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Why has God forsaken me? What did I do in my past life to be treated in this way? Am I in hell? Please, God, if you’re listening, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t wave hello to stupid Ms. Jeckles. I’m sorry I didn’t pick up that most likely flea-infested dog. I don’t know what I’ve done but I’m sorry. It’s not fair, I’m a relatively good person, I should have money. (small pause) Maybe I should ask mom. Yeah. She should understand where I’m coming from. (pause) Then again, maybe not. She might get suspicious because I never call her. Ooh, I could probably text her. (pause) Maybe not, she’s always calling me disrespectful and if I text her asking for money then she will never shut up about it. (pause) In that case, then I’ll have to go meet her in person and that is way too much work. But that means that I have to call her and then she’ll probably yell at me over the ph–

(ring) Hello? (pause) Mom? (pause) What do you mean I have no emotion when I answer the phone, I have plenty of emotions. (pause) Yeah, yeah, okay, fine. Actually, it’s a good thing that you called because I have a question to ask. (pause) I swear on my life that it’s important. (pause) Can you lend me some money? (pause) Because you’re my mother and you’re supposed to pamper me. (pause) But moooooom, I’m too old to be getting up and running around like that! (pause) It doesn’t matter that I’m only twenty years old, my back says otherwise. (pause) What’s it for? (pause) Ice-cream sundaes.

(pause) Why are you yelling at me?! (pause) So what if I have money in the bank? That requires leaving the house and interacting with the nasty bank people. (pause) Mom, I barely have two pennies to rub together right now and Swanky Sundaes is really effing expensive! (pause) I do not have to act my age! (pause) Don’t “Lee, please” me, you’ve never gone through what I’m going through right now! (pause) Mom, you don’t understand. Listen, waiting in line for ice-cream sundaes is fun. Waiting in line at the bank isn’t. (pause) What kind of question is that? Of course I have to go to Swanky Sundaes, where else would I get high quality ice-cream sundaes? (pause) Ew, Pete’s only has like three flavors.

Yes Mom! I’ll clean up that pile! Yes, I know that those papers have been sitting there for forever! (confused) I’m not talking back, I’m just agreeing? Okayyyyyyyyy I’ll do it now.

(Picks up pile of papers and sifts through, stopping on a pink card.)

Trash, trash, trash…

Huh, I remember this birthday card, one of the cute ones with the cutouts of our family. Grandma used to send these cutesy cards covered with pictures of her, me, and… Bill.

Your official title is now “Ex-Step-not really related-married in-grandpa”, my mother insists, coaxing a sad smile out of grandma. But I don't say that! You were always just grandpa Beale to me. You rolled your eyes and called us silly little kids when my sister and I pronounced Grandpa Bill- Grandpa Beale, Beale- a weird, twangy word. Some strange cross between, like, bean and whale, clearly the handiwork of small children, but to us it meant love. You know that, right?

You aren’t welcome in our picture frames anymore though. My mom scoffs at your name. I don’t really remember why you aren’t Grandpa Beale anymore. Something about lies, for some 3 years, something about stealing, something about money. I don’t know. I don’t ask anymore, at least not after I heard what Grandma said last year. It was Christmas eve at about 10 o’clock, that meant I was up late cause I was only 10. I heard voices from the other side of the house. I tiptoed through the connecting hallway to the guest room, but paused with my hand on the doorknob as I heard the whispers of a forbidden phone conversation. She was talking to you, just like old times, leaning on her pillows, a faint light from her kindle. I dropped my hand but she heard me, let me in, and knew I understood. “I miss Bill,” I said. “I miss him too,” she attempted at a smile. Her thinning lips left crisscrossing stains of lipstick across her front teeth, it was nothing like the full smiles of my childhood, when you were welcome in the picture frames.

You were my grandpa Beale when you taught me how to push the bike pedals back and get back up onto the driveway. Grandpa Beale liked cold bud lights in the ugly blue cans and watching golf in the sunroom. I can still remember the playful banter as I insisted golf wasn’t really a sport, flicking the light switch back and forth on your commemorative golf club lamp from the adjacent chair. You didn't force me to go to mass like (sarcastic sophisticated voice) Grandfather Douglass, instead you always listened, entertaining my thoughts with your big smile. (Sigh) I miss that.

Grandma always told me your smoking would be the end of your marriage. I laughed and playfully coughed in your direction. I thought it could never end.

I still have that Facebook link open on my phone, “Happy Birthday Sofia! I love you!” from months ago. I knew you wouldn't forget! I wish I had replied… I love you too Beale. Even if my mother hates you for lying to us. She doesn’t see my side. Even if I don't understand why we can't move on and still be family.

(looks up)

“Here kid, take this.” That’s what he said as he handed me the gun. I had never had one in my hand before, the long barrel and extended clip for bullets went down to my knees. What am I supposed to do with this?

“You got two options kid, use it on yourself or use it on someone else, regardless I couldn’t care less.¨ The man was tall and had a cold expression that freaked me out.

I had no idea what to say to the man, so I took the gun from him. Why would I want to take my life with the gun? Why would anyone ever do that? The scary man must be joking and playing a trick on me.

I had been home in bed with my mommy, listening to her great stories only a day ago. This makes me want to break down and give up, but I knew I had to be strong for my family. Yesterday three men came to my house and talked to my mom as I ran around the backyard with my little sister. By the time they were finished talking mommy was crying. The guys then grabbed my shoulder and pointed me to an old rusty truck. Mom took my hand and told me these men were gonna take me to a place where all boys go when they reach the age of 13, but I knew by the markings on the truck they were soldiers. She told me things had changed. She said our home was in a war and they needed little boys like me to help out. I must go, I had to be the brave strong man she knew me to be, she said, as she began to cry. The men stepped in and told me I had to leave now, but my mom would not let go of me. One of the men hit her so hard she fell onto the dirt driveway. I began to scream along with my sister. I remember the men picking me up and carrying me to the car. My last glance of my family was from the back of the truck, mommy was lying in the dirt with her hand extended in my direction, I didn’t want this to be goodbye.

Now I’m here, a dark damp cellar full of sandbags and men.Mister, who will I be fighting against? How long will it be until I can see my mom? The soldier gave me an angry glare. I hope the men do not think I have the ability to really kill another person. I become heartbroken, heartbroken at the world. I think to myself, all war has done is destroy my family. Why should I do anything for these men? I see a bright shiny medal on a man's coat jacket. Why would someone want to win a medal for killing another person? I shouldn’t be here, maybe the army guys got the wrong kid. There are plenty of boys much older than me that are stronger and better, than me. They could just do my job and I could go home and see my little sister and mom once again.  

Just because someone has a lot of money or power doesn’t mean they should be above the law, sir. No one is above the law.

(Dialogue Pause)

I don’t care. He has committed two different crimes, murder and corruption, both of which deserve a long prison sentence, if not the death penalty. Sir, we know he did this. He abuses his own power, to try and get even more power, which in itself would get him in prison for a while, and then orders the death of not one but two people to cover it up. Even our leader would be happy to know that one of his advisor is trying to seize power from him.  

(Dialogue Pause)

We have the evidence, sir. We have the hitmen, all of whom have confessed to be hired by this guy. We even have obtained emails between our suspect and one of his own advisors talking about their plan. We have all the evidence we would need to arrest a regular citizen. But, because of his wealth and power, we have a different situation. We know that a reason he carried out his plan was because he knows that he had some protection. He knew that maybe his position would give him an advantage and would give him more time to hide his tracks. Now that has backfired. This reason makes him an even more likely suspect. Not a suspect, a criminal. Sir, we know what he did. We have a motive, and evidence that supports the motive and him as a criminal. The only thing that is preventing us now is his position.

(Non Dialogue Pause)

He’s also my brother-in-law.

(Non Dialogue Pause)

If only this criminal wasn’t part of my family. (Anguished scream) Why couldn’t this be anyone else. ANYONE! (Sigh) So I have to choose. My family, or my career. My family, or the law.

(Dialogue Pause)

He’s very respected within the family. Anyone of his position would be respected greatly. When he first came into the family, I too respected him. I admired him. But after uncovering this, I have lost all of my respect for him. As I see things, no one else knows about this. Not even his wife. And most of all, if they found out that I was accusing him of corruption and murder, man, you can’t imagine the backlash I would get. I would no longer be invited to family gatherings, I would probably be kicked out. Yes, I’m not exaggerating. That’s how much they love him. He brings great respect to my family. If people realized he got arrested, then everyone in my family would be rejected. They would become outcasts. And again, my family would blame that on me. And then I would be the outcast of the outcasts.

(Dialogue Pause)

I know sir. Eventually I have to choose.

(Dialogue Pause)

Yes, life will go on. The world won’t stop moving.

(Dialogue Pause)

That’s a good point, sir. Once my family got over their bias, and saw the truth, I would be worshipped. I would be praised. I would get the respect that he got. I would be admired. But, I still need a plan. A marvelous plan. A spectacular plan.

(Non Dialogue Pause)

What if we set him up? What if we caused him to think that he was being uncovered, and we got him to think that doing this one thing would get him out of that. We could catch him in the act. Maybe I could even set it up so that my family is there to see his wrongdoing. I could solve two things at once.

(Non Dialogue Pause)

I don’t know. Everyone would probably dismiss anything. I would still be rejected by my family, too. I guess there’s no way around that, if I decide to carry out my plan and arrest this idiot.

(Non Dialogue Pause)

In the beginning of my slide creation, I changed my background to some dark grayscales. This was so my color of words would contrast and not blend in. I also used the certain peach colors to compliment my banner. I changed the size of my words so that they were no too big  but not too small either. The font or shape of my words were chosen to enforce the calm and smooth effect that my leaves intended to give off, in my banner. I decided to place TYAH largely in the center. After all, I am the center focus of this slide. I named the two things I care for the most. I love pizza and my passion, it is a soul part of me, art.

I focused more on “glance media.” This is why I have creative colors for the text and the background of the slide. There were many colors added, mainly bright, but I tried not to add too much and stick to a theme of colors. Also, I focused on the “text aids” so that the text is visible and clear. I made the words big enough to see so that the audience won’t struggle and ignore it. Most of the words were bigger than 40 in font size in. I sticked to “one slide and one point” by not adding so much information that’ll make it boring. "Contrast" was most important for my slide. There were certain words I made bigger than others because they were the key points of the slide. It gave the slide more emotion and excite by making some words bigger than the rest.

5 min of Science: Sharks, Snakes, and Spiders

For my 5 minutes of science presentation I decided to focus on the fear we have of certain animals, why we have them, and how they negatively impact our society. I came up with this topic after thinking about when we learned why people think babies are cute. Humans are programmed to think certain traits like big eyes, small noses, and mouths are cute compared to the opposite of those traits. If we know why humans think certain things are cute then when do they think certain things are scary?

I specifically focused on sharks, spiders, and snakes which are three animals that many people fear and even have phobias of. Many species of sharks, for example, are top of the food chain predators with razor sharp teeth and a lust for blood. It’s pretty easy to imagine why someone would be scared of an animal like this because of how dangerous they appear, but they really aren’t at all. Sharks on Average kill 10 people per year and statistically people have a 1 in 3,748,067 chance of getting bitten by a shark according to the University of Florida's Museum of Natural History. Compare this to an estimated 100 million sharks who are killed annually by humans due to overfishing, and bycatch according to the World Wildlife Organization. Snakes are another commonly feared animal which have a 1 in 35,700 chance of biting a person in the U.S. and a 1 in 50 million chance of killing them. Although they do kill and injure more people than sharks, snakes are still apart of a billion dollar snakeskin industry because of humans. Lastly, spiders are one of people's biggest phobias, but on average only kill 6.5 people per year. As you can see these animals kill few too many people for us to be afraid of them.

According to David Ropeik of Harvard University, the reason people are afraid of sharks isn’t because of how many people die, but because of how terrible a death it would be to get eaten alive by a shark. Movies and media like Jaws, Sharknado, and Shark week all base their entertainment off of the grizzly deaths of humans which show sharks as evil killing machines. When we see these depictions of sharks everywhere we actually think this is how we could die if we ran into one even though it is very unlikely. Ropeik also says that humans are hardwired to feel first and think second which is why they are scared of sharks. We also use mental shortcuts like the availability heuristic which uses recent information to make a decision. People jump to conclusions before figuring out a situation, so if something brushes up against your leg in the water you will assume the worst.

When it comes to snakes and spiders we fear them because we are programmed to. Like babies and puppies have features that we think are cute, snakes and spiders have features that we think are the opposite. For example, the number of legs an animal legs is a feature people judge. Spiders have 8 legs while snakes have none and as a result both are thought of as both scary and disgusting. Another reason we are afraid of snakes is because we as a humans have evolved to fear snacks in order to survive and reproduce. Researchers from The Academy of Natural Sciences have found that some neurons in the brain only respond to legless animals. This means people are easily able to spot a snakes compared to other objects surrounding them. This results in a fear and paranoia of snakes because we are more aware of them compared to other animals/objects.

The reason our fear of certain animals matters to our society is because of the result it may have on us. Unfortunately, many animals are becoming endangered and even extinct because of climate change, poaching, deforestation, and overall killing of animals. As I said before sharks are being killed by the millions every year. We do not know how many are left because of the little information we have on the ocean, but they could possibly be endangered. It’s easy not to care about a predator like shark, but the fact is that they are very important to our ecosystem. Since some of them are top of the food chain predators they are able to keep the ecosystem in balance by eating both prey and smaller predators. If enough sharks die the ocean’s ecosystem will suffer due to overpopulation of other animals. Snakes are also being killed by the snakeskin industry which us them for purses, bags, shoes, belts, etc. The killing of these animals and misconceptions we teach others will contribute to poor ecosystem, and will ruin our environment even more. We need to stop fearing creatures that should really be afraid of us.

Sharks are one my favorite animals so this topic was very important to me because I think it’s unfair how we label them as dangerous. Some of them, like the whale shark, don’t even eat meat and even the ones that do are still not a threat to humans. I can still understand why someone would be scared of a shark, especially someone who has been attacked before. Spiders on the other hand I am very scared of, especially for their legs. Despite my fear, I still think they shouldn’t be labeled as dangerous because of the low number of people they kill and the good they do for the ecosystem. All animals and organisms are an important part of our ecosystem and play a part in keeping it in balance, so I think it’s a bad idea to teach people certain ones are “dangerous”.

Sources

Andrew, E. (2016). Why Are We Afraid Of Spiders? Retrieved November 09, 2016, from http://www.iflscience.com/brain/why-are-we-afraid-spiders/

Shark. (n.d.). Retrieved November 09, 2016, from https://www.worldwildlife.org/species/shark

Moskowitz, C. (n.d.). Why We Fear Snakes - Live Science. Retrieved November 9, 2016, from http://www.livescience.com/2348-fear-snakes.html

Zimmer, C. (2013, October 31). Afraid of Snakes? Your Pulvinar May Be to Blame - The New ... Retrieved November 9, 2016, from http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/31/science/afraid-of-snakes-your-pulvinar-may-be-to-blame.html

Palermo, E. (2015, July 16). Why Are People So Afraid of Sharks? - Live Science. Retrieved November 9, 2016, from http://www.livescience.com/51579-fear-of-sharks-psychology.html

5 Reasons to Revere, Not Fear, the Shark. (2016). Retrieved November 09, 2016, from http://ocean.si.edu/ocean-news/5-reasons-revere-not-fear-shark

(n.d.). Retrieved November 10, 2016, from http://ufwildlife.ifas.ufl.edu/venomous_snake_faqs.shtml

As an inquiry-based school, SLA believes in asking questions, challenging assumptions, and working together to better understand each other and the world.

We are a diverse group, and we embrace every member of our community, regardless of their identity.

We also refuse to insult, threaten, exclude, disempower, or vilify others based on who they are or what they think.

Instead, we listen before we speak. We see each other as complex individuals, not stereotypes. We protect and defend each other when needed. And when we disagree, we treat each other with decency.

To us, that is the ethic of care. We will continue to work and act in this way, each and every day that we walk through these doors.

Most importantly, we believe in you, our students -- your ideas, your passion, and your ability to make the world a better place. Today, like every day, we hold out our hope that you strive to do just that.

Love,

The educators of Science Leadership Academy

As a writer this helped me reralize that everyone learns different and the self set goals we make for others and ourselves.

“Proficient literacy”

In the warm brown fluorescently lit dining room, with stacks of textbooks and papers. My brother was across from me getting really frustrated doing his english homework after flying through math, while I was kind of the opposite. The three lined cinnamon apple candles flickered in the middle of the table covered with green lining; their smell was masked by the smell of arroz y gandules and pastellios, not to mention the delicious smell of the sofrito my mom had made to use in these things, freshly cut cilantro and peppers, among many other ingredients. I was trying to finish my shape, multiplication and identifying rays and lines so I can go in the kitchen and help because i love the smell of the “classic Puerto Rican food” that most people thing we eat everyday, while i glanced towards the kitchen to make sure she wasn’t done I noticed my brother enticed by the flickering of the candle as he held his paper closer and closer until it caught fire. He threw it on the table and my mom came rushing over smacking with her cooking mitts.

“I am sick of this bull shit she stated, Tati go get the children's

Dictionary”. “Okay” I responded not knowing why her anger was directed to me. She took the book and flopped it on the now charred table-cloth and paper. “Flip and point to anyone” she said, I flipped a few paged and pointed to car. “Matt say that word”, struggling I saw his mouth reform over and again, “fars” he said. Frustrated, but trying to calm she said “Okay, it takes practice you can’t try to hide or destroy your homework every time it get’s too hard, c makes the ka sound” At that moment, I realize my mom wasn’t going to let my brothers disability get in the way of him learning. It was weird to see her have to teach him different and that he didn’t learn the way most people did, I didn’t know why I even assumed he was supposed to learn like me.

People often define for themselves what is proficient literacy, but what is to one, isn’t the same to another. In most cases, figures of authority determine the definition of proficient literacy and hold every person learning from them to that specific standard. As, Mark Rose said, in ‘I just want to be average’,  “Students will float to the mark you set” which is true, like in the class he was mistakenly in the standard’s were set low, but if you set them high you’ll get someone willing to work. Setting individual goals of learning is more important than setting a set in stone mark for everyone, to reach at a certain time. My mothers definition of proficiency was different for my brother and I.  She knew the difference and she knew we couldn't learn the same.  My brother had set a low mark for himself, however my Mom set one way above what he thought was capable of, helping him float to the mark realizing a mark set was temporary and changeable.

Again, when the ‘students’ are expected to do the minimum by the ‘edler’, ‘wiser’ person people can become discouraged and Like in How to Tame a Wild Tongue. Gloria Anzaldua said “when not copping out we know that we are more than nothing.” Which took me back to the look on my brothers face a month after my mom pulled out that dictionary and word slipped and skidded off his tongue with ease, no fighting with the letters and vowels and I saw confidence. In this moment my brother knew what he was capable of more on literacy, he knew he could advance and understand if he tried. Self exploration with a push is important of the beginnings of literacy.

Sometimes, when we let the learner, reader, the student find and indulge in literacy themselves, we  allow for, that ‘proficiency’. Like in How Changing Your Reading Habits Can Transform Your Health stated, "We use challenges a lot in our work, because they give you something tangible to aim for and a sense of achievement once you’ve completed them. It can help you develop your skills, or help you discover something new," says Wilkinson; this goal setting system is an idea that can be in ones thoughts. However this is a self defined achievement, which has nothing to do with cultural capital, but every indivisual persons ambition and self defining proficient literacy.

Although figures of authority often decide on, what is the ‘standard’ for proficient literacy, it is important that once one begins to explore literacy in the simplest form. With time comes the understanding of code-switching and the belief of ‘cultural capital’ however with the fundamentals of literacy it is just a person testing the limits and floating to the marks the authoritative teaching figures set for the  learning students. As long as students can meet the glorious feeling of  being literate  they will crave full literacy and raise their previously sets of proficient literacy.

This quarter, I made this ceiling tile. It’s based off of a “spray” from Overwatch, a video game. It’s of my favourite character, and the one i play the most, Junkrat. It’s kind of a grenade, I think? And it’s my favourite spray of his, so I thought it’d be really cool to remake it and be able to leave it behind in the school once I’d left. I really think people should play/appreciate Overwatch, and I think this is a good start.