I Just Want To Be Free !

“I just want to be free!”

I look around my surroundings, waterfalls, sunsets, and green grass sprouting out the ground not afraid to show its identity, unlike me, I am hiding behind my own shadows.

Birds chirping, singing me that beautiful lullaby I was never told as a child

I am tired.

I guess blue, black, and red are my favorite colors because I wear them all the time.

It started when I was 7!

To young to know right from wrong but I guess I was old enough to know pain and misery, that’s all they’ve given me was pain and misery.

“I didn’t mean it, I’m sorry!” All my life these 6 powerful words have been spit upon.  Sorrow and hurt have been stomped on, just…like… my… face.

 My parents never game a damn about me.

I was simply just a check that came through the mail.

I just want to be loved!

I stand tall like the trees, but broken down like these rocks

Fuck the rain I created these waterfalls from my tears at night.

I am an abused child.

Why am I an abused child?

No one ever told me they loved me before I laid my head down at night.

What, am I not good enough for you?

Am I only worth your anger and animosity? Bittersweet kisses planted on my cheek from your fist. I guess you love to mark your territory.

“Shit I’m doing it again!”

Constantly feeling like I’m doing something wrong but I’m the victim!

            “I just want to be free”

When I run they always find me, when I hide the lights are always being shun upon me.

                                                So here I am

Standing upon this waterfall it’s my time to go.

            No one can find me now. They would never look for someone so ugly in a place that’s so beautiful.

            I’ve only lived 17 years and though so short it feels too long I jus want be free…. and suicide seems to be the only key to that door so here I go.

 My foot loosing its grasp from the ground, eyes closed shut like the doors of freedom I am trying to open,

 I have fallen.

My last breath hits the water, my hourglass has finally ran out.

I choke, cough out my last breath, my last air bubble. It flows deeper and deeper into the water as it relays my last message to the world, “I Am Free!”