The Center of The Universe Is a Man’s World

While writing this essay I wanted to bring awareness to how precious a woman is and bring attention to the fact that our soul purpose is not to serve a man. It’s to show the digression of the level of feistiness we have as we grow up in a world that tries to mold us as the archetype servant for a man. I tried to be as honest as possible with my opinions but to also get the reader to understand this isn’t a persuasive essay but one to open eyes and minds. I am proud of this essay because it stands out from many of my other pieces of writing. It’s not about heartbreak, or race wars, depression, it’s about being a woman. It was fun to not be stuck in my same writing topic and divert from the usual. Even though I am very proud of my work in this essay but for future essays I will focus on descriptive writing more, so that I can transport the reader into the scene.

When we are little princesses,we don’t worry about what we wear around our uncles, or if our stepdad will come in the house when we’re getting out of the shower. When the pod becomes a flower it gets pushed into the dark.

Everyday after preschool there was a routine. My grand-pop picked me up, brought me ice cream sandwiches, took me home, made me waffles, we watched cartoons and went to sleep. Naps with my grand-pop were the ones I’ll remember the most, they’re the reason I don’t know how to do homework until 8pm.

I was the babygirl. I woke up from my nap at the age of 12 with girl parts that now set boundaries for me. When a girl grows a woman’s body too early her childhood slips like sand between her fingers. I always wondered why my grand-mom let me and my grand-pop eat while she just washed the dishes. Why my mom felt obligated to make my stepdad breakfast before the rest of the house. Why when my grand-pop had company my grand-mom would say to stay upstairs with her until they left. Why do we go from princess to house slave? Scared to speak unless spoken to, cooking, cleaning, being fully submissive, unselfish, and unconditionally loving. I remember watching Weezy Jefferson go toe to toe with her husband. It made no sense to me why the Jefferson’s didn’t apply to real life. I guess that’s why they say TV is fabricated. TV even depicted modern day moms as sassy, independent,and witty like Rochelle from ‘Everybody Hates Chris’. She is a depiction of the way married women are supposed to be, but why aren’t wives living up to these standards? Are they too high, for the modern day wife?

By the age of 14 I had two sister in-laws. I’ve watched both of them cry, but only in private. It is written in the universal invisible rules of relationships that “if you and your significant other are having problems your outside demeanor should not say so”. Men can cheat, hit, go out, etc. If a women were to do these things they would be looked at as crazy or as hoes. We are forced to keep our pain private. I’ve watched my sister in-laws fake their smiles to the point their faces might crack. One of them,Jade, is 5 years older than me. She’s beautiful with long black hair, tan skin, and an hourglass figure. I’ve seen her breakdown and tell herself “I love him…I can’t leave him”. I don’t know why love makes a woman mindless. She tells me “You won’t understand until you fall in love”, if that’s what love is count me out. “I would never be that stupid” “I would never let a n**** play me”- Said every girl whose words bit her in the ass.

The line between stupidity and love seem to be blurred sometimes. The line between self respect and mindlessness seem to overlap. If the world was full of little girls what would men have? No wife, no servants, no one to blame for their life going wrong, no one’s heart to mangle, nor no one to make excuses for them. Little girls with hair and mouths that can’t be tamed. Princesses who get answers and never give them. What would men do with a world of headstrong girls? We go from being carried on backs to a man’s world nearly breaking them. It scares me to think that I can’t be the Wheezy to someone’s George, the Lucy to a Ricardo, but instead a Ceely to a Mister.

The rules of this game called ‘Life’ were written before paper. Men were winning before women were presented to the playing field. Hundreds of years ago a man was raised to be independent, headstrong, selfish with his time and efforts. Women were raised to look for a husband trained to be a housewife. Females did not understand the power of realizing self worth. Women did not understand how much raw potential they had because all they knew was that getting a husband would be a lifetime achievement. In society it took centuries for a woman to be looked at as an equal, as another being and not an accessory to a man.

A conversation with my grand-mom will always stick with me. While riding in the car going to school, doing my usual game of 21 questions with her, one of her answers stood out to me. I asked “why can’t relationships be equal?” “Relationships aren’t really meant to be equal.You have to be submissive to your husband because he will be in charge. Yes you have a say but sometimes what they say goes.” I tried to give her statement the benefit of the doubt. Tried to convince myself that these thoughts were just coming from her 60 year old mind. But, I realized that it wasn’t her mind, it wasn’t even really her opinion. It was the result of her training, they were the words of the world and its ways. I’m fearful that 20 years from now my daughter will have to push her feelings to the side because she fell in love. Or that I will have a son who feels entitled because he was born male.

I’ve realized I can’t let the world teach me how to be a woman. My pride will forever stick with me. The colorful mind of a young girl will forever rest on my shoulders. I’ve always viewed relationships as equal; I’ve viewed relationships more like partnerships. It might be new aged but that’s the way I see it. I’ve always been a sunflower never to be pushed in the dark.