Behind the melody, lives a message. In between the lyrics, lies a story.

Another Brick in the Wall, Pt. 2 - Pink Floyd

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HrxX9TBj2zY

The Handmaids are just normal women, or at least they were. When a handmaid is being “trained” they find themselves at the Red Center. There, they are taught the ways in which they are supposed to think, the ways they are supposed to see each other, themselves, and the things they have experienced. The control that is imposed upon them brought me to the song Another Brick in the Wall, Pt 2 by Pink Floyd. The lyrics in this song vividly reminded me of a specific scene that takes us back to the Red Center in the early days of Offred’s story. The specific lyrics that relate to this instance are “We don’t need no education, We don’t need no thought control”. In chapter 13 Offred and other soon-to-be Handmaids are Testifying, speaking about horrible things that happened to them in the past, the example given is of Janine who shares that she was gang-raped at fourteen and had to have an abortion. In response to Janine’s statement Aunt Helena prompts the group by saying “But whose fault was it?” and the women respond with “Her fault, her fault, her fault” This degrading chant doesn’t end there, it continues when Aunt Helena asks another question “Who led them on?” already expecting an answer, the women say “She did. She did. She did” If that wasn’t enough Aunt Helen tears Janien down ever more by asking, “Why did God allow such a terrible thing to happen?” and the women respond “Teach her a lesson. Teach her a lesson. Teach her a lesson.” All of this is meant to make the women think of their situations as their own faults as if they are to blame for the things that have been done to them. It’s all a way to get a hold of their minds, to “control their thoughts” just as the Pink Floyd song repeats through its lyrics, constantly reminding the listener “We don’t need no thought control”. They are taught they are part of a system, part of the machine that is the government of Gilead, they are broken down via a warped, not just education, but re-education to make them think they are simply “just another brick in the wall”.

Linger - The Cranberries

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6Kspj3OO0s

In Gilead love is basically outlawed, it is a thing that only gets in the way of the system, as can be seen on page 220 when Atwood writes “Love, said Aunt Lydia with distaste. Don’t let me catch you at it”. Due to this fact, Offred’s only access to it is in her memories and “lingering” feelings. Offred is constantly reflecting on her relationship with Luke and the love she was once able to express freely in the before times. Linger by the Cranberries is about those feelings that are just hanging on and the massive effects they have on someone’s ability to function. In chapter 35 Offred reflects on the intricacies of love before Gilead, she reminds herself of the good and the bad. Linger is a melancholy song, a song of longing, a song where emotions that are slipping away but not gone yet are “tearing” the subject apart as the song describes. It’s about how these recurring feelings such as Offred’s constant reminder and reflections of love and loved ones. We see it tearing her apart, a line in the song, when she thinks of Luke and realizes that she’s slowly losing that wisp of a feeling when Offred says “And he was, the loved. One. I say. Is, is, only two letters, you stupid shit, can’t you manage to remember it, even a short word like that?”. You can see how much these vivid but distant memories are affecting her when Offred says “I wipe my sleeve across my face.” She is emotionally wounded by these feelings, and Linger reflects those emotions of not wanting memories to “fade” as Dolores O’Riordan the lead singer of the Cranberries emphasizes throughout the piece.

It’s A Man’s Man’s Man’s World - James Brown

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IvlioQ2Ot2c

James Brown’s It’s A Man’s Man’s Man’s World sounds on the surface to just be about the ways men rule the world. The ways men control everything, and everyone. Under the surface and within the lyrics through the song contains a theme that is subtly similarly present in The Handmaid’s Tale. In the song, James Brown sings “This is a man’s, man’s, man’s world. But it wouldn’t be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl” In The Handmaid’s Tale it is the men who hold the majority of the power, or at least they hold positions of theoretical power. Nonetheless, they hold the highest rank and therefore can get away with more and have different duties than others below them. The commanders perform the ceremonies, they oversee the house. Angels are allowed to hold guns. The men have the power in this society that is undeniable. At the same time none of the men of this society can have absolute power without the women of Gilead. Women play a crucial role in the world of Gilead even though it is structured by men. We see this theme when the commander requests to start seeing Offred alone in his quarters, they play scrabble and he requests a kiss, and says “Not like that,” he says. “As if you meant it.” like he has been missing any sort of real attention, any sort of true connections. We see how even in a society where the commanders who are men rule and have power and control they are unfulfilled and lonely, they lack companionship and real emotion even in a world where they run supreme it would be pointless without women, as James Brown says. None of it matters, “it wouldn’t be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl”.

Something in the way - Nirvana

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VxdufqB9zg

Offred’s dreams and memories constantly hunt her, they are relentless. Although they are hard to remember and hard to consider they keep her grounded they keep her from feeding into the manipulation of Gilead. It’s a wedge between her mind and their mold. It’s what the song Something In The Way by Nirvana reminds me of. The song is dreary and repetitive just like Offred’s circumstances, the same boring things every day, and the only thing that stands “in the way” are her memories, the things that make her an individual, the individual Gilead is trying to strip away. Offred is in her room when she reflects on some traumatic events that led to the place she is now and she realizes “I don’t want to be telling this story. I don’t have to tell it. I don’t have to tell anything, to myself or to anyone else. I could just sit here, peacefully. I could withdraw.” but in saying this, in not wanting to tell her stories, the something that Nirvana repeats slips away and she thinks “Why fight?”. This song both in its lyrics and musical elements reflects Offred’s mindset in relation to her memories and the painful benefits they have in keeping her an individual.

Stronger Than Me - Amy Winehouse

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6N6IjW-2fb4

The handmaids are expected to be simply a vessel for childbirth. They are expected. The aunts are expected to be forceful and constantly forcing Gilead propaganda down your throat. The guardians are meant to be courteous and respectful. The commanders are expected to do their “job”. Everyone in The Handmaid’s Tale is supposed to be something. Stronger than Me by Amy Winehouse is about the expectations in gender roles, Winehouse throughout the song says things like “All I need is for my man to live up to his role” and “You should be stronger than me”. Harping on the expectations she has for the role of a man. I feel like this heavily relates to the ways Gilead expects the people enslaved by its ideology to act and to be. Gildeasd expects the women to be childbirths, to only exist to have commander babies as is shown in the line from one of Offred’s thoughts “We are containers, it’s only the insides of our bodies that are important.” Sometimes expectations base all a person is, in the song Winehouse only talks about the expectations hse has and how the man isn’t living up to them, it’s the same in Gilead, the women are their expectations and if they live up to them or not.

Offred’s switch

IMG_0010
IMG_0010

In chapter 41 in The Handmaid’s Tale, Offred begins the chapter by talking about how she wishes her story was different and more “civilized.” “I wish it showed me in a better light, if not happier, then at least more active, less hesitant, less distracted by trivia,” she goes on to say on page (267). Offred clearly states how she is unhappy with the way her story sounds and wishes it could be better when she tells it but like she says on page (267) “I’m sorry there is so much pain in this story… but there is nothing I can do to change it.” She’s aware she can’t change the horrors of her story but she continues to apologize and tell the readers she wishes it was better. My drawing represents chapter 41 but specifically page (268) where Offred begins to refer to the reader as “you.” She says “because after all I want you to hear it, as I will hear yours too if I ever get the chance, if I meet you or you escape, in the future or in heaven or in prison or underground…” Throughout the book she’s been speaking and telling her story but she has never directly spoken to the reader as “you” which makes me question who exactly she’s telling this story to. I would’ve originally continued to think she was talking to the ready but when she says about seeing “you” again it makes me think she is talking to Aunt Lydia or someone from her past. But then she also says “ I am coming to a part that you will not like at all, because in it I did not behave well, but I will try nonetheless to leave nothing out,” which makes me think she is talking to Luke because she continued on telling the story about her and Nick. Luke and Offred used to be together so the only logical explanation as to why “you” wouldn’t like what she has to say is if she was talking to Luke. During our class discussion, my classmates brought up the point that maybe she’s speaking to multiple people. Maybe she isn’t just speaking to the reader or to Luke, or even Aunt Lydia. That could be the case but I believe that she is talking to one person. I believe that if she really is only talking to one person then she is talking to Luke. Offred always speaks about Luke and how he would feel about certain things and how she misses him. She speaks about how she doesn’t know if he is alive or dead so on page (268) when she says “ By telling you anything at all I’m at least believing in you, I believe you’re there, I believe you into being. Because I tell you this story I will your existence,” which means that writing this could be her way of coping with the fact that she doesn’t know if he’s dead or alive. By saying “ by telling this story I’m willing you into existence,” could be her way of creating a sense of hope that he’s still alive. My art shows Offred in the middle surrounded by three main people: the readers, Luke, and Aunt Lydia. This is there to show that she is speaking to other people other than the reader. I chose to do only Offred in color to show how she is the main focus.

Antagonist or Sympathetic Character

In The Handmaid’s Tale, I’ve come to realize the Commander is a very unique and complex character. When reading scenes involving the Commander, it’s hard to tell whether he’s a sympathetic character or the main antagonist. It’s easy for me to sympathize with him but it’s also easy for me to see him as the bad guy. Offred often feels sympathy for the Commander but, like me, she also understands that he is the main reason for his unhappiness because he built the system. Throughout chapter 36-38, the Commander takes Offred to Jezabel’s. Jezabel’s is described as a “brothel” or a “sex club” in which women are taken to by powerful men or even sent there if they are acting rebellious instead of being sent to the colonies. I want to really talk about chapter 37. Offred goes through similar emotions as me when trying to understand whether Jezabel’s could be a better choice for women instead of going to the colonies or if it’s just another way men take over women and objectify them. It’s so hard for me to read about the women walking around like objects and having to be okay with it. On page 235, she says “Some of them have on outfits like mine, feathers and glister, cut high up the thighs, low over the breasts. Some are in olden-days lingerie, shortie nightgowns, baby-doll pajamas, the occasional see through negligee. Some are in bathing suits, one piece or bikini; one, I see, is wearing a crocheted affair, with big scallop shells covering the tits.” The way these women are being objectified and used is infuriating to me. It makes me mad at the Commander. I was excited for offred to be taken out by the commander and made me have hope that the commander is a good guy and wanted to do something nice for offred but the fact that he took her here makes me think it was for himself just as much, or even more, then it was for Offred. I feel as though he’s taken advantage of Offred because he knew she hasn’t been out and dressed up in such a long time, so he knew she would go and he also knows that she can’t refuse to go because he has the power. “Well, what do you think of our little club,” he says on page 236. “His voice sounds pleased, delighted even,” says offred on 235. He says this expecting her to say she likes it and that it’s nice. He says it in such a proud tone that makes me think he is not only showing her off but he wants her to see the power he has and that he can break rules without being caught. Overall, it’s clear that I struggle with the idea that the Commander is a sympathetic character but I also struggle with the idea that he’s only the main antagonist. I’ve come to the conclusion that the world is not only black and white so why should it be in Gilead. I know some people in my life that are good people who do bad things so I also know that the commander can be one of those people.

The Power Of Songs

SAYGRACE - You Don’t Own Me ft. G-Eazy (Official Video)

The Commander in The Handmaids acts like he owns Offred. There are times when Offred feels sorry for him and views him as a victim of Gilead, just as she is. Throughout the novel, however, it becomes clear through their interactions that the Commander is using his power over Offred for his own gain. He doesn’t see her as an equal but as an instrument for his own pleasure. The text states “Maybe none of this is about control.Maybe it isn’t really about who can own whom, who can do what to whom and get away with it, even as far as death.(135).He knows that this is wrong but continues to do so in order to show that he is in control of that relationship and can end it when ever he wants.

Michael Jackson - Human Nature (Audio)

In The Handmaid’s Tale, the author constantly uses human nature to analyze internal conflict in Offred. She tries to decide if she should give into the new ways of Gilead or if she should try to rebel against the regime. She doesn’t know what happened to her husband Luke and she is trying to contain some type of real-life mentality. Offred feels so bad because she doesn’t know what happened to her husband Luke. This song basically talks about how if you tend to do wrong things it’s not that big of a deal because everyone will end up doing something wrong in their life.

I’m Gonna Miss You - Milli Vanilli

This song represents the relationship between Offred and Moria, she is Offred oldest and best friend, she is often seen in many of Offred’s memories, in Gilead the two meet at the Red Centre and then again at Jezebel’s. Moira is an unconventional character, she is outspoken and rebellious. Throughout the text, their friendship represents true female friendship and Offred does not have many friends that she can trust. The song has one lyric that is repeated throughout the song, “and I never will forget the day we met, girl i’m gonna miss you”, this is how Offred felt when Moria escaped. The tone of the song is very slow-paced and has a sad track this can represent the feeling of how a person might feel when losing someone that is really important or close to them.

Brandy & Monica - The Boy Is Mine (Official Video)

This song is about two women fighting over one guy, this can be related back to Offred and The Commander’s relationship, he is married to Serena Joy but has this secret relationship that no one knows about with Offred. The women in the song go back and forth about who’s actually in the relationship with the guy, they both think that they have more grip on the guy and the song ends with both of them saying “The boy is mine”.This represents how the relationship between both The Commander and Offred and The Commander and Serena Joy are not strong relationships and he can keep going back to either one with no punishment.

Mint Condition - Breakin’ My Heart (Pretty Brown Eyes) (Official Music Video)

This song is ultimately representing The Commander and Serena Joy’s relationship,he continues to cheat on her with Offred and it doesn’t really seem to have an effect on him. He is careless with Offred making her risk her life multiple times for his own pleasure and personal gain. He has more power over Offred making her do things that she does not want to do. He is not loyal to his wife and he is breaking her heart,becuase in a marriage you are supported to have trust and The Commander isn’t really a trustworthy person.

The game of Life

In chapter 23, we read about a significant moment in The Handmaid’s Tale, Offred’s ability to experience and do something forbidden to the women in Gilead. Which is reading and writing. That is exactly what we see her do throughout this chapter, which stuck out to me. On page 138 we got to see the Commander ask Offred to play Scrabble. However, in the reading, it is described as, “It’s something different. Now it’s forbidden, for us. Now it’s dangerous. Now it’s indecent. Now it’s something he can’t do with his Wife. Now it’s desirable. Now he’s compromised himself. It’s as if he’s offered me drugs.” The comparison to being offered drugs is one that you can’t make often. The way Offred is describing this, you would think they would avoid playing it at all costs. That does not seem to be the case here though for Offred and the Commander. After reading this I felt confused as to why he would risk himself and Offred for a boring game of Scrabble. Such a small and silly thing could ruin Offred’s life, even though she wasn’t the one to make the choice. “All right,” I say, as if indifferent. I can in fact hardly speak.” Offred’s reaction makes me think she was also in disbelief that he would ask her that, by stating her inability to speak. I thought this part was intriguing because we assume Offred cannot say no, because of the repercussions. But I was confused as to why she did not fight to turn his forbidden offer down because it is something that if it were to be discovered the outcome would be plenty dangerous and bad. I wondered if she was suspicious of him if she doubted her trust in coming to see him. But I also think about how she could be terrified to say something, and like usual, she just gives in to what is asked. As for the Commander, I also questioned his motive, and I was interested to know his intentions. I thought that maybe he could be using this as bait, to see if she’ll fall into this trap. Of doing something she’s not allowed to do and is forbidden. What would he do with her if that was the case? If this was all just a set-up? I felt scared for Offred, for what could come. With something like this, all sorts could go wrong. However, I believe there has to be a reason why he would want to play Scrabble. Another reason why this intrigued me was because I thought he could be doing this as a way of wanting to help Offred out. The handmaids are not allowed to do much, so I think this could be his way of giving her some sort of entertainment, an “out.” Maybe he happens to be one who still has a bit of sympathy and can feel for Offred. Maybe he wants her to feel like she has some sort of potential to do more, to do the things that are forbidden. Freedom. But why? What could be his reasoning? I was still confused because, despite all of this, I thought, what if someone caught them? What if someone were to catch them in the act, playing this? Things would not play out well for either of them, and it would only make matters worse.

Distraction is King

In The Handmaid’s Tale, Offred often experiences bouts of nostalgia, where she will go deep into her own mind. She thinks about the good and the bad times—though I think she recounts more good than bad—from the before times. She recounts stories from childhood with her mother, from a secret relationship with Luke, from a public relationship with Luke, and from being a mother. Margaret Atwood, the author of the Handmaid’s Tale, will often start these stories abruptly. Atwood will write about Offred and her companion, Ofglen walking to the market, and then Offred will recount a memory, somewhat randomly. Atwood writes, “Ofglen and I walk slowly today; we are hot in our long dresses, wet under the arms, tired… There used to be an ice cream store, somewhere in this block. I can’t remember the name… We would go there, when [my daughter] was little, and I’d hold her up so she could see through the glass side of the counter, where the vats of ice cream were on display, colored so delicately, pale orange, pale green, pale pink, and I’d read the names to her so she could choose. She wouldn’t choose by the name, though, but by the color. Her dresses and overalls were those colors too. Ice cream pastels” (164-165). This story, about an ice cream shop that no longer exists, and a daughter that, to Offred, no longer exists, comes to her after seeing a reminder of a previous time. This is interesting to me because instead of seeing something and moving on, she stays with the memory for as long as she can. Offred’s train of thought is powerful because she will give into it more than other people might. I also have this experience, because a lot of times I will distract myself with the first thing that comes to mind. When I was younger, this manifested itself in playing pretend games in my head, and now it manifests itself as getting distracted easily while doing work, and having a hard time getting back on task. I think I do this because my brain naturally turns away from the things it finds unfulfilling. For example, when I am doing math homework or chores, I’m not thinking about math or the trash, I’m thinking about summer camp or the last dentist appointment I had. These distractions reward my efforts. For all the grinding I’m doing with calculus or emptying the dishwasher, I at least can remember swimming with my friends and how clean my teeth felt. For Offred, I think this is similar. Gilead is such a cruel world, and Offred does not enjoy it. She distracts herself with memories of her past, which she enjoyed significantly more, even though she might not always recognize it. Atwood writes, “There seemed no end to [Luke]. We would lie in those afternoon beds, afterwards, hands on each other, talking it over. Possible, impossible. What could be done? We thought we had such problems. How were we to know we were happy?” (51). Offred recognizes that she was happier in a past life, where she wasn’t forced to give birth to babies that weren’t hers and perform rituals she probably would’ve called crazy as a teenager. Even though she knows that she can’t get back to her happier past life by thinking about it, she still does. Even though I know that I can’t stop doing my homework because I’m daydreaming about the summer time, I still do. We do these things as a form of escapism. We don’t like the current situation we’re in—although mine is quite a bit less dire than hers is—so we make up a new one from our heads that we’ve experienced before. Offred’s thoughts often end up straying to four characters: Her daughter, her mother, Luke, and Moira. These characters keep coming up both logistically (where has Luke ended up?) and emotionally (I hope my daughter is alive). These characters in her life are Offred’s chosen form of escapism because she loves and cares about them. It’s a lot easier for her mind to first wander to topics she thinks might cheer her up, when in the end, they might do more harm than good. This is because she spirals when she thinks about them, like when she imagined Luke dead or locked away somewhere. I also tend to spiral, and mine also tends to be about the stress of living and the wellbeing of loved ones. Offred and I both ‘escape’ to places in our minds, but it doesn’t necessarily make us feel better.

Under His Eye - Ezra Goldenberg

Under His Eye
Under His Eye

Artist’s Statement:

My artwork, titled Under His Eye, depicts Commander Fred casting a large shadow on the wall behind him. The shadow, however, is not the same silhouette that the commander would normally project. The looming shadow on the wall has large angel-like wings, with a large piercing eye in the center, resembling the symbol of Gilead, the symbol of the soul scrolls, and the Eyes.

Throughout the story, the commander has become more and more humanized as the reader learns more and more about him. However, this humanization comes with the realization that the Commander played an integral role in bringing about the Republic of Gilead. It can be easy to forget how dangerous he is, how influential he is, and how much he is to blame for the current state of the world. Him casting Gilead’s shadow represents his involvement and role in upholding the oppressive regime. The wings on the commander could also make him look like an angel. This plays into the way Gilead views itself. Like many governments and people in power, Gilead is very religious and believes it is carrying out God’s will. The commanders are the saviors, the angels, to guide the people to a better way of life.

The eye is also there to represent the unknown danger of the Eyes. The reader knows the commander has to keep his law breaking a secret, but they still do not know who he is hiding it from. He is afraid of being caught by someone, but so far the only authority that the reader has been introduced to that could possibly be above such a high ranking commander is the mysterious Eyes. A higher ranking class than the commanders would change the way the reader views the current government, as well

The color of the eye in the middle of the shadow is brown. One of the most oppressive parts of the Republic of Gilead is the way it forces the individuality out of someone, and forces you to become nothing more than the role you are assigned. The handmaidens are not supposed to talk to anyone, look at anyone, dress how they want, and more. It is only fitting that the eye symbolizing this government would be the least unique possible.

The piece is titled Under His Eye for multiple reasons, and offers multiple interpretations. One of which is that the “He” refers to God. This is perhaps the more obvious one, as Gilead is a Christian government, but it carries an important message of fear and control. The other interpretation is that “He” refers to the commander. This is more applicable to the story, as Offred constantly has to tiptoe around Commander Fred and be careful that she isn’t being watched. The “He” could also be an Eye, as we have only ever heard Offred speculate on men being Eyes, never women. Throughout all three examples, the title represents the natural fear of authority and control that Gilead instills in all of the people being oppressed by it.

My Link

For my second Lit Log on The Handmaid’s Tale, I decided to write about a section of the story that resonates with me. The section in question takes place during the beginning of Chapter 25.

Offred wakes up, halfway in her cupboard instead of in bed. Cora was in the room, dropping the breakfast tray because of the sight before her. She thought Offred had run off, or even died.

After both of the women recollected themselves, Cora started to clean up the spilled food. They knew that too many questions would surround them if anybody knew about this incident. “I saw that it would be better if we could both pretend I’d eaten my breakfast after all [p.152],” Offred thought to herself.

Cora tells Offred that she’ll say the tray was dropped on the way out. That she’ll lie for her. “It pleased me that she was willing to lie for me, even in such a small thing, even for her own advantage. It was a link between us [p.152].”

This section stood out to me, as I’ve experienced links like this before. Links that are specific from person-to-person. Links that aren’t exactly in spite of someone or something else, but in support of dealing with them. They are often out of dishonesty, like this incident with Cora and Offred. But in return, a link between yourself and another will always make you closer.

My strongest example would be with my brother and our dad. My dad often checks my room during the evening to make sure that I’m doing my homework. Doesn’t matter which type of homework I’m doing, just that I’m doing it. One day though, I suppose he was just lazy because he decided to yell across the hallway instead of walking over.

“Is Xavier doing his work?” he shouted.

At that time, my brother and I were chatting and laughing about something random, being unproductive. I was at my desk with my computer shut, and he was sitting on my bed. I knew that I should have started my work by now. In fact, it was after 5:30 and my alarm for it had already gone off. What my brother did next surprised me, though.

“Yeah, he is.” my brother said to my dad. “He is doing his work.”

This moment is the connection I made to The Handmaid’s Tale. My brother pretty much lied for me, even though it wouldn’t have cost much for him to tell my dad the truth. “Even in such a small thing.”

It does get more complicated than that, however. While I didn’t start my homework, my brother was also the one conversing with me in the first place. It’s similar to how Cora would’ve never dropped her tray if Offred had just gone to sleep as normal. They were both factors in this situation. They were in this together. There was a link.

Between the story and my own experience, the actual stakes have both similarities and differences. Offered mentioned that “Rita would get surly if she had to cook a second breakfast [p.152],” and the same would go for my dad if he had to tell me himself to do my work. But then I would have to ask, why would they get “surly?”

With my dad, it’s about discipline and integrity. Being able to have responsibility on my own, for when I eventually leave this house and live my own life. Or at least prove to him that I have responsibility, rather. With Rita, however, it could be more due to the world they are living in. Gilead is such a stricter and ordered place than the one we live in now. It’s more run by fear than integrity. I would argue integrity barely matters at all, actually, with the clubs and Mayday resistance existing. But with so many live-or-death decisions surrounding these characters, little mishaps like ruining a breakfast simply can’t afford to happen as much as they do in real life. They have to be hidden.

Knowing the consequences of the truth, significant or insignificant, is what I believe creates the strongest link between people. The link is especially evident when they do not have to tell each other about the consequences directly. Sometimes–even if the means of achieving them are dishonest–there are just better outcomes. Both of the people involved, those people that have a link, will know that.

“Well, get to it.” my brother said, walking out of my room.

A Handmaid's Playlist

A Handmaid’s Playlist

The Wall - STOP TRYING TO BE GOD by Travis Scott In the first few chapters of The Handmaid’s Tale Offred and Ofglen come upon The Wall. A large wall of stone, with bodies hung from hooks sprawled across it. The wall represents power and the extreme control that the Republic of Gilead has over individuals, especially the handmaids. In “STOP TRYING TO BE GOD,” Scott reflects on the dangers of trying to play an omnipotent role, the illusion of control, and the consequences of overreaching one’s power. This closely corresponds with themes in The Handmaid’s Tale because the Republic attempts to play “God” by controlling the bodies of the handmaids and every aspect of their lives. Scott says, “It’s never love, no matter what you try,” which connects to parts of the novel where the higher-ups try and play off the strict commandments of the government as love and good for them. They would use the media or pornographic magazines to dismay the handmaids, trying to convince them that the old world was worse and that they were better off now. Offred talks about a specific moment when she was looking for her daughter and they tell her that “She’s in good hands,” and “With people who are fit,” (39). The Republic of Gilead continues to play “God” and Scott advises against that in his song because “they might never see it coming back.”

The Birth - Drew Barrymore by SZA In The Handmaid’s Tale, the handmaids are used as vessels to carry the children of their Commander. The time it takes for one of them to become impregnated varies but eventually, one handmaid will become pregnant and the day of the birth will come due. They treat the births of the handmaids very ritualistically, chanting and mimicking the breathing of the handmaid as she attempts to bring the child into the world. The handmaids are forced to give birth under oppressive conditions, where their bodies are controlled, and the act of childbirth is stripped of its personal meaning. The handmaids aren’t even allowed to name their child and that power falls to the wife of the commanders. In “Drew Barrymore,” SZA expresses feelings of insecurity, worthlessness, and not being in control of her own worth or value, themes that reflect the emotional isolation and objectification that the handmaids experience. Lines like, “Is it warm enough for you inside me?” or “I get so lonely, I forget what I’m worth,” mirror the emotional impact of what being a handmaid is like. While “Drew Barrymore” is a more personal experience, its exploration of self-worth and vulnerability parallel the emotional trauma and loss of identity that the handmaids endure.

Alone With The Commander - No Role Modelz by J. Cole Between chapters 22-25, Offred begins meeting the Commander after dark. Their interactions are all very strange and new for Offred because she knows he is breaking some of the laws he put into place to spend time with her. Most surprising of all for her is that during his time alone with her out of everything he could ask, he asked to play Scrabble. Their relationship through the next few meetings changes slowly and the Commander becomes more intimate as Offred begins to become more worried about someone noticing or the Commander suddenly changing his mind about their scheduled time together. The song “No Role Modelz,” by J. Cole closely relates to the themes of power dynamics, manipulation, and exploitation of Offred during her time with the Commander. In the song, Cole reflects on the stupidity of relationships, manipulation, and the emptiness of power-driven interactions. The relationship between Offred and the Commander is full of manipulation and how the Commander uses his position of power to draw Offred into a personal-like relationship outside her regular duties, blurring the lines between consent and coercion. Some lines from the song like “Don’t save her, she don’t wanna be saved,” touch on the false sense of “saving” that the Commander thinks he’s providing to Offred by treating her special, like playing Scrabble, giving her small gifts, or taking her out even though she is still trapped in oppression. Another strong line from the song is, “Fool me one-time shame on you, fool me twice, can’t put the blame on you,” reflects Offred’s growing awareness of the Commander’s manipulation, as she becomes more disillusioned with the Commander and the false sense of security he tries to offer.

Offred & Nick - L$D by A$AP Rocky Offred and Nick’s relationship is ever-growing throughout the book. It went from simple interactions to small contact, to a deeper connection between the two. Most of the rest came due to Serena Joy suggesting Nick as a replacement for the commander as she knows that he has a better chance of impregnating her than the commander. “L$D” by A$AP Rocky (which stands for Love, Sex, and Dreams) explores themes of passionate but complicated love, confusion, and emotional intensity—feelings that mirror Offred’s ever-growing feelings for Nick. Their relationship in the earlier chapters is secretive and contributes to the idea of forbidden desires, which fits the emotional ambiguity captured in “L$D.” Rocky blends emotional and physical desire in his song and their relationship begins with a sense of physical need but develops into a more emotional bond. Her interactions with Nick offer her an escape from Gilead’s oppressive reality, giving her a brief feeling of control. In the song, there’s a sense of escaping into love and desire, as Rocky compares his relationship to a drug-induced haze. His use of the lines, “I introduce her to this hippy life, we make love under pretty lights,” and “Make no mistakes, it’s all, a leap of faith for love, it takes place in, feelin’ that you crave doin’ love, sex, dreams,” capture the dreamy, intense, and slightly surreal mix with the danger, desire, and emotional uncertainty that defines Offred and Nick’s relationship in the earlier parts of The Handmaid’s Tale.

   The Handmaid's Tale - United in Grief by Kendrick Lamar

Throughout the entire novel, the handmaids deal with oppressive societal factors that change how they live their lives. Each handmaid has gone through some form of nonconsensual matters and dealt with difficult moments that caused them to become who they are. “United in Grief,” by Kendrick Lamar is the start of his album “Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers” and serves as an intro to Lamar’s therapy journey, detailing his faults and insecurities. The song starts with a voice saying to “tell them the truth,” and “tell them your truth,” which relates to how the handmaids want to hear the voices of each other and want to be able to tell their own truth but can’t because of Gilead. Lamar says, “I’ve been goin’ through somethin’ one thousand, eight hundred and 55 days, I’ve been going’ through something,” which connects to how each of the handmaids is going through some form of oppression for a long time and still can’t speak out against it. Every handmaid feels stuck in the societal norms of Gilead, united in grief.

STOP TRYING TO BE GOD - https://youtu.be/AcXp7m1g5yE?si=Gr1Bl31P1vuoss5l

Drew Barrymore - https://youtu.be/gANgH6gmWh4?si=QCy3c0rDJY7-_rMU

No Role Modelz - https://youtu.be/0EnRK5YvBwU?si=Zyb8pWJuF9YNEbqB

L$D - https://youtu.be/GEgkA3sXk7c?si=3QpsTPKMpj4k0xqd

United in Grief - https://youtu.be/tvNSXS4x9nc?si=fB_2ZjjCHLJhzbi9

Differently Different.

While reading The Handmaid’s Tale, the Pages 134–137 makes me wonder, what makes a story worth telling? What makes a story believable and different from the rest of the crowd? Something that makes me wonder this and not only that, but, relate to it is when Offered said this; “It’s impossible to say a thing exactly the way it is, because what you say can never be exact, you always have to leave something out, there are too many parts, sides, crosscurrents, nuances, too many gestures, which could mean this or that, too many shapes which can never be fully described, too many flavors, in the air or on the tongue, half-colors, too many.” q. – 134. This made me think back onto what my Grandma said. I remember a time where my Mother was trying to figure out who drank her soda and I got so frustrated although I didn’t do it, but my Grandmother said to me, “As long as you didn’t do it, you have nothing to be worried about, no matter how many times you get accused of it.” And in this moment when reading this chapter that’s all that filled my mind. Page 136 is where I started to question things and I started to feel intrigued but not in a happy way. In the middle section of the chapter, before reading it, what catches my attention is when Offred says, “We are for breeding purposes: we aren’t concubines, geisha girls, courtesans. On the contrary: everything has been done to remove us from that category. There is supposed to be nothing entertaining about us, no room is to be permitted for the flowering of secret lusts; no special flavors are to be wheedle, by them or us, there are to be no toeholds wombs, that’s all: sacred vessels, ambulatory chalices. So why does he want to see me, at night, alone?” and that made me feel uneasy. What did she mean? That’s all I could think of at first but as I took notes and really thought more about this; Offred was right. To me she was objectifying herself but she was also correct. In Gilead the women are used for pleasure, entertainment, and labor, and not only that but many of them are brainwashed into believing that this is how life is supposed to be due to God wanting this for women, while as for the rest, they believe that they are being punished or put through a test or lesson. As I continue reading page 136, Offred states how she could become an “Un-Woman”, what is that? She refers to this after saying how if she’d get caught by Serena Joy (SJ). She then states that if she chooses to not see the Commander, there could be worse consequences that come her way. I guess this would make sense because he has more power than her, their dynamic is awkward, sometimes it seems like the Commander has less power than she does, but that’s for another moment. “There’s no doubt who holds the real power,” Offred quotes on page 136. Something that I did think about was how Offred says that the Commander must be weak or expressing a weakness, to want something is to be weak. “But there must be something he wants, from me. To want is to have a weakness. It’s this weakness, whatever it is, that entices me. It’s like a small crack in a walk, before now impenetrable. If I press my eye to it, this weakness of his, I may be able to see my way clear. I want to know what he wants.” What I find to be intriguing about this is the more we read into Offred’s mind, the more she talks about how she’s never been in the forbidden room, not even Serena Joy (SJ) has been inside of this room. And not only that, it’s only ever cleaned by the Guardians. On page 137, Offred describes the room, but then says how she might just cry and the Commander seems very empathetic. Like huh? This confused me. I thought Commanders were supposed to be stern and clear with their intent– only follow orders. He gives her a frown and offers her a seat, he literally pulls the chair out for her to sit. He then smiles at her and she describes it as a normal smile… nothing suspicious. I fell off– what did he really want from Offred and why was he only doing this to her? What made her different from the rest? What made her stand out?

Under Pressure: Serena Joy’s Dangerous Manipulation of Offred in The Handmaid’s Tale

The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood addresses how people around you can greatly influence you into doing something you aren’t too comfortable doing just for their benefit. In the book, Serena Joy is trying her best to manipulate Offred to cheat on the Commander with Nick. Serena Joy is getting very impatient with the Commander, who has not been able to get Offred pregnant. But Offred was not comfortable with it because she knew that she couldn’t get pregnant by anyone that isn’t the Commander. After all, if it came out, it could leave her with a great punishment, which could even lead to death. We see this kind of manipulation most clearly in the scene where Serena Joy tells Offred that she is getting impatient with her and that the Commander is still not able to get Offred pregnant. So Serena comes up with a plan that Offred would have an affair and get pregnant by somebody else. Offred is hesitant because she tells Serena, “It’s against the law. You know the penalty,” which is exile to the colonies and death. This is when the manipulation begins. Serena helps ease Offred by saying “Women do it frequently. All the time.” Serena is saying that she wants to use Offred even if it puts Offred at huge risk. Serena is minimizing the risks of this illegal act by the old “everybody does it” logical fallacy. “But it’s done,” Serena says as a way of providing proof that they can get away with it successfully. She offers Ofwarren as a successful example. She doesn’t, however, mention any times when this kind of plan went wrong, which is why this is her manipulating Offred by leaving out any possibility that they will get caught. Then, Serena manipulates her further by saying that Serena would make sure they didn’t get caught. Then, she adds, “The Wife knew, of course… .I will help you. I would make sure nothing went wrong.” Of course, there are no guarantees that she could do this, and if they did get caught she would deny everything and only Offred would be punished. Offred is pulled into the plan by Serena’s manipulation, even to the point where she imagines that they are only girlfriends who are talking about boys. “…for this moment at least we are cronies, this could be a kitchen table, it could be a date we’re discussing, some girlish stratagem of ploys and flirtation.” Serena has no interest in Offred’s well-being, she’s only using this to make more of a reason for Offred to trust her by making it seem like they are in the same team working together when in reality they never could be friends because of the widely different roles they play. She continues with the “we are in this together” attitude when Offred asks, “What about the Commander?” Serena replies, “We just won’t tell him, will we?” Serena reassures Offred that she has this planned out and that they will have each other’s backs no matter what.
Of course, Offred has her reasons for wanting this plan. She knows that if she doesn’t get pregnant soon they will blame her and send her off to the colonies anyway, and she is attracted to Nick, who Serena suggests as the possible one to get her pregnant. But even here, we can see Serena’s manipulation. Serena must know that Offred is attracted to him, and she might even have used him before, as Offred suspects: “Is this what he always gets, in return” for running black-market errands, Offred wonders. Serena has essentially hemmed Offred in while making it seem they both came up with this plan and agreed to it, even though Offred has no real choice. If she says no, Serena could accuse her of all sorts of things. If she doesn’t get pregnant, bad things will happen, and if she goes through with it, the consequences are just as bad. Throughout the book, Serena uses her influence on people to get what she desires, without care or thought about how it can harm others in the long term.

What's Love?

While reading “The Handmaid’s Tale” Written by Margaret Atwood, I was specifically intrigued by a certain passage in the book. This specific section runs from page 225-227 and it is a scene where Offred, the main character, speaks on love and how she experienced it. This particular section sparked my interest because of the lack of love throughout Gilead. Yeah the wives “love” their Commanders, but for the most part, it seems as though the Commanders don’t necessarily love their wives according to Offred’s perspective on love, and my personal perspective on the concept of love. Offred’s commander, also known as Serena Joy’s husband has been secretly having Offred come and visit him, and he’d ask Offred for kisses, and indirectly ask for sexual relations with Offred. The commander stole Serena Joy’s costumes and makeup, and used them for Offred, to show her off at a nightclub earlier on in the book. In the specific section I chose to examine, the commander originally suggests that they speak about love, something that is somewhat “forbidden” in the world of Gilead. When reading, I thought it was strange. Why is the Commander speaking on a forbidden subject? Offred goes on to explain that she in fact enjoys speaking about love, because of her “experience” with love. On 225 she states “That’s better. That’s something I know about. We can talk about that.” This quote is suggesting that she loved before she became a handmaid. Throughout the novel Offred speaks a lot about a man named Luke. They were a couple, and they had a child together. She enjoys reminiscing about Luke and their good memories, but when it becomes bad memories, she seems to not enjoy that. Just like she analyzes her past memories and experiences with Luke, she analyzes the idea of love. Also on 225 Atwood writes, “Falling in love. I said. Falling into it, we all did then, one way or another…It was the central thing.; it was the way you understood yourself; If it never happened to you, not ever, you would be like a mutant, a creature from outer space. Everyone knew that.” When analyzing this quote it made me realize that in the world of Gilead, before the government shut down and everything changed, love was normalized. Everyone was either in love, or had loved before, and if you weren’t in love, you were inhumane. She then goes on to note that falling for “him” was so “dire, extreme and unlikely.” Those three important words suggest that maybe REAL love was hard to find, but fake love just to “fit in” or “look the part” was the love that everyone was experiencing. When reading The Handmaid’s Tale, it’s hard to miss the religious aspects of the story. Offred states that “God is Love.” This represents the power that love holds on people. Offred was a hard lover in her past life because of the things she did to protect herself and her family. Pre- Gilead times, Offred, Luke and their daughter were trying to escape and Offred gave her daughter sleeping medication, so they’d have a better chance at saving themselves when crossing the border. On page 84, in chapter 14 Atwood wrote “ And I don’t want her to feel frightened, to feel the fear that’s now tightening my muscles, tensing my spine, pulling me so taut that I’m certain I would break if touched.” This is a scene where we can tell Offred is trying to protect her loved ones, and that her love for Luke, and her daughter was so strong. On page 226 through 227, Offred describes the three different scenarios of love. The type that comes and goes and is hard to remember, the act of falling in love, and abusive love. Offred states “you’d wake up in the middle of the night, when the moonlight was coming through the window onto his sleeping face… Likely you would think at those times: What if he doesn’t love me.”(226). Offred categorizes love because these are the ways she’s experienced love. Through this quote you can see that she has a lot of thoughts at night, just like throughout the novel, Offred would have her worst inner thoughts at nighttime. She tells herself not to believe the negative thoughts. He is in fact in love with you, she forced herself to believe. But maybe this isn’t true. On page 144, Aunt Lydia said “Men are sex machines. They only want one thing. You must learn to manipulate them, for your own good.” Is “your own good” love? The feeling of love? From reading this passage I can infer that women love to feel love, and love to be in love, even if that means sacrificing things like your emotional health? On 226 Offred says, “But all of that[the inner thoughts] was pertinent only in the night, and had nothing to do with the man you loved, at least in daylight. With that man you want it to work, to work out.” Offred was saying that the thoughts go away during the day because people want this idea of love to work out. Even if your thoughts are right. Even if the love isn’t there. Overall when reading this section, it made me see that in the world of Gilead, love is depicted differently, and from reading I could see just how complicated love is, and there is no real answer to the famous question of “What’s love?”

Shattered

“You can wet the rim of a glass and run your finger around the rim and it will make a sound. This is what I feel like: this sound of glass. I feel like the word shatter.” - page 103

The mind is a strange thing. It can use coping methods to make it through difficult times, but it can also delude. It can provide peace and solace, but it can also run amok with anxiety and stress about the future. The brain is so complex that it would be difficult to represent with a single image, but we try nonetheless. The artwork I created is an attempt to unpack the mind of Offred as the end of the narrative approaches.

Throughout the book, Offred uses the word “shatterproof” in relation to windows five times (as of the current reading)—on pages 8, 12, 52, and twice on 167. She mentions the word “shatter” even more often, and this repetition of her fixation on broken glass served as the main inspiration for this piece. Each shard of glass illustrates a different aspect of her mind—a memory, a thought to the future, or a single word—and at the center of the fragments is Offred herself, her internal exhaustion shown through her weary eyes. When initially drawing Offred’s face, I did not intend to make her appear old or wrinkled, but I feel that the final appearance connects strongly to how she sees herself as a Handmaid. She mentions on page 199 that “being a woman this way is how 1 used to imagine it would be to be very old.”

For the overall aesthetic of the artwork, I chose to use an airbrush to create vague, blurred shapes in each shard of glass. This decision allowed me to be more abstract with the artwork, and it was also a strong way to illustrate that these ideas floating around in Offred’s head are only reconstructions, not completely true representations of her thoughts or experiences. This, as a motif, is repeated several times in the narrative by Offred herself, so I felt that it would be important to refrain from creating crisp, clear images in the artwork.

The piece on the bottom right depicts a swarm of tiny Handmaids around the word “MAYDAY.” This is a representation of the Mayday rebellion, a mostly disorganized group of Handmaids that are trying to find a way to work against Gilead. Introduced to her through Ofglen, another Handmaid, Offred wants to help them by feeding information and doing what she can in her restrictive life. Another piece shows tendrils of smoke rising from a fire covering a house, a manifestation of Offred’s thoughts about burning the Commander’s house down and escaping: “Such a fine thought, it makes me shiver. An escape, quick and narrow” (209)

The remaining pieces contrast this looking forward, however; they represent Offred’s growing feeling of despair and powerlessness as she loses pieces of her past and is forced to reckon with her reality in Gilead. For example, one piece is an image of the Commander’s face, surrounded by Scrabble pieces that spell “Zilch.” Offred does directly spell out this word while playing Scrabble with the Commander on page 183, but I felt that it was a strong metaphor; zilch is defined as zero or nothing, and I used it to represent the idea that Offred feels helpless, both over her future and in the structure of Gilead as a whole.

Directly to the right of this, another shard of glass shows several twisting lengths of rope criss crossing through a dark void. In the background, the vague shape of a noose can be seen. This imagery was used to encompass all of Offred’s thoughts about the Handmaid that lived in her room before she did. She was initially a beacon of hope for Offred, leaving behind the message “Nolite te bastardes carborundorum,” meaning “Don’t let the bastards grind you down” (187). However, Offred later discovers through the Commander that the Handmaid hung herself to escape the dark reality of Gilead. She had held this Handmaid in her mind as an almost mythical figure, seeing her as an inspiration, and this news took that away. “Fat lot of good it did her,” she remarks later in the story. “Why fight?” (225).

Above these, the next fragment depicts Ofwarren, the pregnant Handmaid shown in an earlier stage of the book. I included this to represent Offred’s thoughts on her place as a Handmaid, but also as a reminder that she does not have much time left to fulfill her “purpose” in this society, the one enforced upon her by Gilead: giving birth. This idea is reinforced several times throughout the narrative by a variety of characters, from her doctor (page 61) to Serena Joy (page 204), and this serves to encourage Offred to do whatever it takes to have a child, even if she does not want to. She has little agency in the grand scheme of things, and this erodes her sense of self.

Another piece depicts blurred white figures with a faint glow. This represents Offred’s memories of her family before Gilead, of Luke and their daughter—on page 193, she attempts to remember them, but “they fade, though I stretch out my arms towards them, they slip away from me, ghosts at daybreak.” This is an attempt to look into the past, to fall back on fond reminiscence, but it doesn’t work; Offred has been overtaken by Gilead and cannot go back.

The glass shard in the top right corner shows the photo of Offred’s daughter that she receives from Serena Joy on page 228. She had been hoping to find her, even just see her one more time, for the entire story, but when she is given the photo, this optimism melts away. “You can see it in her eyes: I am not there,” she thinks. “I can’t bear it, to have been erased like that” (228). The word “OBLITERATED” floats above the photo, emphasizing that Offred feels her daughter has forgotten her. This is one of the most powerful pieces of imagery in the story, and it is one of the most effective at battering down Offred’s hope for the future. This goal she had been searching for the entire book has, in her eyes, been for nothing.

Finally, directly above Offred’s head is a piece that shows a pair of rabbit ears on a headband. This is a reference to her final encounter with Moira at Jezebel’s, where Offred discovers that she has been . “She is frightening me now,” Offred thinks, “because what I hear in her voice is indifference, a lack of volition” (249). Moira has been a rebellious figure for the entire story, and has served as an inspiration for Offred as she worked with Ofglen and the Commander. In this final interaction, however, that spirit has been taken out of her, and this is one of the most damaging losses in the story. “I don’t want her to be like me. Give in, go along, save her skin… I want gallantry from her, swashbuckling, heroism, single-handed combat. Something I lack.” Another figure of hope in her life has been reduced, has lost an important piece of themselves, and this drives the stake of hopelessness even deeper into Offred’s mind.

This artwork is a culmination of Offred’s experiences in the story, a combination of little hopes and large despairs. I do not know what lies ahead for Offred, but I do not see a happy ending as very likely, given her loss of hope and agency.