My Body, My Choice

It was a random weekday when I got a text the day before from a friend who I’ve known for a long time but haven’t talked to in a while. He texted me about if I wanted to go to the gym with him. I was pessimistic about it because I wasn’t sure how it’ll turn out. But, I went along with the plan and signed up. Right after school the next day I met up with him and began our first day at the gym. As I kept going, I started to like going to the gym and the control I had with my body. I was able to control the intensity that I trained at and freedom I had with my own body. However, in The Handmaid’s Tale, by Margaret Atwood the main narrator Offred, has the opposite from me. Offred has no control or freedom over her own body. Reading through The Handmaid’s Tale reminded me that being able to make choices for my own body is a privilege that is not guaranteed for everyone. Being in the gym has taught me that control over your own body is not just physical, but also mental. Every choice I choose from the weight to intensity shows that I am in charge of my own body. In contrast with Offred every aspect of her life under Gilead’s ideology is for one purpose and that is to give birth to the children of the Commander. As stated in the novel, “It’s true, and I don’t ask why, because I know. Give me children, or else I die. There’s more than one meaning to it” (55). This shows Offred’s value as a handmaid, which is her ability to give children or die. Her understanding that she doesn’t ask why, shows the forced meaning Gilead gives to handmaids. Though she says that she will die if she doesn’t have children, it can also be the human meaning that she will feel like she has died because Gilead will strip Offred of everything that makes her human, showing the mental control over her body. Depending on how I felt or how my body felt I rested or adjusted my workouts to adapt to how I was feeling. On certain days I felt like eating fast food and cheating on my diet. This showed me the autonomy I had with my body outside the gym. In Gilead, that autonomy is stripped away. “I used to think of my body as an instrument, of pleasure, or a means of transportation, or an implement for the accomplishment of my will” (73). This quote shows Offred’s past experience with the body before Gilead. Her body as an instrument of pleasure showed that she could experience and enjoy life freely. With her body being a means of transportation this shows her independence. Offred’s implementation for her own will shows how she could act on her choices and desires. Showing the autonomy she has on her own body in her past. Now under Gilead’s rules, her body is no longer hers, being owned and regulated by Gilead, used for a sole purpose of reproduction. As I continued to progress in the gym I realized my body has changed and I started to care about myself. For Offred, she is no longer able to care for how her body looks. “But we weren’t supposed to care about our complexions anymore, she’d forgotten that” (55). Showing how Gilead has taken away individuality and self expression over their bodies. Imposing strict control over women’s own bodies and even their thoughts, deciding what they should value. “We are containers, it’s only the insides of our bodies that are important. The outside can become hard and wrinkled, for all they care, like the shell of a nut.” (96). This quote furthermore shows Gilead’s control over these handmaid’s bodies and how they directly change the value of handmaids like Offred. Under Gilead’s rules these handmaids had to change their values on their bodies, showing that even when the outside of their body was hard and wrinkled, only their insides were important. This control under Gilead’s rules highlights the psychological impact that follows without being able to have control over your own body which then forces you to lose identity and individuality. Reading The Handmaid’s Tale changed how I viewed personal freedom and the importance of my body. My experiences in the gym showed me my control over my body and my ability to shape my own life. Offred’s loss of bodily autonomy shows how devastating it can be when the freedom and control over your body are taken away. This novel has made me realize that true power is having the ownership of your body, your actions, and your identity.