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“Who am I ?”, a question that disappoints many when asked. How do you explain every level of your inner self? The reflection as a  man, woman, husband, wife, provider, daughter, or son isn’t easy when you’re on the outside looking into yourself... I don’t think I did to well on the whole reflecting part of all of this, I know who I am on the outside, finding what’s within is hard. To find things you’ve forced yourself to forget, the deepest thing of your personality, and your past. Many things could be put into the “ I force myself to forget drawer,” of my brain.  The question “Who Am I?” comes up a lot in life, I’m am not happy with my answer to this question, maybe I’m more upset with the fact that the deepest parts of me are so far away that when I try to reach for them I drown in a sea of “ Who Am I”.

My Me Magazine  represents slightly who I am on the inside but it mainly represented who I am on the outside. Maybe, I’m too young to know who am I on the inside, it took me years to understand who I am/ who I was  going to be on the outside. It will take a while for me to fully understand who I am on the inside, and if I am fully happy with who I am. My Me Magazine spoke of the history of the people before me. The future of the people ahead of me. They all know who they are, and one day I’ll understand.

I kept my slide as simple and readable as possible, it allows people to be able to read it quickly and understand what I meant. I tried to make it as visible as possible with out many words so the reader or the students and teacher watching me explain what I saying don't have to stare at my slide trying to read all the words, while tuning me out as I speak and explain each word. My slide had one point, and it was me trying to figure out who I am. I tried to keep with the rule of the thirds which I found more difficult than not. People work a long time on designing billboards and ads on companies and products, it's a difficult job.

Everyday I go hunt for some frogs near the river I get about 3 frogs a day then all a sudden the frogs stopped coming I got nothing this month. i've been eating nothing but small insects but those tiny bugs do not make my hunger go away. I need to find frogs or eles i will starve to death. huh I sense something unusual. what is this a human wearing leaves and branches who has all these frogs!? I’m going fallow him out. As I sliver though the forest chase the human I see less and less of my and more of habitat and hear noses I never heard before I'm so scared. is this more humans and there knocking down the trees and digging into my home with these yellow thing I must confront them but there's too many and i'm unfamiliar with this place. I can't do anything can I- hay!!! I what is this rope around my head it no no the human again!!!.

(Sitting in classroom with friends, where they’re planning the Senior Prank for their school.) If none of you have any ideas for some pranks, I got some we could use.  We could have hundreds and hundreds of bouncy balls, stuffed in a room.. or a locker! In a locker, even better! When they open the locker, these bouncy balls burst out of the locker, bouncing all over the room and hitting everyone, all congested into this tiny hallway in the building!

Or we could release.. a cow? no, a pig. Two - no three - no two. Paint two and three onto those pigs, they’ll be looking for the first forever! Or just leave a box in the middle of each hallway labeled… “Senior Prank”, nothing in the box. Except one - no, nevermind. Ooh! we could hide that fruit… what’s it called.. Durian? Yeah, durian. We could get a couple of those and hide ‘em in easy-access places throughout the whole school, it’ll be awesome. Those ideas any good? . We could replace the bouncy balls with balloons, may be easier to clean but cheaper to do.

(PAUSE)

(He starts to think in his head) Although the durian is a little too harsh… the smell will stick for the next week, and we still go to school here..The bouncy balls will be expensive… like 300 dollars for 5000 bouncy balls…Oh I got a good one.. We could find a door in the building, with only one entrance. Remove the door, add drywall, paint over it. Place plant in front of it. People completely forget about the room. Nah, too much money and work.

(Starts to get louder and more hyper than before, slowly.)

(Continues to think in his head) No I’m not bitching’ out, just sayin they all cost money and the way my money set up.. and I don’t feel like getting’ in trouble.. we’re graduating in a few days after all.  Don’t want to upset the principal so bad that we don’t get to graduate. I don’t want to sit here and just plan on getting’ expelled is all. If I don’t feel like doing this, why am I being forced to? ‘Cause of you mates. You mates gettin’ me in trouble day after day, alcohol and drugs and all of that. Barely passing the grade because of all the shit you guys makin me do. Peer pressure has gotten to me because of you mates. Grades ‘re low, and almost dropped out ‘Because of you guys. I’m tired of it… so glad I’m graduating finally and get away from you fools.

(PAUSE)

I can’t believe it, I’m so confused.  I just met a scout from the Pittsburgh Pirates, right after the playoff game. He told me that they have been scouting me for years now and I didn’t even know!  He told me they want me come down and play for one of their Minor League teams.

Before that day, I have been planning on going to a well known college, Notre Dame.  I talked to their coach and he said he feels like I would be a perfect fit for that team and I’m exactly what he has been looking for.  I don’t mean to brag but, an outfielder who can play all infield position and hit.  Who wouldn’t want me to play for them, and I was looking forward to going to college. I love the campus and ever since I visited, it has just had a grip on me.  And most importantly a college education is important isn’t it?  I know my mom wants me to get my education.  All she has been talking about me going to college and how proud of me she is.  I would feel bad if I let her down by not going to college like I said I would.  But when she hears about the opportunity I have, won’t she still be proud and happy for me?

Going to the MLB has been my mission since I was 8 years old.  My dream has always been having my name and number on the back of a professional team’s jersey, no matter what team it is.  The thrill of just getting to play on the same field with the same people I watched on tv and looked up to will be enough for me.  If i were to make it pro, I will become an inspiration to myself.  By me playing with the superstars of the game I love, will inspire me to work hard enough to become the best player on any field that I walk on.

This is my chance!  If I go to college who knows if this chance will present itself again.  The opportunity to go to school will always be there.  But this only happens once in a lifetime.  Of course if I chose the MLB I will have to play in the Minors first.  Then, my main focus will be to prove that I am Major League material.

(Pause)

Whenever I need help I always go to my dad.  He is the one person I can always go to if I need great advice. He never makes the decision for me but he puts strong thoughts in my head so I can do it myself.  He told me to follow my heart, because either way I go, I will still be taking a big jump into a new part of my life.  He told me if I think I have what It takes to play on that level, then go play ball.  I knew exactly what he meant.  He wasn’t saying if I think I have the talent and ability to play pro baseball go do it.  He was saying if I’m strong enough mentally then go do it.  He was saying I can’t let the money, the popularity, and the women that come with a major league contract get to my head.  And I think I can do that.  NO!  I know I can do that.  I’ve worked to hard to be stopped right in my tracks.  

So I think I made my decision.  I will be taking my talents to the MLB.  Man I always wanted to say that.  But, I will not only be going for me.... I will be going for my parents.  I will be able to provide for my parents and give them back all the love that they gave me growing up and show them how much I really care and appreciate them.  That has to be the best feeling in the the world, to tell your parents they can stop working because I gotchu now.

But now here comes the moment of truth.  Telling my mom my decision.  Here I go….

Staring down into the toilet, one hand holding my hair and one in my mouth debating if I should or not thinking about yesterday and how I emotionlessly I looked through my mom as she wiping her tears saying“Why are you doing this to yourself? You need to stop doing this. You are going to get sick When you are in the bathroom, leave it unlocked. Is this  the reason you’ve been ‘throwing up’ (used air quotes) lately?I just thought you might be pregnant…how often do you?

I replied “I don't know” (pause)

“In the morning I’d brush my teeth and leave the water running. When I came home from school after my first meal of the day I warned the boys I had to use the bathroom and to not knock on the door. After dinner, before I took a shower while the water was running. When I snuck downstairs in the middle of the night I snuck downstairs and ate a snack, then visit after” (pause)

I would look in the mirror pull and tug, I never was satisfied. You name it I tried it. I worked out every single fucking day twice a day, it never worked fast enough. Oh! I was on that no junk food and only 2,000 calories, It came to a point that I’d only eat about only 800 a day.

Nothing ever worked. (pause)

I had given up, I ordered a small pizza and ate half of the  box in my room. I had regretted it as soon as I done it.

Tears running down my face I ran downstairs to the bathroom and began to brush my teeth. I had pushed too hard and went to deep and hit my uvula I ran here got on my knees and let it out. That was the first time I discovered it, next time and every day after that I’d do it on purpose, it made me feel like everything I ate just washed away and everything would go away.

Every day I had to go to school and they’d snicker and laugh and make jokes touching the fat on my arms and my stomach. I would’nt  eat lunch, because I was’nt  hungry, I didn’t have an appetite. The bathroom became my sanctuary, the things I did in here was a secret and  neither of us would tell.

I’d eat as much as I could as fast as I could then go upstairs run the water or play some music, sometimes both, get on my knees and find comfort in the porcelain throne.

After a while I stopped using the back of my toothbrush to do it, my index finger was good enough.

The Party Setup

Alex on the phone:

       Hey Guys I need some ideas on decorations and pranks for the Halloween party. What do you think?

Alex got his phone and set up multi caller for his friends Cyrus, Hunter, Xavier, Liam, and Zoey for help.

They said they will help.

Alex went to get a notepad to right down pranks they suggested.

Cyrus suggested to do the upper body carrying lower body prank.

“Sound’s like a good idea.” Alex said.

Hunter suggested the scaring in disguise prank.

Hunter thinks that’s the best prank in his opinion.

“I will keep that in mind.” Alex said.

Xavier suggested a prank that he thinks will knock them of their socks off. The prank was the Crying witch prank.

“That sounds like the best prank so far” Alex said.

Liam suggested a prank that will help Alex would be the fake spider/cockroach prank. To Liam that is the most hilarious prank in the book.

“That does sound like good prank to do” Alex said.

In Zoey’s opinion, the prank that she thinks will guarantee a scare would be the the fake gruesome injury prank or the simple pop out prank.

“It is not the most creative idea, but it can still work.” Alex said. I think we should do all of the pranks. Alex suggested. Everybody agreed. Okay then, next Halloween decorations.

Cyrus suggested the gruesome, scary, fake dead body hanging off tree because it is his favorite decoration.

“Sounds like a good idea.” Alex said.

Alrighty, alrighty you guys please settle down this staff meeting is commencing. Now, this week wasn’t the best now, the pipes did bust in the laundry room which uhh...that was pretty bad. What did ya say son? Because they’re wood? It took 5 years for the modern day pipes  to bust, we’ve had these wooden ones for almost 200 years. You need to knock some sense into that young head of yours this place is amazing. No I’m not some crazy old man! Are you guys crazy? You must be absolutely insane some of your parents and grandparents lived here. Mary, you were birthed about 100 feet away, right there in the lobby! Don’t tell me you’re really trying to knock this place down? (mumbles) Maybe we need a new manager, someone with some more appreciation for this place. No, you guys don’t appreciate it! You wanna knock it down make “bigger and better”. Ya know kids this is the bigger and better.

At one time when I was a young boy, I’ll never forget JFK visiting, he said this was the finest hotel, the only one he went to that had ice cream bar with his favorite, hot fudge. What! Whose JFK? The 35th President of the United States god dammit! His spoon and picture are hung up in the dining room. Are you dumb? You guys already got the ice cream bar replaced with a regular bar, ya messing up tradition. Mary I expected more from you, my only daughter. You know how much this place means to me.

Tearing it down means ripping apart my childhood. I was a homeless child, abandoned and hungry. Living on the streets looking for a place to live. I had no luck, all I had were bridges to jump off of or pills to take to end it all. Mr. Clermont  found me and saved my life. He let me stay at his hotel, this hotel. This place gave me a job, a place to sleep, a reason to live. You know that! This place means everything to me! (sniffles) Now I know all of you think I’m some goofy old man but I just tell jokes because Mr. Clermont loved them. He was my father figure on his deathbed I told him I would keep this place alive the way it is, the way it is supposed to be forever. There are so many memories, you can’t take those away from me, but they’re trying too.

(starts to calm down) The doctor, the doctor says something's wrong with my brain. And um, I can’t lose my memories, not today. Alzheimer's can’t get to me. I have this place. Don’t take my joy and happiness away from me, not when it’s all I got left. Yeah, this place is a little old but we have custom made chandeliers with real gems in them. Who's got that? We got that! We have three awards for longest upkeep of wood pipes! Who's got that? We got that! Our Yelp reviews are always, always amazing. Who's got that? We got that! Ain’t no denying, this place is special it’s everything. I just, I just want things to be how they were before all this new stuff and I keep on forgetting the old stuff, what matters. (walks over to sit in a chair and looks up) I’m an old man (tear rolls down his cheek) who can’t even remember that his only daughter's name isn’t even Mary, it’s M-m-m-m-mia? Mia. (puts head in hands and cries)

You know, when I was made I never thought my job was… important. I thought I wasn’t making much of a difference in the world but really I was making a huge one to my community. I mean it could have been a lot worse, I have brothers who live in the hood part of the city, and cousins who only live for a few days before they’re hit by a car, or vandalized. It’s a rough world for trash cans, in this world.  I could’ve had it a lot worse but somehow I ended up here! In the cleanest area of the city. I have one of me on every street corner and they help me out a lot. Every time someone throws something in my I feel like, I'm helping the community a little bit more…

OKAY! Before we get some more into that let’s talk about something different. Just like those people who just passed us I HATE it when people use my name as an insult. See my parents weren’t too original with my name, I am literally Trash the trash can this is my full name. So when somebody says “Oh my god you're absolute trash, or you look like trash.” it pisses me off, my name in the trash community is a strong name. Parents who have high hopes for their new trash cans produced name them trash if they KNOW they can get the job done. If I said “You’re absolute Sara today, or you look like Jessica, or even your outfit is so John” HOW WOULD YOU FEEL? I live to help keep the streets clean. My friends are the trash cans who are on different corners around me, or near me. From the day I was placed here I worked to help the community, even when I didn’t want to at first. After being here for ten years I think it’s time I got some recognition and not have my name used as an insult. I work so hard to make sure your community isn’t filled with litter. Yes litter because us trash cans don’t like to use the word trash to talk about filth. We work hard, I used to hated what I was made for but now I love it! I love it when my area of the city is nice and clean. The trash moto is “A clean life is a healthy life”. I just wish people would realize how much I care about the wellbeing of the community.  

Yo …How many times do I need to call you to get your ass down here to eat, huh? ...Noon, uhh, don’t talk back at me… I have been calling you for the past 10 minutes, I should not have to call you a trillion times for you to eat! *paused silence* What’s this *sniff sniff* Andrew are you fucking serious! I thought that you’ll be different! Oh my gosh…*pulls weed out* ...S-So this is yours! I thought it was your brother’s. What did you just say? Oh, so it was your brother’s huh? He’ll beat you the fuck up if he finds out that you took his joints! Did you forget about what he did?! He killed the love of my life, your father, because he said your brother couldn’t do drugs. Now he’s suffering in jail for the rest of his life. I won’t allow you to take that path and end up like him! ..Be Quiet!, Let me finish.

Drugs is like an addiction. Once you start, you won’t be able to stop. You do it once, then again, and forever. Andrew, be honest. When did you start? A month a-go!? *Starts sobbing

This is all my fault! If I watched you and payed close attention to you, this wouldn’t have happened. It’s all my fault. Your father and I made an agreement together that your brother could not do drugs, but he paid for it since he was home! *Pause* I should’ve been home too. Forget working, I should’ve been home to help out when you needed help the most. I wish that it was not your father and it was me home at that time.*Starts sobbing*  I-I-I just wished that this wouldn't have turn out this way!

You're all I have right now. I can’t lose you too! Look what happened when your father died, I was depressed for a month. I won’t lose you too. You're only 17! You should be hanging out with friends, going to prom and having fun making memories, but instead you’re getting  high as a kite!

Why did you start this? This “drug” business?? Was it your dad? Was it me? C’mon, say something! Talk to me! If it’s dad, then talk to him, visit his grave. He’s a really good listener. So it’s not. What? You started doing this because no one wanted to go to prom with you?!...And I thought that there was a bigger issue!... You should have told me..! I can get a hot chick to go with you, did you forget? I look like I’m only 20! Everyone knows that your dad died but NO one knows that I am your mom. I had always wanted to go to a prom and if you don’t want me to go, I can always get someone for you? Would you do the honor to go to prom with me?. Yass now you're smiling. …But you’re going to have to go to rehab first!

…Why won’t you? You think this is funny!...You got Hookah from your friends not drug? *Shock* ohh my goodness, honeyyy! I’m sorry for making assumptions! I should’ve had known better that the drug was not drug!! The smell of drugs just trigger the memories of your dad and brother which you know that I am unable to hold back. I’m really sorry for making an assumption AGAIN! I should have learned from the last time. *Takes a deep breath* But you should know this, hookah is not that bad just don’t overdo it. It can damage your health even though it seems harmless. *looks at time* Oh my, so much time had passed by! Hurry up and go downstairs to eat, it is almost your bedtime and Andrew, I am really glad that it is not drugs! *Smiles*

(Sitting at the dinner table)

Guess what happen to me the today? No, I did not get a girlfriend dad, but I’m one step away from getting one. Mary Beth waved at me today. What do you mean that doesn’t mean anything? Mary Beth is the hottest girl in school and she acknowledge my existence and waving obviously means that she likes me. Oh, so waving doesn’t mean she likes me in that way, she just probably likes me as a friend. Okay, I guess that I might have misread the situation. Talking about meeting people, I was wondering how you and mom met.  

No mom did not put me up to this. I just thought that if you remember the good times you and Mom had that you guys will stop fighting. Yes, I know that you guys fight. You do not do a great job at hiding it. Every night I hear you guys fighting and I stay up frightened, thinking that you guys are going to get divorced, but I know that is just a crazy thought. (PAUSE) Right. Wait, no…. don’t tell me. You guys are planning to get a divorce. When were you guys planning to tell me? When the time was right, so you were going to take me to the movies or an amusement park or something dumb like that and tell me then. You should have been honest with me from the beginning.

You don’t love her! But she is my Mom, you know the person you have been married to, for the past 20 years. I heard that marriages goes through rough patches. Maybe this is just your marriage’s  rough patch and eventually you will rekindle your love. So you’re not going to even try? Those 20 years of watching me grow up. Watching our family form is just nothing to you? Do not let this marriage fail, I will not let this marriage fail. If you’re not going to do it for her, then do it for me. You’re only son, the person you changed their diapers, the person who you taught how to catch a ball, the person who you bought them their first car.

Mom’s asking for the one asking for the divorce? Why is she the one asking for the divorce? You cheated on Mom! How could you do that to her? You have a single handedly teared a who family apart just for a piece of side action. I looked up to you Dad, I thought you were the best person in the world, not capable of hurting no one. I was obviously wrong about you. You are now nothing to me, except for the peice of shit who left my mom for a whore. NO, I will continuing using this tone with you and you’re going to listen.

(What the actor sees: The Dad begins walking to the door)

Now you’re leaving because you are not man enough to face your problems. If you walk out that door, Dad you will lose me forever. *Door Slams* He actually left, what does this mean for my family? I didn’t mean some of things I said, I was just angry at him. He left us though, he had the nerve to leave us. There’s is no going back now I guess. I lost my Dad, the person who is suppose to be there for me. I should not have push it so far.(Curtain Drops and Lights turn off)

IT’S SHE, NOT HE! I don’t know why you keep referring to me as a girl. Just because I still have boobs doesn’t mean that I am a female. I was born in the wrong body, and you know that. Even though we came out of same womb, and we look exactly alike, doesn’t mean that we have to be the same gender. It would be wrong if I called you a boy right? Especially when I know damn well that you have a vagina and giant breast like me.  If I can’t afford the surgery of getting mine removed, and you know that! If I could get my boobs removed, then I would. Mom doesn’t support that idea, and I couldn’t persuade her even if I tried. I am even saving up every last dime to remove them.

Why are you staring at me like that? Is it , because you want me to be your twin “sister” ? You’ are not okay with the idea of having a twin “brother”? This is who I really am. I’m sorry if this disappoints you in anyway. You need to come to realization that once we come out the womb, we chose who we want to be in our lives, and not always what our genes makes us.You’re my sister, and you should be in support of any decision I make. You’re supposed to have my back, and not be on mom’s side. I am not comfortable with who I am, and this is who I am deciding to be.

Maybe our genes get mixed up, and we both came out as girls. Maybe mom was sick or had something going on when she got pregnant, that could change me being a girl. I was supposed to be born with a penis, and grow up to have a mustache. You were born the way you are, and I don’t judge you at all.

I think I will even change my name while I am at. I’ll change it to Jason, Alex, or evan Marcus. I’m just tired of you seeing me with the eyes we share in common as a “she.” How many times do I have to tell you?! I am a he!!! I don’t identify as a boy. I am finally comfortable with who I am. I am finally comfortable with going out public, and being who I was meant to be. A boy.

Soy Will Ferrell

siempre, soy

cómico y famoso,

cuando tengo tiempo libre, me encanta pasar tiempo con amigos

ver la tele y cocinar,

No soy ni delgado

ni deportista

Yo soy…

YO!

Soy

Valiete y liel,

Bijo, delgado y timibo

Soy todos los días confundido más de futuro.

Soy poderoso en todos los días más de gente

Soy perezoso y trabajadoro y serio

Odio escribir y descansar

me gusta correr

She’s still asleep. Does she know she has school today? She must be staying home again. Ugh, I need to be washed. I don’t think she’s noticed. Can someone crack a window? It’s so stuffy in here, how is she even wrapped in her blankets like that? Oh, she’s waking up. She’s checking the time… but she’s not freaking out. She’s definitely staying home from school, then. And… she’s going back to sleep. Nice. It’s almost eight in the morning. When did she get like this? I remember years ago, when we first met, she was so full of energy. She would always wake up before her alarm and was ready to start her day. Now she just… lays here. Am I the only one who notices? I must be the only one. I’m worried.

It’s almost noon. She’s been awake for the last three hours, but she hasn’t gotten out of bed. She’s just been on her phone. Isn’t she hungry? She hasn’t even eaten since seven o’clock last night… Isn’t she hungry? She has to be. Maybe she numbed it out. Can someone please crack a window? I can’t believe no one’s checked on her yet. I know they’re awake, I can hear them. I wouldn’t be surprised if they left her alone, even when she’s like this. It’s not like they notice, anyway. She’s practically cocooned in these blankets, unmoving, and no one even thought to peek their head in.

It’s cloudy today. There’s no way she’s doing anything productive today. I guess I better get comfortable.

I wish I could help her. I wish I could talk to her. I wish she knew she had someone who understands. I mean, I’m the one who’s always with her when she’s like this. Countless nights she’s spent here wondering if it’s worth it. I wish I could tell her it’s ok to just lay here sometimes. I wish I could tell her that none of it’s her fault. I never worry too much, though. I know at some point she’ll get back up again and make an effort - she always does. I admire that about her. In fact, sometimes I’m relieved when she takes a break. I can see the emotional toll everything takes on her.

I wish I could talk to her, but I can’t. I’m just a bed.

Mi Nombre es Kristian

A Veces, Soy

Deportista y alto

De Vez en Cuando, me encanta jugar video juegos, ir al cine y hablar por telefono.

No soy ni bajo

Ni baliar.

Yo Soy…

YO!

(Introduction) She is about to come over after she is done with whatever she has to do. I’m about to get some action when she comes over.

(on the phone with Chris)

Him: I just met her yesterday, on my way to class.

Him: She’s super fine bro, she got a real nice body.

Him: Her butt is super big.

Him: Nawl I don’t want to date her, that’s not me you know that.

Him: Because I’m just trying hit, yameen.

Him: Well, I mean I can’t help it, girls just like me like that.

Him: whatchu mean what about kayla?

Him: I don’t talk to that girl anymore, she’s to attached.

Him; Nawl, I don’t care if you talk to her. (giggles)

Him: Wait, hold on she callin now.

(Pause…)

(On the phone with Mariah)

Him: Wassup Mariah?

Him: Yeah you can still come over.

Him: Nawl my parents aren’t home.

Him: Whatchu mean, what are we going to do?

Him: What yo, we are not going to “Netflix and Chill.”

Him: Because that boring, I’m tryna do something that fun.

Him: Wait hold on, Chris is on the other line.

(pause…)

(switches the line back over to Chris)

Him: Yo

Him: Now why would you call me by my first name, you know I don’t like being called Trey.

Him: You know why I don’t like being called that, and she was talking about some “Netflix and chill”.

Him: I know she thought that I wanted to watch Netflix with her, that’s only me and my lil sis.

Him: Wait hold on bro, I think she hung up.

( Pauses...)

(Back on the phone with Mariah)

Him: So are you coming over or what?

Him: But why do we have to watch Netflix, I don’t like Netflix.

Him: Listen girl, just make sure you wearing something nice.

Him: So what you're saying is that you’ll wear something nice, if we watch Netflix?

Him: Fine we can watch Netflix, and you’ll find out the rest when you get over here.

Him: Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, just hurry up and get over here.

(Phone calls ends with Mariah, switches back over to Chris.)

Him; Yo Chris I gotta go.

Him: Because she on her way over and I gotta make my room look presentable. ( Starting fixing his bed)

Him: Because I don’t want her coming over to a dirty room, and she start thinking that I have bed bugs or something.

Him: A lot of girls do think that, member what happened to Keem?

Him: I know but he was always a dirty Young bull, so… But Yo ima call you later so I can get ready and make sure nobody is coming in the house until later on.

Him: I’m hanging up you. Your talking a little too much right now.

Him: Ima call you when she leaves OK, just stay up and close to the phone.

( The phone hangs up and then it rings again.)

Conclusions : Ugh, why is he calling back? I’m not answering I have important things to do before Mariah comes over.

*Singing and dancing* Social Justice 1.2.3. Woo woo!  I wanna be PC. Woo woo!  It’s just the way to be, for me and you. Woo woo!  Awe girl, I love this shooow. It’s the best thing in the frickin world yo. *Whispers* It’s even better than kittens. *Raises right hand* All the truth, nothing but the truth, so help me god it really is. Child, this show is like the internet times 10 plus 11. Watch it! It’s not just awesome, it’s amazingly awesome! This show ain’t got no picks forreal. You really need to watch it. They basically don’t give a fuck. They’ll say and do whatever they want. No lie. The creators got bigger balls than Rick Ross. They’ll come at you no matter what. Yes gurl, they be right at ya situation forreal. The other day they was making fun of Caitlyn Jenner. *Wildly laughing* Exactly, the woman hasn’t even been a woman for a year yet and they already at her neck. But forreal though you got to watch it.

Ha. Stop, you really tried it. It is way, way, waaayyy better than Family Guy. Nothing can compare to this show. It comes on all the time and you barely see reruns.  Every episode is different.*Pause* What you mean how? Because they are different. A baby and a dog don’t go on an adventure every episode. I’m not tryna throw shots though.  I really think you should watch it Terry. *Pause* Because you are my best friend and this show can benefit you. It can benefit all of us! *Begging* This show has been on 18 years and it deserves the attention Terry.

Are you going to watch it? Come on, it’s basically about a group of third graders... I don’t care how old you are. People older than us watch this show. No, a sixteen year old watching a bunch of third graders isn’t weird at all. Shh, just listen dammit. It’s funny because one of them always die. Naw, it’s the same boul. He die like almost every episode and then comes back to life and his friends never remembers it. They was like fuck YOLO, “our characters live a lot”. But wait, shut up I wasn’t done, I gotta tell you more. So there are 4 main characters and one of them hella funny forreal. He disrespectful on a whole new level yo. He be bullying everybody, especially Jews. It’s funny and wrong at the same time. He’s always messing with the other main character who is Jewish. But I don’t feel like explaining it anymore. Can you just watch the show please? Please? I always do things for you Terry. *Pause* Really? Okay, okay, don’t hang up yet. It’s called South Park and it comes on *hangs up* Comedy Central… *rolls eyes* She’s so damn rude.

(Looks up and hollers at his wife)

Hey Hon, can you come downstairs for a minute?

I have great news to tell you!

I also have some pizza and wings here!

I know, we ate an hour ago but, I’m hungry so come down and eat with me!

I have to tell you something!

(Heads to the living room and sits on the couch)

Before I tell you, let me go to the bathroom first.

Don’t worry, I’ll be quick.

(Looks back at his wife, irritated) I said I’ll be quick Susan!

(Back on the couch)

So, If you’ve noticed these past few months I’ve been going out with the boys, right?

You know, Victor, Manny, Ben, and Jerry.

Don’t you remember? Ben and Jerry are my dudes with the big ice cream company.

You know! We’ve had their ice cream before. We thought it was pretty damn good!

Uhmm, I forgot what the company’s called but I know that it’s an ice cream company.

(Pauses)

Yeah, yeah! I told you, you would remember mhm, it’s the one with the weird and long ice cream names.

Anyways, I told my boys that I lost my job a week ago and Ben and Jerry offered that I could work at their company.

So, these past few weeks I’ve been going to their factory at South street trying all of the different flavors of their ice cream to help my palate familiarize all the ice cream flavors before I start working.

(Pauses)

Hmm...

...But for some reason, I always get a blurry vision and I’m desperate for food at the end of the day after the tasting!

(Pauses and his brows moves down as it comes together)

I have to be careful with what?

Oh, that’s a different story.

I know that  mom has diabetes but that doesn’t mean I’m getting it too!

Well, I could if I keep doing this for years and years but I’ve been only doing this for a few months.

Susan! Are you even listening? (Eyes widening)

(Pauses)

(His brows furrowed) There’s nothing to worry about, honey.

It’s not a big deal...

(Stands up)

Hold on a sec, gotta go to the bathroom!

(Sits back down)

Okay, back to what I was saying.

What was I saying again?

Ohhhh, (laughs) right!

No, I am feeling just fine honey!

Like I said, it’s normal!

My vision always gets blurry but if I relax for a bit, it’s all good!

(Slams his left hand on the couch) No, you don’t have to worry about this...

Okay, again, back to what I was saying!

Their ice cream is great and they still create those cheesy and weird names for their ice cream.

(Giggles) They even made fun of me for peeing every minute and joked that they will name their new ice cream flavor the (Does the finger quote gesture) “Mr. Pee-body,” dedicated to me!

(Laughs and right palm facing up just below his chest)

Well, at first, I was irritated by them making jokes about me but, I ended up laughing with them!

(Laughs) Oh god, it was a fun day!

(Stands up) I’m sorry hon, I gotta pee again!

Be right back!

(Comes back to the couch)

(He raises a brow) Wait wait wait, did you just call the doctor?

For why?

Oh my god, Susan!

It’s not that serious, okay?!

What do you mean, “you already set an appointment for tomorrow”?

Now you’re making me feel like a child who is afraid to see the doctor.

(Head down, looks to the right, and exhales) Fine, we’ll see what happens.

(At the doctor’s clinic)

Hi, how are you Doctor Porter?

I am Mike Breyers and this is my wife Susan Breyers.

(Short smile)

It’s nice meeting you too.

So, I am here today to… uhmm know if I have a uhmm oh yeah, I just have some concerns about how my body has been responding to certain things lately.

So, I’ve been working at an ice cream company as the ice cream taste tester and yes, I do consume a not so little amount of ice cream everyday. But, afterwards I tend to have a blurry vision and I am always hungry…

It’s nothing serious but it’ s weird.

(Lips pursed together and eyes widening)

Are you serious, Susan?

Okay, so just like what my wife said, I also get irritated a lot and (laughs) I visit the bathroom frequently.

(Sarcastic tone) Wow, thanks for noticing Hon.

Yes Doctor, I’ve been getting a blurry vision, I do pee a lot, I am always starving…

Yeah, I get irritated.

(Pauses)

What about them?

I’ve noticed that my body is acting weirdly, Doctor Porter.

I don’t think I’m allergic to ice cream...

I’m not feeling anything severe, but…

My wife’s right, I’ve been acting differently and so does my body.

Oh, so you think ice cream has a huge impact on my body?

(Forehead creased) I have most of the symptoms for what, Doctor Porter?

(Jaw drops) For diabetes?

But, that doesn’t mean I have it!

Well, my mom has diabetes...

She has a type 2 diabetes.

(Exhales deeply) I really have diabetes, Doctor Porter?

(Murmurs) I guess I have to tell Ben and Jerry about this that I could no longer work for their company.

Yes, I work at my friend’s ice cream company.

(Eyes widens) Oh, how do you know Ben and Jerry?

Ahhh, right.

Ben and Jerry’s Ice cream.

(Smiles)

Hon, it’s called Ben and Jerry’s ice cream.

Ben and Jerry’s ice cream gave me diabetes!

Matthew Lor (Brother)     

     Tengo lindo y moreno.

Soy alto y me gustA salir con mi novia.

   Soy de fiLadelfia pero vivo en upper darby.

 Odio mi hErmana.

   Me fasciNa break dance.

    y no poder canTar.

          Soy asiaticO.

         Tengo dieciSe anos.