Best personal essay- Raymond Rochester


When I first listened to Eminem It was my freshman year of highschool and before that I was never huge into rap. I had a small selection of random songs that I actually liked but none of it was rap. But In highschool that all changed for me when I got into rap. Its weird how it all worked out but I got into rapping before I even Got into listening to rap.   I've been rapping for all of highschool now and actually kind of took a break last year because the way the lunches were split up so most of high school. I even made a song and is still working on some more music, not as a serious career path but for fun and as a little bit as a hobby. Even though it isn't anything serious I still like to put it out there on social media and getting feedback from people. All the feedback has been positive which is great for me. The fact that i'm just playing around a bit is pretty big for me.

At lunch It was common for the upperclassmen to host rap battles and cyphers with each other.  I seeing one of my friends hanging with them decide to go over and listen and was asked to “spit”. This being my first time ever considering rapping.  I gave rapping a a try and rapped poorley not even reaching the status of sub par on a good day. Weeks passed and after many failed attempts at spitting something actually good or remotely close to fire, I kept trying. Eventually with each attempt getting a little better and better. I soon started to spit stuff that wasn't that bad and on some occasions pretty good.  To be honest I don't exactly remember how I ran across Eminem's music but I do know he's the first Lyricist i've listened to and at his first song I instantly liked it and had a huge respect for his craft.


Im 95% sure that the first song that I listened to made by Eminem was “The Real Slim Shady” which is still one of my favorite songs and a great one to work out to. After a week and a half to 2 weeks of listing (maybe longer) I somehow found Tupac's music which not only his music stuck with me but also his image and the persona that he made for himself. With his music was my first ever look of what's considered gangsta rap.  

I first started out with Eminem which whose lyricism   grew on me very quickly and opened me up to more rappers like Tupac, Biggie, Big L, Big Pun, and other rappers of the 90ś which was known as the gangsta rap era. I also like rappers of today with a old school style such as Hopsin.  And nonstop that's all I listened to and that's still for the most part all I listen to till this day. But the more that I listened to the songs of my favorite artist, the better o a rapper I became. I was able to get a flow together to most beats, I was able to come up with anything on the spot, and people have even said when I rap I have an old school flow. Listening to people who influenced me and practice taught me how to freestyle wich also helped freestyle savage become my brand.

Eminem’s music changed my taste in music and put me on to other rappers.


Also in freshman year I have to admit it wasn't my strongest year. Although I was adjusting to highschool I did it pretty fast. But I did more joking around that focusing on my work. I had a never stress go with the flow mentality so I did not stress about grades and how much work I turned in. I still have that mentality but now but I work harder and take more pride in my grades. I definitely try harder in school and did better and better each year. I am a harder worker than I use to be and a strong work ethic is something I strive to perfect as I follow the path of what I want to do as a profession





The changes that I have made throughout high school were mostly mental changes and also a bit maturity too. High school has had changes on me that I think will last a lifetime other than friendships. The high school experience has changed my way of thinking and perception even on music part about the rapping and rappers aspect this was how My high school year has changed y life. I was introduced to Rap in my freshman year of highschool and it as had a huge impact on me from then till now and years to come. So thats how my years of high school and its huge impact that it had on mehas changed my life.


Comments (15)

Wedage DeSilva (Student 2019)
Wedage DeSilva

The approach was great, comical yet informative. Framing was well perceived in this video/essay since you were talking to the reader and the viewer (in your video). After reading your essay, I know…It's hard to overcome these struggles, but you're being brave. Being open about it and just talking about it, we're all human and we all have our own struggles in life but it's how we overcome it that matters. Along with framing, insightful reflection was used well in both parts of your benchmark. I understood your condition as you made the audience feel welcomed to both parts of your life.

Genero Accooe (Student 2019)
Genero Accooe

I learned that Raymond got into rap only a few years ago which was surprising to me as he has made an image for himself as a really good freestyler really quickly in freshman year.

Raymond's use of Insightful reflection was good as it showed the changes he's gone through. The videos humor helped a lot and even improved your claims of maturity through your composure when addressing the story.

Justin Stewart (Student 2019)
Justin Stewart

I learned that this person is really passionate about his rapping. I also learned about how he changed throughout the years. The insightful reflection was very detailed

Tyreek Speedwell (Student 2019)
Tyreek Speedwell

Reading that you weren't really into rap before is a bit hard to believe because your known for being good at that skill. I enjoyed how you broke it down with insightful reflection because we get to learn your thoughts of what it was like going through the process of getting interested into rap, being uplifted into trying it yourself, and also what it means to you after awhile. Good job!

Waverly O'Neal (Student 2019)
Waverly O'Neal

Your video was very good and I liked how it was a video of you talking about your personal experience rather than a montage of photos, it was unexpected. You did a good job of using the techniques, they were both apparent in your essay.

Alan Li (Student 2019)
Alan Li

I learned how you ended up becoming interested in the rap industry. I think you did well when it came to framing and reflecting because of how organized the essay and video were.

Amaris Ortiz (Student 2019)
Amaris Ortiz

One thing I learned from reading this essay is how you started to discover each of the different artists and how they influence you to do better in your own work. The framing and reflection were very evident throughout both the essay and video with you explaining how you have improved and what started it.

Aysha Siddiquee (Student 2019)
Aysha Siddiquee

What I learned about this person is that how passionate he really is about his rap. Their techniques did work since the insightful reflection allowed me to see what it is they learned about themselves over time and the framing played a key role as well. Over all the video was filled with humor yet informative of their own lives.

Aysha Siddiquee (Student 2019)
Aysha Siddiquee

What I learned about this person is that how passionate he really is about his rap. Their techniques did work since the insightful reflection allowed me to see what it is they learned about themselves over time and the framing played a key role as well. Over all the video was filled with humor yet informative of their own lives.

Zahira Tucker (Student 2019)
Zahira Tucker

I learned that you as a person have grown to know yourself a lot better dealing with the fact that you have this disabilities. I also saw that you are really into sports despite having to deal with not being able to remember things and that is really good because you can get through it. I believe both of your techniques worked well here.

Alexandrea Rivera (Student 2019)
Alexandrea Rivera

First off I love the editing in this video and your humor always makes me laugh and smile. Second, the framing used in the video was very good by telling everything in order to your timeline. Insightful Reflection on the video and essay when you talk about understanding how you overcame everything and changed your old ways and habits.