Let It Go by Sandra Watson

One Christmas morning I sat on the edge of my bed kicking and swinging my feet back and forth. “Cover your eyes” She said. I placed one hand in front of each eye, trying to peek through my small hands. “NO! Don’t you dare peak” she yelled. I sighed and closed my eyes. My little anxious body was uncomfortably moving. All I could think is what could it be? The room was still for a moment, darkness filled under my eyelids and the only thing you could hear was the shuffling of feet from the other room. After minutes of impatiently waiting. She entered the room and placed an object down that made a loud thud.I opened my eyes to see my mom standing in the doorway and my dad with a camera in his hands, recording every moment of the big reveal. My sister was standing behind the big box that had been perfectly wrapped with Santa Claus Christmas paper. “Are you going to open it?” she asked with a smile. It was a box slightly bigger than me at the time. So I had to stand on my toes to reach the top.

 I started to unwrap the wrapping paper slowly because even then and  still now I loved the anticipation of opening a present. I peeled back the wrapping paper  strip by strip, tearing the clean tucked wrapping paper into many small pieces. “Come on, Sandra, open it already, Do you need help?” my sister barked. I shook my head fiercely no as I opened up the last shreds of paper. My dad grabbed the last pieces of wrapping paper to put into a big black trash bag. I stood there in astonishment to see a big pink cinderella vanity set in front of me. “Open it!,Open the box mom!” I yelled in joy “ Thank you so much.” I hugged my sister tightly as she hugged me back,kissing my forehead. Then I heard a loud thud from above, i woke up to see my dog Trixie on the floor spread out because she just fell off the bed. I look to see that it’s not Christmas morning and I’m not six anymore. I look around to see their is no vanity set and the picture of my sister is still sitting on my dresser and realize  she is no longer with us and tears fill my eyes. I can’t go back to sleep anymore. The memory was way too strong for me to handle. So instead I listen to music. Music that lets me drift away from those memories as I look at the picture on my wall  and get lost into the grey and whiteness of it all. 

Holding on to the past has always been a speciality of mine whether it was good or bad, something about holding on to the past helps me gain a little more power on my life. This probably is how most people feel and a big reason why a lot of people don’t let go of their past . It can be looked through many different perspectives which can shine a light on why holding onto your past can be a good thing and why it can be a bad thing. Holding onto your past can cripple your chances of having a good future but it can also help guide you so you don’t make the same mistakes you made in your past in your future. Is learning from your past the same thing as holding on to it? Is holding onto your past more of a yearning to go back and change what already was or is it letting yourself dwell on something that already happened? Is letting go asking you to forget your past or telling you to move into future? Letting go is something we personally define for ourselves but all us must build up on a general idea of what it is before we can actually do it.

All of us has had either someone or ourselves do something or say something that has affected us in a good or bad way. This something that has happened to us in the past can either had been dealt with and processed in a healthy or unhealthy way. It all depends on our personal processing but those who deal with these things unhealthy are more bound to not to let it go.People who hold onto the past are the people who are dwelling in a moment that can not be changed. They are simply replaying the event over and over not just not in their heads but in their day to day life. When people can’t let the past go they tend to usually apply the good or bad things into their daily lives because if you can’t let go of the past you’ll probably repeat it . We can’t relive the pas7t we bring the our past into the future. It’s a coping method, even though change is relevant to all of our lives not everyone can handle it. Moving into the future is not a task it’s a mission.

Letting go is not asking you to give up your memories or your past, far from it. It is asking you not to focus on it forever. Remembering and learning from your past so that you can transition into the next state of your life is what letting go is asking you to do.You can’t be in one place and want to go to another and not move a step. You’ll remain in that same place until you go. Now time will move on without you weather you like it or not. You can’t stop time but stopping your life is easy because you just stop living it. Living in one moment forever will literally stop you from living life. You’ll be too invested into that moment that you won’t realize the wonderful things you’re missing out on. Moving into the future means to continue with time,letting life take its course without trying to change or alter it to go back. Moving into the future means seizing opportunities to make to progress and be at your best. Moving into the future and defining what that looks like for you is up you but defining how you remember your past in a healthy way is also up to you.

You have to find and define what that means for you, what moving into the future and remembering the past is to you. No one else can define this for you because well all operate, think,breath, and move in different ways. There are the basic steps on how to let go but to make them your goals and make it something you actually want to do you must make it personal because your past and future is personal. How do you make it personal to you? How do you define what letting go means to you? You must define it, first by setting goals for yourself. Aiming to change the ways of your past day by day. Breaking bad habits and finding healthy ones to replace them with. Surround yourself with people who support you, know your struggle and are happy to help you go through it. It has been time for you to you to let go of your past and move into your future. A pause or a break is for vacations not your past.