Advanced Essay #2: The Preset Mold The World Gives You

Introduction: The purpose of this essay is to explain the preset mold people get throughout their life and how to handle it. Something I'm proud about with my essay is my scene of memory because it was a big shift in my life in becoming who I am. I would want to improve my writing process by connecting with my sources more.

My life did a lot of molding as I have grown into the person I am today. I think this is true for a lot of people, no matter how much someone will try to control the image of what you’re supposed to be based on gender and race. This image is mostly made from what they’ve experienced from people similar to you.  It can make you think differently of yourself and change how you decide to carry on in the outside world.

The movie Beast of the Southern Wild touches on a topic of identity and what you’re supposed to be. The movie explored the relationship between the main character Hushpuppy, who was a young wild girl, and her father, who was stern and complicated.  You also see the way she was raised throughout the film. At one point, there was a scene where we heard Hushpuppy’s inner thoughts and she stated, “It wasn’t no time to be a bunch of pu*****.” This was a mindset she learned from her father in the Bathtub, which is where she lived. The dynamic switches between her identity of being a “girl” and who she was raised to be because it’s always believed that boys are supposed to get that type of upbringing. So in the eyes of the viewer, this challenges the idea that only the boys are supposed to be in the “no crying” mindset while growing up but we see that in some ways, it depends on a person’s environment too.

When I was around 9 years old, I played on a basketball team. I never took it seriously because I never had a reason to. My parents always put the idea in my head that sports are just for fun. The thing is I was a very sore loser at that age and at one of my games, we lost in a way that didn’t make any sense to me. It was the last seconds of the game. Everyone was screaming and cheering because we were down by two points. I drove to the paint and went up for a layup and took a hard foul. I hit the ground so hard and all I saw was red when I didn’t hear a whistle for a foul. I screamed in frustration and shortly stormed off the court and started to cry. My dad ran after me. He told me in a strong tone, “Don’t ever act like that again, men don’t cry. He said you’re acting like a girl.” I heard “men don’t cry” a lot so when he said it, I didn’t think much of it. I just wiped my tears and went back to the court. As I got older, I never really found myself to share my emotions at all. It was hard for me to feel the urge to cry in certain situations where my family was crying. I had the mindset that I had to be strong for everyone else around me because that’s the image that was always pushed onto me to be a man.

These images of what you’re supposed to be can stem from other people other than your guardian. In the book Lies That Bind by Kwame Anthony Appiah other people made assumptions about him based on his race and appearance. When talking about places he had traveled, he said, “Colored” person; in Rome, for an Ethiopian; and one London cabbie refused to believe I didn’t speak Hindi.” This quote shows that  there will always be an image of what you should be in other people’s eyes simply based off of looks. If you reject these expectations, you could miss out on opportunities in life because of you not wanting to be something you’re not. People could also begin to dislike you if you don’t live up to their expectations that they get from other people of your race or gender. In the long run, you should always stay true to yourself.

Having a parent mold your upbringing or having someone having a preset mold of who you are from your looks aren’t always bad things. You could use these expectations to better yourself or you could break these expectations to create a better image of yourself. Race and gender are important to me because they’re factors of the person I am today. Before anything, I will always be identified as an African-American male. From the way my father raised me to the way, people see me outside are all things I appreciate because they made me who I am today and will continue to make me me.