Self Confidence Arlana Brown

January 4, 2011

English

Silver Stream

Self Confidence

“What’s your name?” she says.

“Arlana Brown I am here for an interview. I am supposed to meet with Mr. Jackson,” I state.

“Have a seat Mr. Jackson will be with you in a while. While you wait can I ask a question?” she says.

“Yes you may” I reply.

“What school do you go to? Most youth come in here with their pants down, cussing, and just everything we don’t need here?” she stammers.

“Thank you I take that as a compliment and I go to Science Leadership Academy on 22^nd and Arch Streets” I reply.

“Oh that really good school that just opened. I heard about them before my niece is supposed to go there. Well thanks for answering my question and nice talking to you. Actually Mr. Jackson is waiting for you. Sorry to keep you waiting. And by the way, off the record I think you will get the job. Good luck!” she says happily.

“Thanks Miss.”, I say confused.

“Mrs. Williams”, she replies.

“Thanks Mrs. Williams you have a good day” I reply.

I go and take a seat and remember what she says. It brightened up my day with the compliment she gave me. Most people say I am hyper and that I usually mispronounce my words. I guess I talk differently around my friends and then when it is business. It’s a time and a place for everything. It was my time to go in for the job and of course I am looking fresh. I have fresh dress clothes on and now time to switch to business mode. I leave street talk behind when I walk through his door. This is the start to my whole life.

We start the interview. He came to a decision I was still in school and the job was far to travel to everyday. He said it wasn’t that I wasn’t capable and wasn’t qualified, it was that the time of my school and the job would interfere. He told me to come see him when I turn 18 and he would have a position ready for me. Walking away that day didn’t make me see that things went bad for me, it actually went good. I was happy that he told me that because I knew for myself that I was capable of talking to people in higher places than they and I thought I was highly educated for my age. I went back to Mrs. Williams and explained what happened and she exclaimed with “What! If I was in there I would hire you, I would pick you up everyday so you could have this job. Well he is obviously blind to not hire you. But one day he will remember and will be very upset to see you on Oprah. You’re a talented and intelligent young women and I wish you the best”.

I was so shocked she said this that I flew over and gave her a hug and told her “thank you”. In How To Tame A Wild Tongue, Glona Anzaldía writes, “Ethnic identity is twin to linguistic identity-I am my language”. Your language is the same as your skin, as is your personality. Your language represents you. She also writes that, “Until I can take pride in my language, I cannot take pride in myself”. I have had experiences when people would tell me “you say this wrong” and I would get mad and feel I hate the way I talk, until one day. I had to learn that no matter what you speak or how you speak, you are who you are. Nothing can change that not even your language. From that day I had the self-determination that I could do anything no matter what! I learned people that knew me for 5 minutes gave me more credit then people who knew me for a lifetime. Just the way you look can determine the language you speak. It’s your choice to live by the stereotype.