For my capstone project, I decided to combine engineering with my passion for the gym by making a lifting bench for working out. I started my capstone by researching workout benches that were both machine-made and man-made. I first looked at some that were professionally built like you would find at a gym. I then looked at some workout benches other people had made themselves at home. While looking at both types I took notes on the details I wanted to include in my bench and the aspects I wanted to avoid. After compiling a list I used Fusion 360 to create my first design. After planning everything out I acquired the metal needed to construct the frame. I sought out the help of a family friend who has a lot of equipment in his garage. He was first able to help me cut the metal to the correct size and angles to join them together. Afterward, he taught me how to use the welding equipment he had and assisted me in welding parts of the frame together. I then drilled some holes to connect the remaining moving parts before painting it black. To make the seats I cut out some plywood, covered it with a cloth, and filled it with foam padding. It was a lot of fun learning to work with a new material and I’m glad I tried something new.

Link to slideshow: https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1Wc1TI1aXQ-hWred0ZA1TSrOtqsbnF5WCB6INXvzcCug/edit?usp=sharing

Link to bibliography: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1eaTYutKaiN1ovwJNy0lNcCqrBGLP50dMFL5PLNbsTFg/edit?usp=sharing

Here we can see Chief Bromden looking through the window of the ward late at night. A grass field dimly lit by moonlight lies on the other side of the window. Across the field, there are scattered digger squirrel holes and pine trees. In the distant sky, there’s a flying v of birds soaring through the moonlight. Chief Bromden can see a dog exploring the dark lonely field. Chief Bromden watches the dog exploring the night saying, “sniffing digger squirrel holes, not with the notion of to go digging for after one but just to get an idea of what they were up to at this hour.” (142) Bromden sees part of himself in the dog as they are both exploring late at night. Bromden himself was “I walked among the guys heaped in long white rows like snowbanks, careful not to bump into somebody, till I came to the wall with the windows.” (141) Bromden is exploring the ward late at night, not with the intention of escaping but simply because he is curious as to what goes on late at night when everyone is asleep. Similarly, the dog is exploring the field, not with the intention of going after a digger squirrel but just because he is curious. As Bromden continues to watch the dog, he sees the dog look up into the sky and after a few moments, Bromden hears the geese too. Bromden notices that the dog “was still standing with his paw up,” (143) long after the geese flew over them. Bromden has been watching the dog enjoy its freedom and yet at the sight of birds, the dog becomes jealous of their ability to fly. The dog stands there watching them fly, wishing he too could fly. At the same time, Bromden leans his head against the window, watching the dog, wishing he too could be free to run in the open field. While the two aren’t in the same position, they share jealousy of what someone else has that they don’t. This shows Kesey’s intent to demonstrate the things everyone takes for granted. The dog has no idea that Bromden is watching and doesn’t realize how lucky he is to begin with. Kesey is demonstrating that the grass will always be greener on the other side, even when some people don’t have any grass at all. While Bromden and the dog are both jealous of other animals’ freedom, they still have polar opposite positions of freedom themselves. When the dog wanders off from home, he still has the option to come and go whenever he pleases whereas Bromden is stuck inside. Bromden is stuck behind the glass window, watching a dog do everything he wishes he could do himself and for that, he envies the dog. Up until this moment, we’ve seen constant similarities between the situation of patients in the ward and animals that are mistreated. For example, Bromden’s description of one of the patients being summoned by the big nurse saying, “he crawled to her like a dog to a whipping.” (86) This situation goes one step further and puts the dog in a position of more power than Bromden and the other patients, adding to his sense of helplessness. He is no longer on the same level as a captive animal, he is now beneath it.

Survivor - 2WEI

Throughout the novel we see that Offred is a survivor, enduring the worst of situations and yet she never gives up. In the song “Survivor,” by 2WEI, they sing, “I’m a survivor. I’m not gon’ give up. I’m not gon’ stop. I’m gon’ work harder.” Similarly, in the book, we constantly see Offred continue to persevere through the world of Giliad no matter how bad the situation gets. Earlier on in the book, Offred is moved from the red center to the commander’s house. She is immediately met with Serena Joy who takes a quick dislike to her and wastes no time in showing Offred that she has power over her. The commander’s wife is not the only challenge that Offred now faces but she is also forced to be a handmaid. Whether she wants to or not, Offred is forced to have sex with the commander and ultimately bear his child, yet she perseveres. Later on in the book, the commander takes Offred to the club and at the end of the night expects her to have sex with him. When faced with this situation she thinks to herself, “let’s get this over with or you’ll be here all night. Bestir yourself. Move your flesh around., breathe audibly.” (255) It is evident from her thoughts that Offred has to talk herself into having sex with the commander because she clearly doesn’t want to. Offred has thought many times about giving up, killing herself, and never having to deal with this world again, but it is hope that motivates her to persevere. “Hope is rising in me, like sap in a tree. Blood in a wound. We have made an opening. I want to ask her if she’s seen Moira, if anyone can find out what’s happened to Luke, to my child, my mother even.” (169) Hope that she will one day be reunited with her family, that is what keeps her going. That is what makes her a survivor. One that will never give up.

Never Forget You - Zara Larsson

In the chorus of the song “Never Forget You,” by Zara Larsson, she sings, “I will never forget you. You will always be by my side. Since the day that I met you, I knew that I would love you ‘til the day I die.” This set of lyrics is portrayed perfectly by the way that Offred always remembers her family. Whether it is in her dreams, in a picture, or simply in her own thoughts she is constantly reminding herself of the ones she loves. The reader can see clear evidence of this after Moira escapes from the gymnasium. Not knowing whether Moira was alive or not or if she would ever see Moira again, Offred constantly thought about how Moira would react or respond to certain situations she found herself in. “Don’t think that way, Moira would say.” (85) “Moira was always more logical than I am.” (171) “Chickenshit, Moira would say.” (232) No matter what the circumstance was, if Offred was unsure or worried, she would almost always think about what Moira would encourage her to do. This demonstrates Offred’s true love for Moira and how Moira will always be by Offred’s side, even if she’s not physically there.

Dancing With Your Ghost - Sasha Alex Sloan

The song, “Dancing With Your Ghost,” describes the way Sloan dreams of being with someone she lost, singing, “every night I’m dancing with your ghost. I stay up all night tell myself I’m all right.” Similarly, in the book, Offred spends every night dreaming of being back with Luke or her daughter. In chapter 18, labeled ‘Night,’ Offred dreams of being with Luke saying, “Laying in bed, with Luke, his hand on my rounded belly.” (103) In the following chapter, Offred describes another dream saying, “I pick her up and feel arms and legs go around me and I begin to cry, because I know I am not awake.” (109) In each of these separate instances, Offred dreams of being with the family she has lost. While Sloan sings about dancing with the ghost of her lost loved one, Offred dreams of doing the most simple things like laying in bed with her husband and giving her daughter a hug. She has been denied physical touch for so long that these interactions are all she wishes to get from the family she’s lost.

In the song, Sloan goes on to sing, “I gotta move on but it hurts to try,” corresponding perfectly to Offred holding on to the past. She misses the life she had in the time before and wants more than anything to return to the life she had. However, as time goes on she is slowly starting to forget the memories she has from back then, “it’s my fault. I am forgetting too much,” (193) symbolizing that she is getting accustomed to her new life and unintentionally moving on. This brings her a great deal of pain as she values the memories of her family above all else, connecting back to the idea in the lyric that it hurts to move on.

Silence - Marshmello

The song “Silence,” by Maarshmello connects directly to Offred’s relationship with the commander. In the song, Marshmello sings, “I found peace in your violence. Can’t tell me there’s no point in trying.” This is perfectly demonstrated in the book as Offred has found slivers of peace in the commander that in her eyes, make him human. In the book, Offred recalls a documentary about World War 2 and the wife of a Nazi prison guard. She recalls the wife saying, “She did not believe he was a monster, he was not a monster to her. Probably he had some endearing trait.” (145) Offred goes on to say, “How easy it is to invent a humanity, for anyone at all. What an available temptation,” (146) acknowledging her own desire to find humanity in the commander despite his similarities with the nazi guard. While the guard enforced rules that punished and killed Jewish people, the commander enforces rules that punish and even led to the death of women, making them both monsters. Yet Offred at times, has been able to focus on the endearing trait of the commander, Scrabble, and thus sees him as human. Amongst all the agony and suffering he has caused for people in Giliad, Offred has found peace in his love for Scrabble, just like the lyric in the song.

Power - Kanye West

The song “Power,” by Kanye West contains lines that represent both sides of the social hierarchy in Giliad, perfectly displaying the polar opposite perspectives. Specifically towards the end of the song West says, “where you hiding? I got the power to make your life so exciting,” which is perfectly displayed in chapters 35-39 when the commander takes Offred to the club. Acting as though it is a treat for her and she should be grateful. We see evidence of this when the commander asks Offred, “enjoying yourself?” to which Offred says, “he wants me to. This is a treat after all.” (240) This demonstrates the commander’s self centered perspective as he believes that he is doing Offred a favor by sneaking her into the club when in reality, the only reason he brought her there is to use her for sex without Serena Joy having to be present. Moreover, this isn’t the first time the commander has ‘given’ Offred something only to expect something in return. Earlier in the book, the commander gives Offred hand lotion for her skin which he presents as a gift but in reality, the only reason he gave her the lotion is because he wants her to play Scrabble with him late at night. The commander sees himself as Offred’s savior, helping her by giving her a purpose and luxuries like the club and lotion when in reality, everything he does is only for himself.

Quickly after that initial line, West sings, “now this would be a beautiful death. I’m jumping out the window. I’m letting everything go.” This relates perfectly to the way the women see their lives in the new society. When we are first introduced to the red center, Offred describes all the changes made to the gymnasium, noting the removal of chandeliers and mirrors. She explains the removal of those items when she says, “It isn’t running away they’re afraid of. We wouldn’t get far. It’s those other escapes, the ones you can open in yourself given a cutting edge.” (8) This theme of suicide is brought up again when Moira is captured and was is being returned to the city. Moira said, “I did consider offing myself, and maybe I would have if there’d been anyway.” (248) This actively demonstrates that most of the women see death as a way out, an escape from the prison their lives have become the same way Kanye West said, “now this would be a beautiful death,” in the song. However, these quotes also show the lengths that the people in charge have gone to to ensure that these women don’t get the opportunity to escape. While men think of it as an exciting reward, women find it so horrible that they would almost prefer death.

Here we can see the two stalls that Offred and Moira would hide in at a specific time so they could talk for a few minutes. This part of the book shows the lengths they must go to for basic interactions. Interactions that we take for granted every day. You can see the damp floors as the building is fairly run down and poorly cared for. This reflects the dystopian world that they live in where every aspect of their lives is a battle they are desperately trying to win. Covered up by cheap paint that has already begun to peel, the stalls have emerging graffiti that predates their arrival in the gymnasium. The singular window rests high up in the corner of the bathroom, bared off like one you would find in a prison, emphasizing the similarity between their situation and that of a prisoner. The bathroom is dimly lit by one small light hanging from the center of the ceiling. The yellow stained urinals not only show the lack of care shown to the restrooms but also the desperation of the situation they’re in. They have so many women in the gymnasium that they have to resort to using both restrooms. Offred and Moira condemn themselves to these rundown bathrooms for the sole goal of having a conversation. They bring their faces close to a hole in the cracking wooden stalls so they can hear each other’s whispers. Speaking softly so that no guard or aunt can hear their prohibited conversation.

A singular light hangs from the ceiling, trying desperately to light up the room while simultaneously symbolizing their conversation. Their life in the gymnasium is inhuman, the darkness in the restroom. Their simple exchange of words is the light they’re holding on to, trying to overpower the darkness that surrounds them. Speaking to each other for a few brief moments is all they have to look forward to. The only aspect of their lives they still have some control over. Every other human interaction is restricted and overseen by the aunts. Guards who strictly enforce the new rules law, which are vastly different from the lives they used to live. Lives that the handmaids are encouraged to forget. 

However, one’s past can never truly be forgotten. The blue paint that covers the previously graffitied stalls is already starting to peel. Revealing the neon pink art that was once the face of the stalls. No matter how hard the paint tries to cover up the graffiti, it will always be there and it will eventually reemerge. Like the laws that predate Giliad, they have not been forgotten. While the new ways of life have covered them up, they will reappear. To Offred her graffiti is Luke, who she believes will find his way back to her no matter the challenges he faces. The run down stalls show that the old ways of life can weather the storm and return despite a few cracks. No matter how strict Giliad is now, people will find their way back to the graffiti.