It was finally daylight. The night before I thought I could drink all of my problems away- but here I am. My last beer is half full, and I still feel diddly like I have for the past year. My wife was gone, she died from a heart attack. I didn’t even get to say goodbye. The bills are piling up and so is my anger and frustrations. My daughter hates me but how could I blame her, I hate myself. Everything is falling apart. I can’t take it, I try not to burst with anger but I can’t help it. It’s apart of who I am now, without it I am nothing.
“I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!”
I slammed my beer bottle down in frustration. Not noticing where the glass was, I stepped on a piece. The whetted pieces cut my foot, and I immediately cried out in pain. I picked up the pieces drunkenly, and threw them in the trash. For some reason, these actions only made me more angry.
“ It’s my fault. Everything is my fault. What is wrong with me? Has all the pain I’ve put myself and my daughter through been my fault?"
Fifteen
October 31, 2012
High school sucks everything is just so Knotty. I still have to do my homework, and I forgot to buy my costume, and aaahhh I need a costume for tonight.
Oh, I forgot to introduce myself “LOL”. My name is Vanessa. I'm a sophomore. I’m 15, going to be foreve— uhh that’s weird, it’s Halloween today. My friends and I were planning on hanging at my place tonight, I’m throwing a small party.
“Hey Vanessa! Do you have a lot of snacks at your house?”
“Yes, why?”
“Ok I'm coming!” That was my friend Josh. He’s a Knee-slapper, a football player, and all the girls crush on him. I guess I am the quiet and sheepish one out of my friends.
“You getting lunch?” asked Emily
“Yeah,” I say. We all quickly got into the lunch line
Ding! text message from Sofie.
:Ricky’s staring at us
She could have whispered it to me
I reply I know
Ricky’s the really suspicious quiet girl she never talks to anybody
Sofie says she’s walking towards us
“Hey do you guys want to come over tonight i’m throwing a little party she had a mischievous look on her face I wonder what she was thinking about.
Josh quickly answers “Nah trust me we would like to go but we're kind of busy today, Uh he stutters all of us are going to be busy
Ricky gives a hard compelling stare and says with what
With uhh were spending the night at Vanessa’s
“Oh really that’s cool
She looks at me with her hard stare and I couldn’t remember anything after that none of us could remember anything after that part but all I know is that we agreed to going over to her house.
And we were all standing in front of her door
“Oh hello!” she says, her green eyes staring into ours, “come in have seat.”
It seemed as though she hadn't cleaned her house in years it was so dusty and I could see cobwebs everywhere which didn’t look like halloween decorations
My friends and I eyeballed each other I don’t know why I'm even here or why I even came look
We were so distracted with ourselves that when I turned around she was gone
I was turned that night. Today is Halloween. 10/31/16
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