “Are you Caucasian?” Being so young and clueless, I didn’t even know what Caucasian was. I asked her “What’s that?” and she responded “White.” I wasn’t entirely sure of my ethnicity so I told her “I think, on my dad’s side.” He was so light, so I assumed. Finally I asked “Why?” “You talk white.” There was so much venom in her tone. In that moment I realized, I was a possibly mixed kid in a black power school. I felt weird and out of place.v
Through language, you can articulate the thought patterns of your mind into something comprehensible to others. If your knowledge of language is limited, then it is viewed that your thoughts can only be so brilliant because there is no way to relay your message to others. This means that language equals power. The stronger your words, the more respect you will receive. Words are often used to offend. My experiences with conflict involving language had nothing to do with direct threat, but the enormity of my vocabulary offended those who did not possess the same amount as me.
With my father, he was required to show the extent of his knowledge of the English language when in his professional setting, but I have also heard himself “dumb it down” for his companions and allies.
“Wassup man it’s Speed I just left the crib I’m bouta swing down my mom’s house and pick her up a few things then I’m gonna shoot over to Man’s house and just chill there for a while.”
To master language, you must understand its levels. To convey your message, you must consider your surroundings and adapt. I don’t believe this is at all “Selling out” or “Being fake”. But rather, being understood. That is the sole purpose of language. To intertwine the thoughts of your mind with others’ thoughts.
Throughout my life I will continue to try my best to explain what I am feeling through language in hope that my words will fall in relation with whoever chooses to internalize what I say. As said in Mother Tongue by Amy Tan,
“I spend a great deal of my time thinking about the power of language -- the way it can evoke an emotion, a visual image, a complex idea, or a simple truth.”
Language is a power that everyone can possess, in one form or another. I choose to take full advantage of this power.
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