There were times when everything almost seemed ok, and there were
times when everything seemed lost. It was around one of those times
when everything seemed lost, and that’s why I didn’t kill john for
waking me up. Its not that I didn’t like his idea, but it was not
something I should have been woken up for, its hard enough trying to
fall asleep let alone going back to it.
After i
jumped up with my gun and went into another section of the store with
him, he quickly explained what he wanted with me “ its almost
Christmas, and we don’t have a tree, or anything. I think after all we
have been through we deserve a good Christmas.”
I
stared at him for a moment not really believing what he was asking me.
I almost laughed but held it in. “john are you ok?” I knew he was
serious so I didn’t even bother to ask.
“yes,…well
no..but that’s the point no one is really “ok”…. after we all saw ant
and ally die….and then Nicole…that could have been any of us….
something died in all of us.”
Pain came into my
thoughts as he said the word Nicole, I nodded “we all felt it john, the
odd indescribable feeling, like we lost part of our selfs.” I thought
for a second and considered a Christmas in this place. It would be
nice. “ok whats the plan to make this work?”
“fade
and gannon the cannon, they have been out there for a while, they know
how to live out there, and they agreed to help us, only us four know
about it.” I nodded. So far it seemed like a good idea, no one would
argue that gannon and fade kick ass.
“how do we know what to get people?”
“ask, no one would actually expect anything, so just ask
hypothetically” I nodded, this would work somehow, john was right. We
needed to spread joy around here.
Over the next few days we all get ready for going out, we asked people casually what they wanted.
I almost cried when Eve and Dan both asked to see Dad, I did not know
what to do. I think deep down they understood, but refused to believe
their feelings “im sorry, but I don’t think dads going to make it this
year” I told them they complained but they stopped when they saw my
eyes starting to tear. They both hugged me.
After a
few days of, me and john, just asking everyone what they want we
decided that we were ready. “a lot of sad answers, things we can’t
actually get them”
we both had to ask our friends
what they wanted, and we both got answers that upset us. It was still a
while before Christmas, about a week and a half, but we wanted to get
the shopping done early. The plan was that we would be ready in two
days, we would all have different weapons, although fade insisted on
using his sword, because it did not run out of ammo, and no one argued,
after all he had a point. We all met in the weapons storage section of
the store, where are the unused weapons were being used. Gannon still
had his glock 18, and happily found another one and loaded up on a lot
of clips, John picked up a Simi-automatic rifle with a small scope,
probably an acog I didn’t really look at it well enough, and of course
his side arm, a glock 19. I wanted to use a shotgun, I grabbed a 20
gauge , figuring the 12 gauge would be too heavy, and there is only a
slight difference in killing power. And of course my dads glock 19 with
two clips.
“damn, it would be fun to be using a
world war two weapon now” I said out loud as I was viewing all the
different rifles.
“world war two?” Gannon asked curiously hearing this
“yeah, its my favorite war…I was a war buff before the zombies” he looked at me and smirked
“yeah, but that’s all teenage boys these days, I know I was…but world war two huh? That’s interesting”
Caleb Marcs - A young adult, who works as the Assistant Secretary of State for Democracy, Human Rights, and Labour the State Department, living in the times of one of the greatest economic downturns of the nation’s history (2007-2010), and struggling to stay afloat with his wife and friends, as well as dealing with the massive affects the recession has on global human rights.
Michelle Marcs - Caleb's wife.
Timothy Grey - One of Caleb Marc's "business associates".
Our main character, CALEB, is sitting at his desk. He’s talking on the telephone.
He’s writing and typing away, busy at work. There are two phones on the opposite sides of his desk. He works and works for a few moments, until one of his phones begins to ring. He picks it up and answers.
CALEB
Hello. Assistant Secretary Caleb Marcs speaking (pauses) Umm, uh, no. I’m not too busy (pauses).
He puts his pen down and focuses on the phone call.
CALEB (cont’d)
(laughs) Yeah, yeah, it’s-it’s crazy here. The recession is, uh, it’s really getting to us (pauses) Well, uh, well yeah. (pauses) No, no, here in the State Department we’re, uh, we’re completely topped. Funding’s gone heywire (pauses) What, huh? No, no, I, uh, I don’t watch the news anymore (pauses) Well, uh, I don’t watch the news that much anymore (pauses) Why? Because all I get is FOX News now (pauses) No, no, I just watch Jon Stewart for all of that (pauses) Wait, huh? What story? About what? (pauses) Ok, ok, I’ll, uh, I’ll read the report online.
He puts the phone on his desk, not hanging it up. He pulls out a laptop and types for some moments. After a while, he picks up the phone again, his voice fearful.
CALEB (cont’d)
Is any of this stuff accurate? (pauses) Well is it!? (pauses) No, no. I’m sorry. I just have to be sure. (pauses) This can’t be true. Do you know what this would mean if this was true? (pauses) Yes, yes, I uh, understand. (pauses) I understand. Thanks for the call.
He hangs up the phone. He walks over to the front of his desk and sits down. He sighs.
CALEB (cont’d)
This can’t be true.
END OF MONOLOGUE.
Monologue #2
Act 1. Scene 2
INT., STATE DEPARTMENT OFFICE - DAY
CALEB is in his office again. There are papers everywhere. On the ground, all over his desk. There is a stack of papers that are holding up one of his phones. The phones continue to ring off the hook. He walks in from stage left, with his coat on, coffee in one hand, and a briefcase in the other, making it clear that he just came in for the day. He hears the two phones ringing and looks at them for a moment.
CALEB
Meh.
He ignores both phones. He takes off his coat, and sits at his desk. After a while, he becomes so annoyed with his phones that he unplugs both of them. He sits and his desk and writes at his desk for some moments. As he works, his phone vibrates in his pocket, he pulls it out of his Blackberry out of his pocket. He doesn’t even bother to look at the screen.
CALEB (cont’d)
A Blackberry call is a work call.
He doesn’t hesitate to promptly throw his phone into his wastebasket. He gets back to silent work for some moments. After a while, another phone vibrates in his pocket. He pulls this phone out quickly and worriedly.
CALEB (cont’d)
But an iPhone call is important.
CALEB pulls out the phone and talks to his wife.
CALEB (cont’d)
Hey, honey. (pauses) Yeah, I’m at work. (pauses) I know, I know. (pauses) Listen, listen. I understand why you’re angry. (pauses) Listen, listen, please listen to me. I’m sorry, ok? I’m sorry from keeping that from you. (pauses) Why? Why? I don’t know why. I can’t understand why. I honestly don’t know why I lied to you. (pauses) All I can tell you is that I’m sorry.
END OF MONOLOGUE.
Monologue #3
Act 1. Scene 3.
INT., THE MARCS’ HOME - DAY
MICHELLE Marcs, CALEB’s wife, is in their home. She is in the living room of their home, which is messy. She is dressed in pajamas, somewhat sloppily. She is eating cereal from the box while sitting on her sofa, watching TV. The phone rings, and she has to look for it for a few moments. She finds it after a while, and she answers the phone.
MICHELLE
Hello? (pauses) Oh, hi mother. (pauses) No, no, I’m not dressed yet. (pauses) Well it’s only (looks at a clock next to her) 11 o’clock? Jesus. (pauses) Oh well I lost track of time, mother! (pauses) Oh, well he left for work already. (pauses) Well, uh, not quite. Actually, do you have a minute to talk? (pauses) Yes, well, it’s been pretty tough for the country lately, you know, and a lot of people are out of work and losing jobs because of the economy. (pauses) Well it turns out a lot of people are dying, too. (pauses) This economy is affecting human rights all over the world. (pauses) Well with no money, mom, the government can’t afford all of the foreign programs and things like that, a lot of which actually keep people alive. (pauses) Oh, that’s terrible, isn’t it? (pauses) Oh, he’s distraught. Absolutely distraught. He’s, he’s really getting into this. (pauses) Well, that’s the thing, mother. He’s getting a little too into this. (pauses) Well I’m afraid he’s begun to take matters into his own hands.
END OF MONOLOGUE.
Monologue #4
Act 1. Scene 4.
INT., STATE DEPARTMENT OFFICE - DAY
CALEB walks into his office. He leaves the door open, he is yelling out of it.
CALEB
And you tell him, Dan, that if goes through, it’ll be your ass that suffers for it! (pauses) Yeah, that’s right, your ass!
He firmly closes the door. He walks over to his desk, but before he’s able to sit down, he receives a call.
CALEB (cont’d)
Assistant Secretary speaking. (pauses) Yes, may I, uh, may I inquire whose calling? (pauses) Oh, oh, great, great. How’s it going, Tim? (pauses) Good, good, that’s great. (pauses) Now, uh, now listen. This is very important and I don’t want this message to be forgotten. (pauses) Also, I would like all of this to remain between you, I, and any third party I may bring in in the future. (pauses) No, no, Tim. Rest assured that we will be doing nothing against the law, or too against the law, rather. It’s just too sensitive of information to be common knowledge. (pauses) Ok, ok, now listen up. I don’t quite know you well, but I am a good judge of character, and I can only assume and hope that you are not a cold-hearted man. (pauses) Oh, well I guessed right. (pauses) Now, thousands of people are dying now, so there needs to be no slip ups.
END OF MONOLOGUE.
Monologue #5
Act 1. Scene 5.
INT., TIMOTHY GREY’S OFFICE - DAY
TIMOTHY Grey is our new character. He is a member of the executive branch of government. Working in the confides of the White House, he holds important power. Timothy walks into his office, a stark contrast of CALEB’s as it’s much larger and tidier. He also has an assistant, who does not speak.
TIMOTHY
It appears that Mr. Marcs knows a bit more than he should, unfortunately. If he thinks he can change the world, he’s sadly mistaken. Now surely, I’m not happy about what’s going on, but what can I do? I’m just one man, but furthermore, a man who knows his appropriate place in
society.
TIMOTHY pauses, as he sits at his desk. He swiftly rests his feet on his desk surface, looking calm and confident.
TIMOTHY (cont’d)
Mr. Marcs. Caleb, Marcs. A very foolish man indeed.
He looks down at his desk, in which his phone is resting, and notices a call.
TIMOTHY (cont’d)
Ah, (looks at his phone), it appears it that’s Mr. Marcs now. (TIMOTHY answers his phone) Mr. Marcs, how are you? (pauses) No, no, not yet, there are many things we have to do before we get to that point, Mr. Marcs. (pauses) It would suppose so, now wouldn’t it? (pauses)
So this project is mainly about
modernization. The issue with people these days is that we believe if a place
doesn't have wifi or the latest iPhone that we need to fix them and make them
like us. A place that modernization hit hard is Ladakh. Ladakh was once this
peaceful place that kept quiet and away from the outside world in Tibet, but
then we moved ourselves in. Except for making it better we made their little
place worse and worse… So thats practically my project.
Ablae Angmo- Is a man around the age of 32, he is
against the westernization, km he is a very confused man and loves to allow his
points to get through to everyone that he believes matter and why he thinks
everyone should follow his lead. He is about 5’4” and he wears only hand made
clothes, which his wife Reni has made. He lives far from the Ladakh now
culture. He walks miles away form his home to go get some clean water. He is
frustrated, very angry, and finding a lot of things funny
Francis Angmo- His Wife- A quiet woman, very soft
spoken. Doesn’t agree with her husband at all. She believes he is just going
through a mid life crisis and just hates change. The move is driving her family
apart.
Taylor Angmo- His Daughter- Frustrated at her
parents that she had to lose all of her friends and move away. She is a loud
mouth back talking teenager. Westernization started changing her as well as
Ladakh. She is 17 and when she turns 18(soon) she plans to run away from her
father’s rules. She argues with her father constantly and completely ignores
her mother
Damian Angmo- His Son- Quiet seven-year-old
child. Very respectable but very curious. He is not as spoiled as his older
sister, he’s confused about the move but doesn’t say much to the family. He
keeps to himself in a little room in their current home.
Jacob Angmo- His Brother- Ablaes older brother;
Very strict and is not accepting westernization. He is not a stubborn as his
little brother he’d rather
(Ablae is pacing outside and he seems ticked off
about something. He’s acting like he is doing something productive but really
he is not. He secretly is watching his wife making sure that she is fine and
keeping watch outside for no outsiders. Then a camera crew comes up, asking him
questions.)
(Beginning)
Yeah, I believe I can talk to someone... How
personal is this going to get... Well I'm not willing get personal... my
opinion.. Yeah of course I can share that... I don’t understand why every time
something happens they believe we need the fixing.. Fixing what, what’s wrong
with the way we chose to live our lives.. We were pure and educated the way we
were... Explain?... See when we first started out Ladakh was the most beautiful
place ever. No one and I mean no one threw trash anywhere. The water was
purified and clean. The land oh was it so clean... The dirt we could eat our
food off of it... When i lived there I was your regular Ladakh farmer... A
wife, children, beautiful home, nothing would've been better then this... When
people in other country thought of our Ladakh as a undeveloped place which all
children lived in rags and such is when westernization started taking place...
In my eyes westernization is the change of my world and my cultures world into
something so horrid the gods probably turned their heads and no longer look
down upon us. First, came the
people, lined one by one like we were a circus. Then came the workers the
builders, then after they started coming is when we started… well I started
packing.. Stay? Why would I stay there… they meant to make us better?… if
ruining the way people do everything and polluting our land is called making us
better then yes they made us very better… I'm not stubborn… I don't understand
what they're doing… no I don’t really know any background from what there
doing.. I know they came out of nowhere...but... know what you just don't
understand me!… I think this interview is over.. Good-bye to you
Act
I Scene II
Francis Angmo
(Wife is sitting in a chair with a handful of
laundry. She is humming a beautiful song while folding clothes.)
He’s such a reactive person.. I loved Ladakh, a
place of fun and family... Yeah I agree with that we were different before they
came... Transportation and people too... No not all are bad things, well not
all of the things... Of course I still want to go back, it’s so quiet out here
at night and I dearly miss my family... Well the move really wasn’t my choice..
He’s the man.. Well in my culture we follow what the males orders are.. Yeah,
there the leaders of the pack, when he dies Damian will be the leader... I just
wish things would go back to where they were I want to go home...it effects me because
no one has been the same since after the move.. All the kids changed.. They
don't even talk to us anymore... Forgiveness?... They don’t want to forgive
us.. No I don’t think it was I... Yeah.... My husband... He’s real stubborn..
He never lets our family have fun anymore... He’s so different now... He thinks
were going to turn on him and leave... I don’t understand... Yeah well … I
don’t think... No why would you... well good he needs to know what was said.. I
personally think westernization isn’t that bad.. I talk to my sister... through
mail.. We talk about all the changes.. They’re waiting for us to come on back
home
Act I Scene III
Damian Angmo
(Sitting in his room alone, little Damian no
older then seven. He’s playing with some kind of doll singing quietly to
himself sitting on the floor. He notices the door creak open he drops his stuff
and slowly turns around, almost frightened)
..He..Hello... my name’s Damian.. Ye..yeah ..
Nice to meet you... may I ask why your here... oh int....
(sounds it out)
in-ter- view.. Okay.. I’m fine
with it... old?. I.. I’m not old... oh my age seven in two eighths.. Yeah I’ll
be eight soon.. How “ool..ld” are you.. That’s pretty old Mr... I don’t
think... oh why am I here?.... I don’t feel comfortable...around...them..They...aren’t
the same... my dads always grumpy.. Tayy doesn’t play any games anymore.. We
use to play everything... tag, duck duck goose, hide and go seek... We use to
play at this park type of thing..Well mines were really nice..We lived around a
lot of family friends and stuff... I do miss my old home..i didn’t have that
many friends... they all thought i was weird.. i’m not that talkative... i
just..get nervous around big crowds... i’m afraid they might hurt me.. or judge
me... no i’m not self con-sc-i-ence... my mom said it meant confident...
confidence is like liking yourself a lot... it’s not.. oh, that’s cool i
guess... mothers been stressed... she’s worried about my father..westernization
just changed the whole town...we were independent but then the people came and
yeah..
(mother calls him to dinner)
I’m sorrry.. I have to go eat, but we’ll finish talking some
other time
Act
I Scene IIII
Taylor Angmo
(Taylor is dancing in her room to this new song
that her friend had told her about, she seems like an outgoing nice person
until she hears a knock on her door. Her whole demeanor changes and she goes to
looking annoyed and starts to turn a light red color. She answers her door and
notices it is not anyone from her family then her mood changes back to that
nice, outgoing way.)
Hello
(She says with a smile)
I’m Taylor and you guys are?.. Nice to meet you..
Interview? Sure, I wouldn’t mind that at all... I’m Seventeen.. Weeellllll I
love Ladakh... Yup, born and raised
(she grins with pride)
My mother tells me westernization is to help our
beautiful Ladakh, my father thinks other wise.. He thinks that westernization
is something to ruin Ladakh. He thinks the people are messing up our pride
lands and angering our gods. I think other wise, i think westernization is
adding more fun to our plan old boring Ladakh. Yeah i loved it there but i
always wanted more. I had always wanted that extra push, something to keep us
in contact with the outside world... Well we were “isolated” but come on you hear
things people travel sometimes people write to other people... We were modern
but not as “modern” that everyone else in the world was.. I love when i see Ladakh now, they have
eevveerryytthhiinngg!... No, Where’s America?.. Wow that’s pretty far... Nope i
never seen or heard anything about them.. Wow really?.. All day shopping and no
curfew?? i would love that so much!
(At part since Taylor only has
a few months to count as a child in America the interviewers are trying to
persuade her to go back with them after they leave their voyage through the
culture of Ladakh).
I
don’t think my parents would let me go that far... In Ladakh we all stay close
to our families... Yeah even through marriage, I know that is a lot... well I
dont mind my culture its just I need more to make me feel complete...my family
is annoying now..its like she agrees with his choice...she would say
that...damian? Hes fine I guess...i dont really find time for him
anymore...I've just been really pissed...at night... yeah, sometimes I sneak
out go back to Ladakh...all my friends are there... i just wanted to see them..
When i go there they catch me up on the news.. Yeah like whats new, what’s in
style and things like that.. if my
parents found out they would probably be really angry... yeah, i bet my dad
would be on ground duty more, he probably would watch everything i do at every
time of the day... My dads getting old, he wont be able to walk soon. He’s
already having problems walking now... I figure that after a while he’ll just
give up and let us do what ever we want... I think my family should be out of
the eating area by now.. yeah, i’m really hungry.. would you guys like
something to eat i’ll bring you something... no? okay well i’m going to sneak
some food, are you guys staying?.. okay i’ll show you guys out i guess
(walks towards the front of the home and lets the
visitors out)
Bye
you guys
(she smiles then walks away)
(After Visitors Leave)
Hopefully
no one finds out what i told them. I think i said too much. That was so stupid,
what if they go and tell my father what i said. I would really be in big
trouble. When they asked me to go with them to this America place i was the
most terrified. Isn’t against some law that they cant offer to take people from
their homes. That whole conversation got me really lost. ;
Act II Scene I
Ablae Angmo
(Ablae is ranting because he has just found that
Taylor has eaten again after the family has been off to bed. In Ablae’s house
he had clearly stated that they eat as a family or they do not eat at all, and
Taylor broken this rule. This is not the first time, but it is the first time
Ablae is going to settle this problem.)
She’s been here, i know she had to been. Nothing
seems to be in place now; she snuck our food again too didn’t she. I’m getting
sick and tired of her and her restraint against the house rules. I need to
protect my family and she is going against everything that will help her grow
and prosper to a great and intelligent young woman. I need to set a limit and
it stops here. Going to her and telling her what’s going to happen is the
biggest way and thing that is going to effect the way this relationship is
going.
YOU
OUTSIDE NOW!... I’m done with your resistance.. I am your father.. i am the
leader of the pack and you you are not... you are last one the list.. It’s me,
Damian, Your mother, Then you all the way at the end.. This means we rule over
you.. I’m not going to take no more of you.. You will follow my rules or there
will be dire consequences.. Remember that story of Chumur gonpa.... okay...
Let’s start over.. sit.. lets meditate..
(They both sit on the ground in front of each
other cross their legs then start)
hmmmmmmm....uhmmmmmm...hmmmmmmm...uhmmmmm......you
know me and your mother love you, if not we do. The rules i made were we all
eat together pray together and sleep at the same time. I do not mean to push
it, because i know you are upset with me, but i want you guys to be raised as i
had been. Pure, i wanted you guys to be complete Ladakh born and raised children..
I wanted your brother to get married off, i wanted you to get married off...
Yes, i know you could have had a chance to but your whole perspective of Ladakh
would've changed too.. I did not want that to happen. Your my child and as my
child you were a gift to me from Leh, you are here for me to protect you until
you blossom to protect your self.. Ladakh is a dangerous place for you in my
eyes now, i do not think that it would be a safe choice to allow you to do
that... If you promise to stay safe and my pure little girl then yes you may,
but you must ask your mother, you was her gift also.. Night.
Act
II Scene II
Damian Angmo
(Damian starts off, he is kind of having a little
panic attack. His father isn’t aware of it but damian hears everything he says
to his sister. He’s terrified and believes that it couldn’t get any worse then
how its going.)
Ahh.. I don’t like this.. I don’t like this at
all… Why is daddy yelling… I don’t like when my family is so angry, anger is
scary and it makes the gods angry and upset because we are not being
positive... Daddy hasn’t been the perfect Ladakhen, he has been really
controlling over the whole family and his positivity and gracefulness had
lowered down to close to nothing.. Well damian i guess all you have is you.
Just like the loners I always hear about. Maybe if you can get the family
together one by one you could make happy with everyone.i should start easy like
Taylor, then mommy, last daddy..
(Damian breaks out into tears)
I
don’t know how i’m going to do this...
Ablae Angmo
(Change of character. Ablae has finally made up
his mind. His family would be better and cooperate together more. He calls
everyone into the prayer room)
Everyone come in here. We’ve been discussing this
for awhile and i believe well we believe, maybe we should go back to Ladakh
just for awhile. This may confuse you but the move had effected everyone. I
think maybe it would be good for our family if we had left and moved back to
Ladakh. As a whole we are separate, since i made the choice to leave Ladakh. So
now we’ll take that same path we walked to get away form the real world and
walked right back into it.
(The family stops and stares)
Yes i am serious... Yes back to our old home.
Everyone get all the stuff packed and get ready to leave..Yes Taylor Seriously
Act
III Scene I
Sunset Angmo
(The Angmo Family is moving back to Ladakh. While
on their way there, the other half had already heard the good news(due to the
interview crew and Taylor keeping in touch with them) This is Sunset.)
Oh
dear i gotta get everything clean. I can not wait until they come home. I miss
them dearly. When they come here i’m going to tell them everything that has
been going on from the point they left till they got here.
Yes.. of course i’m getting their home ready for
them to come on back home.. Its pretty bad, its been inhabited for a while....
Well it seems like some of the animals have gotten into here too..it is... Not
real bad but bad enough.. get the kids we may need extra hands..
(The other side of the family take exactly 3 days
to clean the whole home, and get the Angmo family ready for take off with a
full fill of food and clean water
to drink. On the way home the Angmo family is full of smiles hugs and
happiness. Even though the family has been okay out of Ladakh they are
determined that now moving back to Ladakh will bring on a new life with a good
change. After this point it will just be kind of like a summary of what happens
in the family’s life when and after they return to Ladakh.- When the family
arrives, all the people in Ladakh come to visit them. Everyone is happy and the
family is pretty much sure that Ladakh didn’t change as much. No one in the
community tells them about the water problem, they just think the water trucks
are because they found more pure water, which they can drink from. After a few
months, the family has gotten well acquainted.)
Act III Scene II
Damian
Angmo
(It’s around sunrise Damians’ a little late from
waking up, he washes his face with some water then heads to get something to
eat. After eating Damian goes straight outside with all of his friends.)
Mom, im leaving now. I know sunsets and im
late.....I’ll be on time this time... pprroommissee..
(5 minutes later)
Hey you guys.. Where are we off to today... oh
that’s cool, cause I haven’t been there since when I was younger
(A few minutes after walking. All the kids around
him had these water drinking canisters, Damian always figured it was just
because it was a new trend or something. Where they were playing was the same
place Damian and his sister use to go as a child. )
Lets
play tag..
(A few hours pass)
Thirtsyyy
(Damian goes to the stream which he drunk out of as a child.)
(takes a sip.)
ahhhh water,
(takes another and starts to feel ill)
I
need more water I think I'm still thirsty.
(takes another sip)
(Moans)
Maybe I'm hung
(Throws up)
I think I want to go home now
(Him and his friends exit stage, for him to come
in through a door)
Mommy I don’t feel so
(Throws up again)
Act II Scene I
Francis Angmo
When we first arrived here I thought everything
was going to be just fine. Then this happens. Maybe Ablae was right after all.
Maybe my family should’ve just stayed where we had stayed for these past
months. When push comes to shove family comes first. But when shove came in
front of push my little Damian could’ve had a better future then what’s
happening to him now. I wish I could just go back in time and find out just
what happen between the time I let him go out with his friends and now. I just
feel so careless and stupid for letting my child go out there alone with just
his friends. I feel as if I should’ve sent Taylor to go look after her younger
brother maybe just maybe I should’ve thought twice about my choices. Its just
all my fault he’s lie this now.. Just my fault
(After two weeks he gets worse and worse. His
family takes him to the place of prayer, which they all pray for his health.
The next day Damian had died.. ):
The family is really sad and regrets coming back to Ladakh. The whole
story behind this is Westernization may be good for you but Ladakh is surviving
off of everything that you leave them with, and their living with exactly what
you leave them with your trash and pollution. Westernization is ruining places
like this so that people can have what they have, which they aren’t they’re
changing what they had. Stop Westernization and save children like Damian. )
I have been thinking a lot lately about graduating. For some reason, I have been coming across many photos of SLA's first graduation and it is making me so excited and nervous at the same time! I keep wondering what it's going to feel like standing at TFI with parents clapping and gazing upon us in joy. I wonder how many of us are going to cry, and whether any of us will keep in touch long after high school has ended. After four years, we have all changed so much in our own, unique ways. Each and everyone of us have grown up and discovered ourselves. Whether we dealt with a terrible break-up or failed a few classes, we have determined our strengths and weaknesses through experience. And I think that's what high school is all about.
A part of me is scared to start a new chapter of my life. It feels like this graduation, which is happening in a little over two months, marks the defining line between childhood and adulthood. And I'm not so sure if I am ready for it. But I guess I kind of have to be, right?
Act 1 Scene 1 I opened my eyes and rolled over to the side of the bed and made a disgusted face, the apartment was dirty, my hands felt clammy, my hair was sticking to the sweat on my face, just another normal day. I hate my job, well I guess it’s not really my job considering I get nothing out of it. One night I was with this guy, he didn’t want sex or he didn’t try and get me high or anything, he just wanted someone to talk too. He told me I was beautiful and to be honest he was beautiful himself he said that I could be a model or something, I wish that was true. Anyway back to last night, the apartment I woke up in was disgusting I felt so dirty, well in this job it’s normal too feel gross, dirt was sticking to the sweat on my body all I wanted was a cool shower, I walked over to the bathroom and it was just shit I can’t even explain I’m almost positive if I took a shower I would come out dirtier. I walked out, back to the bedroom, there was a big man in the bed he was also sweating he looked greasy I wanted too throw up, he wasn’t like the beautiful boy I talked to the other night. This man kind of reminded me of my father, poor and dirty, I missed him though. I used to live in Mexico with my parents and 6 well maybe 7 sisters for some reason I can’t remember the exact age. (Starts to tear up) Everyday I try to forget what happened too me, the day I was taken out my home and dragged into a dirty smelly white van, they calmly told us not to scream, this one girl with black hair and brown oval eyes started to scream and that’s when it happened a big man, I couldn’t tell if he was dark skinned or just dirty, well he smacked her she had a red hand print across her face and she shut up. They told us we were going across the border to America. I know it wasn’t something to be excited over but I had never been to America before and maybe it would be fun, I had no idea what I was in for. I tried to sleep in the car but I couldn’t get comfortable, I mean could you get comfortable in a tightly packed van with 5 other girls. Days went by we were given the occasional bottle of water no food no nothing. “Salga de la furgoneta”. I still remember Spanish, they have us use it sometimes for certain customers. “Usted está en Nueva York”. They ushered us out the big van and into a house that looked abandoned, that’s when I met him. Edgar, he was scary and big he explained why we were here. “You’re in a business now” he voice was angry, none of us were getting any sympathy. He looked at me he noticed me, he came over and touched my face than slipped his fingers through my hair, (rubs her hair gently) “you’re going to earn me anything I need.” he whispered that in my ear, I cringed every time I think about that whisper. He explained what we’d be doing, selling our bodies, in return for drugs, money and anything that would benefit him, if he owed someone a debt they’d get our bodies, every girl in that room was drained of emotion, they couldn’t even bring themselves to cry, I remember that day like it was yesterday, it feels like just yesterday I was 16 well it’s been 2 years I’m 18 and stuck in the same position. I think I have it easiest of all the girls. Edgar thinks I’m the prettiest, so he only uses me for his most important clients, sometimes he has me work when another girl gets sick like when I was in that cruddy apartment, I think they get jealous of me sometimes, I mean if I were in their situation I’d be jealous of me too. Some of the girls have serious problems, I’m not sure why I don’t have problems I mean I do but not like them, its kind of like they turned what’s happening to us into some sick game, they fuck around with these guys minds pretend like they’re in love I mean these guys are already sickos for participating in illegal sex trafficking but still. I guess I like to be alone in the house I only go out when I’m working. Jackie is my only friend in the house, and I wouldn’t even call her a friend she’s the only girl that doesn’t shoot me dirty looks kind of like this (She grimaces) We have no beds in the house just wooden cots and a blanket, there’s no heating for the winter and no air for the summer, we have one bathroom and the windows are covered by bars, Edgar doesn’t live with us, two big Mexican men guard us and make sure we don’t try to runaway or bring unwanted attention towards the house. I wish this could be over, I wish I could change who I was, I wish I could go back to Mexico, be with my family but I cant this is the life I’m stuck with, maybe not forever but defiantly for now.
Act 2 Scene 2 Woman, to me they are the most important creatures on earth, without them I’d be no one, I wouldn’t be where I am today, I am a millionaire, all thanks to woman. My father was in the same business as I am. Some say its wrong and on the news they criticize it but what they don’t understand is that I am helping these girls, these girls are beautiful but they have nothing , what would they do if they stayed in Mexico join a drug ring, sell their bodies there, grow corn? Who knows, but what I know is that they are in America, and everything here is better. I’m showing these girls how to be women, their bodies are my property. There is one girl though, she’s the best, I have white office men after her, I have to make sure she doesn’t complain or cry, I can tell she over thinks things too much, the girls aren’t allowed to write or draw well basically they cant do anything, but her I know she writes but I tell the guards not to say anything, I can’t let my feelings get in the way of business the other girls are starting to notice how I treat her differently, they give her mean looks and brush her off. But back to what I was saying, what I do used to make me feel bad stealing girls from their homes, raping them of their pride but it’s my job and I am good at what I do. After a few years the girls learn to accept that this is what their life is
Act 3 scene 3 Chloe is so beautiful we call ourselves CJ for Chloe and Jackie. We’re best friends, all the girls hate her, I really can’t see why, shes the only one in the house with manners and, she’s just so beautiful, she doesn’t deserve this life, I mean none of us do, but her she could be a model an actress, I treat her well because I know shes going to be something, I just know it everything will work for her, i promise
Act 4 Scene 4 That bitch, she gets all the attention, considering I’m stuck here pulled away from my life my family my friends I deserve to get treated the same way as Chloe, My names Rosie, that’s prettier and more exciting then Chloe. I hate America I can’t be here, no man back home would pay to do whatever he wants to me, no one would ever do that. Chloe, she falls asleep before the rest of us, I stare at her, she isn’t that pretty, she’s nothing. A couple of us spit on her at night once this girl Margarita whose younger and has more of a wild twist to her, suggested that we cut her hair off, man I wish we did. Edgar treats her like she’s royalty SHE’S NOT (Shout this, breaks down in tears) huh ( Looks to side) , shit here I come (Walks off stage)
Act 5 scene 5 I wonder how my younger sister is doing, she’s probably all grown up now, I’m sure she’s beautiful as well, god forbid anyone like Edgar or worse gets to her like they got to me, she doesn’t deserve that. I probably won’t ever see her again (Slightly sniffles) but the memory of her my mother my father and my brothers will always be close. Unlike the rest of the girls, I enjoy America, it’s not like I really get to go out, but when I do I see bright lights the happier people like that beautiful boy I saw, i’d never forget him. When I’m back with the girls in the house I get upset again, they hate me, secretly they all hate each other. I can’t do this anymore I know stuff like this happens all over the world but it never crossed my mind that it would happen to me
Act 6 scene 6 Sex trafficking is something my team and I have being trying to stop since god knows when. It’s hard, we can only arrest them if they’re caught in the act. I know it’s going on all around New York, I don’t have some incrediable 6th sense that tells me if a girl walking down the street is selling herself, I’m just a new york street cop. They’re usually the foreign girls, the ones that look lost and sad, they look around them cautiously eye down rich men skip glances over poor ones. That’s how it works. Most of them look sickly thin, they look drugged up, if we see a girl like that usually we get our undercovers to go in and try to talk to them, get them to offer sex and we make the arrest. If it were up to me I wouldn’t arrest these girls, it’s not their choice, they didn’t choose this life (Shakes head)
Act 7 scene 7 They say that beauty fades but love will remain, how do you get love when you’re fat, slimy and girls only look at you to laugh, that’s right you don’t. I know what i’m doing is wrong and yes I could get arressted but these girls don’t know what they’re doing they make me feel special loved. One girl was absolutly beautiful. I couldn’t bring her home, with my kids. Honestly I couldn’t bring her anywhere, how embaressing would it be if I got aressted, telling my wife, my kids having to explain it to the men at work, nope nope never that. so I brought her to some shitty apartment that a guy at the fish packaging market lives it smelled and she looked disgusted but she did her job and let me tell you she did it well.
I was freaking out this morning. I couldn't find my phone. I was running all over the house like a headless chicken looking for it. I traced all my steps and looked at all the places where I was last night at my house. I searched under the couch, in the living room, in my bed, all over my desk; which is piled with junk, in the kitchen, in my backpack, and in my suitcase. I just simply couldn't find it. I wanted to call it, but nobody else was home and I don't have a home phone. I was pacing back and forth thinking of how dumb I was. This always happens to me. I was really frustrated with myself and started looking furiously for my phone. It wasn't even a good search I was just hopelessly trying to find it. I was looking in places where I knew my phone wouldn't be. This is my angry search. I look in all these pointless places, throw papers and other shit around, curse to myself, and never find my phone. It's a huge waste of time and not efficient in any way, shape, or form. After about 45 minutes I went to my bed to just lay down and relax. I went to get under my covers and in the process disturbed my cat who hissed and ran away. I discovered that the entire time she was laying on my phone. I was so glad I found it and am in a much better mood now.
My story is really coming along. I am getting close to the end of the story but I know I have to at least add another video blog and some more music. I enjoy making this because I have the ability to be another person without the true judgment of others. I hope everyone like my blog and really enjoys reading it.
I have always been the person who woke up before or as the sun came up. I dont know why, but I'm the kind of person who doesn't want to miss a lick of day. The only problem with my early bird situation, its not very often that I'm able to hang at sleep overs. I usually the first one sleep and I'm always getting pranked. When this happens, I always remember how I'll never miss a sunrise.
In quarter 3 I had many difficulties. I had already made up my mind that I couldn't draw and everything I did would come out horrible. My full body drawing was misplaced and That was my biggest accomplishment. I think the things I learned most this quarter was how to do shading and shadowing to make the most accurate drawing. Trying to portray realism was difficult because while drawing a persons already has a sense and idea of how they think that figure and or object looks like. I kept a repetitive saying in my head that Ms.Hull said to us she said" draw what you see not what you think is there." That is the only thing that kept me going in this project. My self portrait had to be the task that I used that saying the most. I kept saying I'm pretty sure that is what I look like, but turned out the final product looked nothing like me. I then started over and drew exactly what I seen, the project came out just the way I wanted it to, just like me. This quarter has been a challenge but I learned a lot from it that is the most beneficial.
Self Portrait Second edition My still life Photo
The very first realistic drawing of our hands.
This is the first try to my self portrait.
This is the large version on my bottle. This is the smaller version of a different bottle.
We made a quick run to Cvs tonight, i'm in a strange and hyper place that may or may not be medicine or lack there of related. annnnyway I ended up sprinting past patricia at break neck speeds (did i say that right?) and she caught up with me later.
My work represents me and how I try. As I know I might not be the best artis but I try my best and what separates me from a lot of people is that knowing that i am not good I still try. This that you see is what I was able to produce
Photo on 2011-04-06 at 18.36 #2
Photo on 2011-02-16 at 11.02
Photo on 2011-04-06 at 18.37
Drawing of my ode
The first photo below was photoshopped to show that no one flower shines brighter than the other.
The second photo was taken to show that even though the world is starting to loose a lot of trees there are still some that are here.
The last photo shows different warm colors over a garden to represent spring
You ever had a crush and loved them ever since the day you met them. that's how i feel. but i won't act upon it and when the opportunity passes me i'll kick myself in the chest and regret it later.
The time of January 4th, 1993 several events had occurred. Time Magazine man of the year was Bill Clinton while dark Matter was announced by STSCI. Australian politician & South African coach died all these events happened on the day I graced the world.
SO! Im way to excited for school to start up. I am officially very proud to say that I am a Benett Bell. Today my mother and I went to the Human Trafficking Conference that my future major was hosting. I was so happy that I was able to meet most of my teachers and the directors of my major. Tomorrow, I go in for my belle begining program and im little nervous about that. Oh! I always found out that because my GPA is above a 3.3 I am allowed to stay in the honors dorm as a incomming freshwoman :D
So far, I started my tumblr for my character. I decided to make a tumblr instead of a twitter because a twitter just seemed to... immediate. It's harder than I thought it would be to make a social networking page for a 6 year old. Everyone says its normal, but maybe I'm overthinking it. To me, it's ridiculous. My mind is too technical I figure. anyway, the only thing about starting a tumblr is that my mind takes perfection seriously within the customization of the page, instead of the blogs or posts or whatever. So now, I must focus on the actual story that I'm trying to tell.
The other day my mom and I ate a diner. I saw that they had a coloring kids menu. I know I'm officially an adult now, but I love coloring. I immediatley asked the waitress if I could get a kids menu. She looked at me kind of weird and brought one over, however she forgot the crayons. I asked her "May I have some crayons please?" Then she really looked at me weird and just left to get me some crayons. My mom said she was embarassed to be with me (and I don't blame her) but I love coloring. In fact, for my birthday I got two kids coloring books with a pack of crayons. It was my best (and only present). I started to color the kids menu as my mom sat there bored. I asked if she would like to color with me, which she did. I then asked for her opinion on which color to color spongebob, since there was no yellow crayon. She looked up at me and said, "I'm not going to have a conversation with you about what color you should color Spongebob." She put her head back down and continued to color until our meal came.
I haven't posted anything the past two days because I was away and couldn't. So here is me making up those two posts I missed. Yesterday I was at a hotel walking around and I came across a bunch of dandelions. When I was younger I would try so hard to blow all the white fuzzies off the dandelion in one blow but never could. This always really upset me because all my friends and family could easily do this but I never could. I would persistently keep on trying to blow the fuzzies off, yet after a 5-8 tries I would be out of breath and would just give up. Wondering if I would still encounter this problem now I took a deep breathe in and blew. I blew all the fuzzies off the dandelion in one blow! I was so happy. I started running around plucking dandelions and blowing the fuzzies off them. I defeated my long childhood struggles and wanted to pluck every dandelion insight and blow the fuzzies off all of them. However, I eventually ran out of breath and decided I would another time.
I left the bathroom stall and waited for my friend, Heather, to come out. I stood in front of the mirror like any teenage girl, messing with my hair and lip gloss. After 5 minutes, I realized she wasn't in a stall, so I walked outside to look for her. I soon realized that she wasn't in the amusement park at all! In fact, none of the group was. I quickly called Vernon to find out what had happened. After missing my call, he called me back.
"Uh, who's this? "Vernon, it's Taylor." "Taylor who? Oh right. Why are you calling me from-" I heard a muffled sound as he turned around in the car to look for me. "Oh." "OOHHH!"
They were pulling out of the parking lot, never noticing that I wasn't there. I was almost left in an amusement park and that's how it happened.
