Led to Destruction


Jackie Middleswarth 11-20-13


(Puffs a cigarette) I take another breath in, and another breath out(takes a swig of alcohol). Ha. What has my life come to, yo.

(Talks to guy next to him) “Yo dawg, what is this shit? I’m on cloud nine right now…”

A couple years ago, I started high school. Ya know, the awkward freshman, wearin’ the nerd glasses, buttoned up shirt, and jean shorts to the belly button. Livin’ up to that angel image your parents’ wanted, nah mean? It was all bullshit. I mean, my parents just wanted the best of me, or so I thought. Most of the time, I think all they wanted was a kid they could show off to the world.

(Yells toward the sky) “WELL LOOK AT ME NOW, MA, PA!”

Ha. Perfect my ass. Look at the world today, just look at it. I was never told I had to be perfect, but that’s all I was accepted for by my folks. Ya know, I was a straight A kid, first through tenth! Anything under an A, and it was “No TV, no dinner, no nothin’.” One time I got an 89 out 100 on a test, and then a smack across the face(shutters).

This is something they should be proud of(takes a puff of a cig), I’m their boy, they should see me now. Just look at the world today, you never gonna fix the whole world. There’s always gonna be a shit ton of problems.

You see this?(Points to face) This damn scar? Oh, well, “I fell outta a tree,” or, “My cat scratched me.” I don’t own a damn cat, never did! My parents swore they’d never huuurt me.

(Looks up at sky, as if to talk to his parents)

“THIS IS ALL YOUR GUYS FAULT! Abandoned me in 10th grade, and even before that you guys didn’t appreciate me! I was never loved! You guys were too selfish, and only wanted a trophy son! I can’t tell you how amazing it felt to have the pressure off my back though when you guys died! You guys constantly badgering me to get honor roll, and do extracurriculars so I’d have a bright future. You know how many times I got kicked, and punched by classmates because I was ‘weird?’ I only said they were bruises from sports, so you, Pa, wouldn’t hit me even more when I came home! Yeah, it wasn’t my future you guys were worried about. No, it was just your image you guys wanted to build. And since you guys being perfect outside of home where the truth lied, what better way than to build a perfect son? You gonna keep me now? Your pothead of a son, or would I even be considered a son? Ma, you would just sit there and look heartbroken, like I stole her precious child, and Pa, you would smack me across the face. The same thing, everyday. You guys had to just die, I found you guys both dead, in the bathroom, blood smeared everywhere because I didn’t turn out how you guys wanted. You were gone just like that(shakes head downwards). No ‘bye.’ no ‘I love you, son.’ YOU WERE JUST GONE! EVEN THOUGH I RESENTED ALL THE TORMENT I GOT, IT’S NOT RIGHT TO JUST LEAVE THIS WORLD FROM YOUR ONLY SON WHEN HE’S ONLY 16! What bright future do I have now? Graduation is tomorrow and I have no scholarships, and no money. I have below a two GPA. Thanks guys, I thought you were supposed to be here for me(Gets up and starts to leave).”

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