For my senior capstone project I made a stained glass window. The idea started because I had done stained glass with The Stained Glass Project at the Kedrick Rec Center for my internship for junior year (now based at Woodmere Art Museum in Mt Airy). I loved the program and knew I wanted to come back next year. To create this capstone project we had a timeline, featuring the ideal design process and the creation process. I learned a lot about safety, the importance of connection and networking, and collaboration

The Handmaid’s Tale has a new form of hierarchy. A new system. In this hierarchy there are men and women separated. And in these smaller categories, there is also hierarchy. Wives, Aunts, Marthas, Handmaids, Econwives, and Unwomen. This ranking system is most based on the ability to produce babies and moral values including before the new system was implemented. The way the system goes, it seems very much based on religious values and it’s being pushed on the whole community. We don’t know how far the system spans in the world but it seems like something not too limited. This notion of religious beliefs and such a vastly different government being forced upon citizens just doesn’t sit right. Another thing that was noted was that for each class of woman, there were different dress colors. Blue for wives (like representing the virgin mary and innocence), Aunts would wear light brown dresses, Martha’s wear green, Handmaids wear red, econwives wear green and blue striped dresses. This is similar to uniforms for school, and as a student I would hate a uniform. Uniforms are to make everyone less individual and uniform. Personally I don’t agree with this because I think self expression through clothing is really important and something I value a lot. I also like to see other people use it as an expression as well. When you think about their strategies to keep order in their system in order, you think of the wall. Or that’s what I thought of. It’s a tactic they use to scare people into submission. That seems to be a theme. Scaring people into submission to their roles. It’s very toxic and I kind of wonder how sustainable it is. How long it will last. The obsession with the wall is representative of values that the higher ups deem wrong. And the consequences that come with not following the ideas of the more powerful. It’s a very strict society where emotions are devalued and therefore people also become dehumanized as emotions are a huge part of humanity. The hierarchy seems to also value “purity” in the eyes of god. For example Serena Joy became a wife because she proved in her old life before the new regime, that she was pure and hadn’t sinned. This bringing in of religion is not new to the world. Like when christianity was being pushed upon people in the past, a similar thing is happening in this book. Also, in the Handmaid’s Tale, there are soul scrolls and lots of mention of prayer. The mention of these are interesting to me because it’s very private, while usually people are scared because they feel constantly watched and spied on. The uncomfort level for women has increased. The Hierarchy of Giead also reveals that the structure of it itself puts women against each other and creates a very quiet, but very judgemental society. Increase in gossip as well because of the lack of communication lines. This environment is women versus women is the most toxic way. Meaning that women are being re taught to hate on other women and criticize them and in turn themselves. They are put down a lot. Our protagonist even seems to have some internalized misogyny instilled in her. Perhaps she was a little like this before gilead, but I think it has definitely increased the more time she spends in gilead. But because she is so much less powerful than many other ranks, she is more easily manipulated. She is put in a position where she feels unsafe to others, and where she is “less than”. Like when the commander takes her to Jezabels, she literally can’t say no. She was put into a position where she could not say no to protect her own life. I don’t think there should be any way she should have been put into a situation she can’t say no in.

This scene in the handmaid's tale is when Offred and Serena Joy have an unlikely interaction where Serena who has been more known to be a rule follower, takes a photo of Offred's child from the old world and shows it to Offred in an act of kindness. But really It’s just to push her own agenda. She now is the holder of information that Offred wants, but during this interaction, Offred has feelings and thoughts about learning this information. She reflects on the meaning of being a mother. She says “But she exists in her white dress. She grows and lives. Isn’t that a good thing? A blessing? Still, I can’t bear it, to have been erased like that. Bette she’d brought me nothing”(228). This is contradictory to before in the book when she asked for knowledge from the commander. But now she is regretting gaining this knowledge. So that begs the question, What is knowledge? A blessing or a curse? Does it depend on the situation? And why does this pain her more than help her. Before this, she thought that asking for knowledge was getting answers and also power. And as humans it makes sense because curiosity is a very human trait. But what does knowledge bring with it? Darkness? Offred seems to think that knowing too much can kill you. 
The longer the book goes on, her view of knowledge grows and changes according to how it makes her feel. In many ways knowledge is useful and brings a lot of benefits the majority of the time. But in contrast to that, information can hurt people mentally. Like Offred, people will want to know things (especially when it relates to them directly), and sometimes it will hurt, but really it’s dependent on multiple factors. Like who the person is, how they take the information (like interpret it), and what the information is to them. 
Knowledge makes it so you can’t imagine as much information. For example in the picture above, she learns that her daughter is still alive and thriving, but the catch is that she’s experiencing life without Offred who wished to be a part of it. Now that Offred knows this she can’t imagine that her daughter escaped, or died. It doesn’t give her the closure she so wanted from the photo. Now her imagination is more limited and she can’t indulge in those same fantasies. 

The importance of knowing oneself is most commonly known as a really good thing and is associated with giving a person clarity and a feeling like taking a deep breath of fresh air. Something people don’t really realize while striving for this achievement, is that the journey comes with contemplation of your mental health. Mental health has been pretty overly stigmatized in the media (media suasion) to the point where it is commonly known for being a dangerous or scary thing. On my previous SLATE post, I covered a few examples of how and what the media has stigmatized. Because of this research I thought it would be good to start off with a smaller action to raise awareness as a sort of way to get comfortable with this form of activism. My main idea for this poster was to try and push and move the normalization of people with any kind of mental health issues. More specifically, the conversations of mental health. Since a lot of the time people with these different issues get clumped into a category with other people with different symptoms and clumping people together isn’t known for being great at all, I believe normalizing the conversation of people being different and with many kinds of mental illnesses or not helps make the misconceptions of mental illnesses lessened. “We’re Basically All Struggling With Mental Health Right Now—Let’s Normalize It” by Jessica A Gold explains the importance of these conversations and also gives a few tips on some simple things that you can do to help out as well.

It’s hard to tell when you are making a difference, at least in the beginning, but there are other ways I also try to help this cause in day to day life that I believe does something. I try to have meaningful conversations with people about the states of mental health when it comes up, unless they are really uncomfortable. If they do feel uncomfortable I usually drop the conversation but also bring it up later if I feel like its important. This could feel really bad or really rewarding depending on what kind of person I’m talking to, and a lot of other components also contribute to this as well. It feels good to know that you made a difference in the world, or at least put it out there that you tried and succeeding is kind of a bonus. A big bonus, but a bonus nonetheless. I realized that the idea is primarily to make a change, but trying to do that, and also the intentions and ambition behind it make a difference as well.

The project is never really done for me. I don’t think it’s something that can really be “fixed” but it can definitely be better. Looking back on this project I think I could have and maybe should have chosen a project that was a little more ambitious and less “easy” in a way. I feel like even though this was probably a good first step, this project could’ve had more components to it that made it stand out more or something that made it different. It feels a little like I took the easy way out, but really I think I would have done more if it were a little less time crunched. Overall I think this was a good experience that I can rely on for sources and information to back up the main idea mostly.

(side note) - The watermark was very much unintentional and I couldn’t get rid of it so sorry if it’s a little bit more difficult to read because of that.

Mental illness is widespread and it’s only increasing. When I noticed there were a lot of common themes in movies I watched that included someone with a mental illness of any type, I saw that they were mostly aggressive, dangerous, etc. Stuff that really seemed off to me because I know a number of people who suffer from minor to more severe cases of mental illness who weren’t as the media showed it to be. There was also the fact that the media only really showed one perspective of the mental illness, which wasn’t the actual experience of the person who suffered from it which interested me. So I wanted to look into it more and see what the reality was versus how the media portrayed it. According to Mental Health Awareness Blog, about 19% of the Adult population, 46% of teenagers, and 13% of children are affected by a type of mental illness a year. With this amount of people being affected, the right representation of mental health should be portrayed in popular culture right? With that in mind, there are so many ways for this to be implemented in a more secretive way into a movie or show that could easily blow over someone’s head or just subconsciously influence them. For example, you’ve seen people in straight jackets acting violent and hysterical in movies, and then people make it a Halloween costume, when in reality many people were tortured in insane asylums by being put in a straight jacket so they weren’t able to fight back or do anything. All of that sometimes even happened to people who were only perceived as “crazy” and/or weren’t even a little harmful.

One form of media that is more accurate and a better portrayal of mental illness is art. When talking about the media and mental illness, I believe you can’t only talk about what’s wrong but bring in a better solution or alternative for gaining information on the topic. That better alternative would be more specifically visual art, in terms of drawing, sculpting, painting, etc. In “The Connection Between Mental Illness and Creativity” by Caroline Keenan, she shows us how some famous artists actually showed some signs of mental illness through their art and since art is a form of basic self expression in a lot of cases, it is probably the most accurate source of information on their experience. Keenan says “Munch’s painting, titled Self-Portrait in Hell, is made to show his feelings on his life at the time as a man and an artist: a private hell” with the corresponding picture underneath :

-> Self-Portrait in Hell, Edvard Munch, 1903

This painting has a lot of depth to it, just not from a first glance alone. If you look and analyze it to the best of your ability, you’ll never really get a true meaning out of it, but still, you’ll get at least a feeling out of it. For example when I look at it, it’s a simple, but dark and contorted background, void of shading. While the actual self portrait is a nude, possibly meaning he feels exposed or weakened a lot. Other artists like most famously Vincent Van Gough who cut off his own ear, and made the iconic starry night while looking outside his hospital window, had suffered from mental illness that was shown in their artwork as well.

How can you or others make an impact or help reduce the stigma around mental illness? An article by Rafi Letzter called “The News Is Telling You a Distorted Story about Mental Illness” is really informative on how you might do this. Before doing this though, one of the main things to keep in mind is that mental illness is pretty common making it more normal, so normalizing it would be key to the overall goal of reducing stigma. One of Letzter’s points that really struck me was when he stated that “On the flip side, a group of researchers (including McGinty) showed in 2014 that positive stories about mentally ill people can reduce stigma and discriminatory attitudes, while increasing support for treatment” which would really help because with the right treatment they could get help and not have to suffer from their illness as much.

There are so many ways mental illness affects communities small and big, but what I would like to know is how this change will happen and how it can hopefully be normalized to the point where people won’t have to not only be affected by their mental health of which they cant control, but also won’t be affected by the media and social stigmas around it. More websites to help learn about this topic and examples of ways to help of educate [<-here->] (https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Wrj9TfKrxSYpJ7JoHiiRQ0W4q34H1Eq0yTN2Cr1VZrM/edit?usp=sharing)

This year has been really hard on all of us. During this time in quarantine, Many people have been doing so many different things to cope or to keep themselves busy to not worry too much or be bored. Some people like being inside more than others and some people even like it better than not being in quarantine, but I think for most people I know this is not the case. These past few weeks of November there have been a rise in COVID cases where I live which is scary but I understand why. I’m not saying that it’s smart or the right thing to do, but I understand where it’s coming from. I would have probably done the same thing if it weren’t for my parents (who are on the older side). I try to keep myself distracted while I’m not talking to people so I don’t get super lonely, but the things I do seem really pointless and there’s not much of a sense of fulfillment when I complete them. One of my hobbies that I do enjoy and that I do get fulfillment out of is drawing. So I decided to draw how I feel and what I do with visual images to show what It’s like for someone like me to be in quarantine. This drawing is a watercolor and pencil drawing of my room. I chose to make it a really purple theme because I think purple is a sad color, not as sad as blue but more a peaceful kind of sad. It shows how quarantine has really made me think about being alone.The yellow coming in from the window and the hanging moon are symbolic of how my sleep schedule is so messed up. My sleep schedule was never that great to begin with, but over quarantine it’s gotten so bad that I sometimes sleep during the day and am awake the whole night. I’ve heard that I am also not the only one thrown off their sleeping schedule. I believe that many people are struggling to keep pushing through quarantine and don’t have a solution yet. I don’t have that solution. But just know that there’s others who are feeling the same as me and I’m not alone in this.