Bam!! Bam!! That is how I am going against this dude with the baseball bat wrapped in the sharpest of barbed wire. I then jam the baseball bat up his rectum, and listen to the punk scream and cry. Just watching him beg for the mercy I refuse to give him. That’s not enough for this scumbag. I pick up the knife, and start stabbing him in the face as I think about how much I love my child. The man’s blood squirting on to my face. Can’t get it into my eyes. I then start chopping fingers off of his right hand as I hear his screams of pain. I know I am being just a tiny bit aggressive to this man. Why? Because this man tried to murder my 5 year old son, Jacob, at the store. He chased him with a chainsaw, and then attempted to gun him down with an M-16 until he found me. Why? Because the kid accidentally bumped into him. I was furious, but glad my son was not dead or injured.
Now, I caught the guy. I then kidnapped him, and drove him to my house. Now, I am stabbing his crotch. I hear this punk screaming, begging for mercy. Screaming louder with stab. Crying more with each swing to his groin and stomach. Blood pouring all over his Polo pants. I just start laughing. I love to see my enemies suffer. It’s hilarious to see the scream in pain, and make all of these weird noises. He than decides to bite me. I could feel those little squares going into my hand. He knows he messed up FOR REAL! I leave him out in the yard, and go in the house. When I get inside, I see a bottle of gasoline and a lighter. So, I grab them. I then go to the dude, and pour the gasoline in his mouth, and his wounds. Then, I light a match, and throw it in his mouth. Now, he will feel the burn my heart and mind would if my son was killed or dismembered. Since he accidentally swallowed some of the gasoline, there is a fire in his throat. That’s cool. I am doing this because I love my son so very much.
But, I see 4 SUVs, and then 5 people come out of each one. That’s 20 enemies. They all strapped. They are friends with the guy I had been beating up! Turns out, his name was Eruzo, and he ran a bank robbing organization! They are notorious for multiple robberies and homicides. Oh crap, this isn’t good. They all start shooting at me. The house is getting drenched in bullets, and my son is inside taking a nap!! He could get murdered!! I run inside, and grabbed my uzi, and my RPG. I then ran out ducking, and fired the RPG at one of the groups. I can see the heads and arms flying through the air, and blood is everywere. All over the lawn I work so hard to keep nice and pretty. I wish I could bring them back to life, tie them up, and slowly torture them for messing up my lawn.
Now, it’s Uzi time. I spray at all the dudes. The sound of the gunfire was beautiful. The screams of pain, as well as the sight of blood and brains fly in the air, were like music to my ears. Their bodies looked like they were covered in ketchup when I was finished. Except for 1 guy. He didn’t get hit with any bullets. Not one piece of drop of blood on his Versace shirt, his Gucci pants, or his Air Yeezies. That man must meet Satan today. There is no way I will let him get away with this crap. I just picked up the chainsaw, and start cutting his crotch area. It was like he started peeing blood. After that, I open his stomach up with it. Then, I sliced his body in half. He was screaming. I liked it at first, but then it got annoying. So I threw a brick at his head, and did it as hard as I could. Now he is finally dead, thank God. I see the other dude. His insides are still burning. I decided to just let him suffer. The more the suffering, the better the revenge.
I then realize I need to run away, and move!! My son is so innocent. He loves Halo and disney, and wants to be a superhero. So precious. I can’t let these dudes pull out their AKs and turn him into macaroni, so I then grab my son, and scream ¨We must run!!” So, I grab a bag full of guns, get my son, and we hop into my Maybach. We are moving to New York. That way, I won’t get arrested. But more importantly, my son can live. My son won’t have 27 holes in his head. I don’t want him dead. Now, it has been 4 months. I was only charged with manslaughter, and I am serving no prison time!! Yay!! I had also bought a very nice house there, and it has an arcade and a pool. And my son is doing good. He is happy, playing video games and watching the coolest tv shows. And I am also happy. I got baptized, and washed those sins away. While I will go to heaven, those men are burning all day, and all night while Satan dissect their bodies and lights their insides on fire. That’s all I want. My son to be alive, and for those dudes to suffer forever.