Advanced Essay #2: Curious George Pt. 2


In, Curious George Pt. 2, I really think I did well on this paper, as there were times writing this that I was just clueless on where I was going with it. With these complications, the essay ended up really strong, and I think overall a good essay. The one part I am not too sure of is how I spread the analysis throughout the paper. I am not sure if I did a well enough job on it.

Advanced Essay:

Almost every child goes through the phase of curiosity, and I was no different. At the age of 7, I wanted travel around the world with my best friend, Julie. Julie and I were inseparable,--physically and mentally--she was imaginary friend, even though she was a purple sprinkle. I sought advice from Julie everyday because she was always right, ever since she popped in my head a year before.This joyous time came to an end, when a fateful Saturday afternoon ruined our relationship.

“Mommy are we gonna get ice cream?” I questioned.

My mother swiftly turned around and gave my the death stare as if to say: ‘Don’t you dare ask me that question again’. My brain immediately registered the look and I slumped back into my car seat, staying silent.

We arrived at a place full of people. My mother, Julie, and I walked through a gate, leading to rows of golf clubs hanging, all different colors. My mother handed me one.

‘What is this, a bat?’

‘I don’t know maybe mommy wants us to play’

‘Play what?’

‘I don’t know Julie!’

‘Stop yelling at me! That’s not nice’

‘Alright, I am very sorry. I’ll ask mommy what it is’

My eyes trailed up to my mother, who was handing the man at the booth money. I tugged on her shirt. She ignored me, didn’t even bother to look down at me. I grabbed her shirt again, with a better grip, and pulled it again. She rotated. Her demeanor changed, and her face looked as though it was caving inwards, with her nose scrunched up.

My curiosity is just like building up a skill or habit, it’s something I was proud of, didn’t get ashamed or embarrassed by it. Although my mother constantly wondered why I was like this, it just came naturally to me, I couldn’t control it. It was like my brain needed to learn and understand what is going on, how everything works, and how to make sense of it all. Like Ta-Nehisi Coates said in the biography, Between the World and Me: “You are growing into consciousness, and my wish for you is that you feel no need to construct yourself to make other people comfortable.” Coates explains that people who use creativity or any other way that is different to interpret the world is inspiring, and nobody should make fun of it; instead let it be an example to aspire to.

We went through a lot of different golf courses, and I went skipping along with my club swinging around in circles. I was singing my favorite song: Leave Me Alone, by Michael Jackson. Right away, Julie started singing along.

‘So just leave me alone’

‘Leave me alone, leave me alone’

‘Leave me alone, stop it!’

‘Just stop doggin me around’

Our duet came to a stop, as the screech of my mother’s voice was heard. I stopped my music video and ran back towards her, realizing I sang my way past the pretty fountain. The fountain had a humongous gold golf ball on top, with four holes in the sides of the ball. In these holes, water poured out gracefully into a pool. Intrigued with the whole thing, my body moved towards the fountain on its own.

Next thing I knew I was standing right in front of the fountain, as I climbed up into the wall and looked over the rail and into the fountain water.

This gorgeous purple golf ball was staring directly at me.

‘You know you want it, just go get it’

‘No I can’t go in the water’

‘Then put ya hand in and get the ball’


‘Do it, you know we want it’

With an evil grin, I let curiosity take over me. I crawled under the rail and stood up. I stretched my arm out, to where the purple ball was, and wiggled my fingers to move closer. Without thinking, I leaned forward some more, way past my limit of balance. I fell head first into the fountain, making a huge commotion.

‘Julie, this is all your fault! We are not friends anymore.’

I grabbed my purple ball and got out of the fountain, and walked a couple of feet to where my mother was standing. She looked down at me and started laughing.

Many people people saw me as a bad little girl playing around, other than my mother. My curiosity lead me to a tool to learn and grow from my mistakes. Without curiosity, there would be nothing to try, therefore nothing to learn from in my life. Learning makes me intelligent, only a fool does not learn from his mistakes. My mother understood this about me, she knew my curiosity would get me in trouble.

“You did all of that to get a purple ball?” She said, with a puzzled look on her face.

I nodded my head and raised the ball to her face.

“You are so cute, let’s go get ice cream and sit in the sun.”

Even in The Giver, by Lois Lowry, everything is so plain and boring city and everyone has to follow the rules with no exceptions, but Jonas is different. When Jonas’s eyes are unusual, he is able to see color, when most people in the community cannot. He has an exceptional gift that allows him to see and interpret things different than everyone else; he is able to see “deeper” into the world that is around him, giving him the advantage of understanding and seeing life.

Jonas and I are just the same, the same glow in the eyes that say: extraordinary. We both are anxious about the world we live in, and we learn the exact same way.

Advanced Essay #2: Keeping thoughts

This essay is about exploring the ideas of speech and how it affects people in different ways living there everyday lives. People from different countries who come to the U.S are affected by the way that they speak and how seriously they are taken. 
James Klenk 
Mr. Block 
English 3 
December 10, 2017

When I was growing up I was a lonely kid with the little friend outside of school and not being friends with people in my neighborhood. I understood why I was going to a school far away from my house but I never got the concept of what that meant until I got older and started to experience the world more with the different culture and environment. I am dyslexic with slur speech and a high pitch voice annoying voice, I was weird to talk too. I went thru school not being self-conscious on how I talked but once I got to high school and started to meet new people I started to care about my voice and punctuation.

As my friends and I were talking about the class reading that we had to do for Mr. Kay's class. We were talking about the main character in the book and what we thought about her. As we walked, we were talking about the character choices in the book. I was telling them that I thought that the character actions were too impulsive to make any sense. As I told them that they gave me a look of confusion and giggles. I asked what happened. And all they said was what is the character name. ¨Why her name is Dane¨” everyone laughed with the laughter filling the halls ¨ẅhat did I say, that's her name¨. ¨Her name is Dana, You know that right¨ I looked at them thinking that they're crazy because I knew that I said. ¨You said Diane you know that right¨  as I looked at them I said ¨ Ya I guess¨. I went through that day not truly know what I said wrong but I know that the reason why they didn't fully understand me was that of my speech and dyslexia. The knowledge of know that your being affected by something that you can't change about yourself. I know that I am not the only one effect by a speech in their everyday lives. The short story Mother Tongue  It illustrates the struggle of a mother who is trying to live her everyday life with working, finances and raising a child, and dealing with the knowledge that she will not be fully understood and taken seriously because of her ability to speak English. “I knew from a four fact because when I was growing up, my mother’s ‘limited’ English limited my perception of her”(2). This ideal of speech impacts someone's ability of taken seriously is something that many people have to face in their everyday life with people with speech people are being less likely to be hired over other people. This practice can not only affect business body with them not hiring the best person for the job because they don't speak perfectly but instead picking people that might not be qualified and cause them to lose financially.

Cultures around the world have dictated their version of success in their society with people who ability took and speech a certain part leads them to be more successful in their society. Thru their eyes they cherry picking people that will be able to compete in the world to make them look more smart and intelligent.  The Idea of only picking people that looks and sound like the part cause them to overlook smarter and brighter people because they are different. This Practice not only limits the society as a whole by not putting their best foot forward in the areas of ideas, jobs, and knowledge. But it's also limit the society in another way. Its limit people experience and culture with them suppressing there difference and accents it fixes the average way people speak. As a society, we need to think and talk about if we want this to be the process of people being accepted into a job. If as a society we are comfortable with that we need to ask why. Why are we comfortable with allowing a part of our population that percentage numbers in the double-digit not being able to be heard or taken seriously.  That the real question that everyone should be asking themselves and that will people with claim different causes are more moral the ideals that anyone forms any background cannot listen be the cause of the way that they speak is something that we all need to acknowledge and do something about because for more people it´s unchangeable.

Advance Essay #2 - David Roberts

This is an essay about my love for literacy stems from my earlier love for books. Because of my exposure to books, I have learned to love literacy.

Literacy is a part of life that many people underestimate. When any form of literacy is left out of the curriculum, people forget it. It becomes something they no longer pay attention to, and when mentioned, its gets degraded into oblivion. But literacy is really something great. It does in fact play a huge part in our lives, and no matter what people say about, it will always be there. Whether literacy takes the form of social media, news, writing a paper, or other things, it will remain a major part of life. This is why we cannot forget it. And I, from experience, can say that books don’t give me the chance to forget literacy.

“Let’s go bud, time for bed,” my mom called to me.
I put down my pencil and ran up the stairs to get ready for bed. I always loved reading; it would make my imagination run wild. I didn’t know how yet to read, but with everyday I got a little bit closer to understanding.

“Alright son, tonight, we’re going to finish The Horse and His Boy.”

“Nice,” I replied. “Finally the ending!”

As soon as I was born, my parents were reading to me, or so I was told. My parents to me so often, that they still today tell me about all the books I read during my childhood. Granted, they have given a significant portion of those away, but there still exists a small collection of children’s books in the house. My parents say those are their favorites. has left me with a true love for reading and literature.I have learned to love all different kinds of books, whether that was a biography about some famous person, or a nonfiction novel about a kid’s experience growing up with no parents, or even a science fiction novel about life on another planet. I’ve learned to truly appreciate books

As I got older, and learned how to read, I would do it  constantly. I would read anything I could get my hands on, whether it was a nonfiction book, magazine, or even an essay online about something I was interested in. I think it is acceptable to say that there was never a time in my early childhood when I wasn’t currently reading something. Nowadays, this is no longer true, but I distinctly remember reading all the time, even if that meant re-reading a series once or even twice because I loved it so much. Sherman Alexie described my situation perfectly in her essay titled, The Joy of Reading and Writing, “I read books late into the night, until I could barely keep my eyes open.” She, like myself, remember reading whenever she could, even when she wasn’t supposed to be.

Jimmy Santiago Baca put how I felt about books into words in the film A Place to Stand. “I didn’t want to the guy to hit my eyes so I could read the story.” I was so deeply in love with reading that if something happened to me that rendered me unable to read, part of me would die. Reading was such a big part of my childhood, that if I didn’t have books, I don’t think I would be same person I am today. I would not have the same imagination, the same creativity that I have today. And those things are such a part of me that I would indeed be a different person.

Looking back on these things, I can easily see how books and literacy helped me grow. Reading helped me to understand and appreciate forms of writing from a very early age.. I’ve learned to value books and whatever wisdom they held within their two covers. I learned to see the meaning or reason why a certain part of a book was written. I can very easily read what is happening “between the lines,” as some people say. Reading gave me this ability, which I cherish with all my heart.

Now that I am closing on my seventeenth birthday, I still read every now and then, but I’m no longer that little kid that was obsessed with books. Other things occupy my time, and some days I don’t even touch a book. I still retain my love for books and literacy though. If I find a book I haven’t read I’ll be busy until I read the last word. I also can still look at things in life and appreciate the literacy held within it. I doubt anything could happen that would take away my love for books and literacy.

Advanced Essay #2- Autumn Lor

My essay revolves around phones and why I hate and love my phone. I'm biased about phones because of the experience but the story is identifying what a phone can do, off and on screen. 

Blinding by a Screen 
Learning about the world, you have to look at things multiple times to understand everything. I wish I could look at things once and just understand it all completely. Every day something new is created and every time us, humans feel the need to learn about it. We look at a device called phones as if we should a book. We create statues on social media as if we’re writing an article for the world to see and read. Jean M. Twenge wrote an article about how smartphones destroying this generation. She mentions, “The shift is stunning: 12th-graders in 2015 were going out less often than eighth-graders did as recently as 2009.” Surprisingly enough, when people do go out, they’re still on their phone.  
In 2013, I got my first phone where I could only call people. In 2014, I was able to text and in 2015, I got my first iPhone. It allowed me to talk, text, use wifi and so much more. Taking pictures to capture the moment and playing digital games to pass the time. I have a love/hate relationship with phones. There is one main reason why… 
Why is everyone walking so slow? I turn around and I see phones. They’re looking at their selfies and don’t know where they’re walking. “I don’t understand why you guys have to do this right now,” I say out loud, but no one hears me because no one is listening. I look straight forward again. There are two people standing in the parking lane, wearing big green coats with fur on their hood; they’re wearing matching coats while being on their phone. They both just look at the phone as I see the car that’s in front of them turn on his lights as if he was backing up. In that moment I screamed, “The car is backing up, get out!” Not one person moved. I watched the car back up and hit the guy as he pushes his friend. But the girls and I just kept walking as I watched and they were looking at their phones. I turn around, “Did none of you guys see that?” No response, “Hello, did you hear me? None of you saw that? Those people who just got hit by a car! How did you guys not see that? Did you guys even hear me scream?” They looked at and still didn’t know what I was talking about. 
Kara finials answer back, “See what? Those people aren’t my problem, they can get hit again and I’ll it watch this time,” Kara shouts.
“What do you mean?” Selena asks while still looking at her phone. She sounds concerned but the way she looked, it didn’t seem to add up. 
“What great friends you are. Always paying attention to me and actually caring for me. Don’t worry about those people because if that was you, I’ll just walk away and not say anything. I will watch you get hit by a car nothing will happen.” I rolled my eyes and just walked away. After taking some time away, I thought about the quote Lisa D. Delpit that says, “If you try to suggest that that’s not quite the way it is, they get defensive then you get defensive” (Delpit, 281). People get really defensive when they believe they are 100% correct. By defensive, I mean pushy and rude. They will say anything to make themselves right. I tried my best to see if they could change their minds but all I got in return was their attitude. 
We’re walking to the train station at 42nd and Market street but I walked faster than them so I got to the train first. When I got to the station, I didn’t look back so I didn’t know if they got on the same train as me but I know they didn’t get on the same cart as me. While being on the train I didn’t want to think about what happened, so I took out my phone and started to play a game called Bricks. By the time I looked up my score was 2098, my highest score, and I was two stops before I had to get off. The Market-Frankford Line takes so long that I never look up. 
After getting off the train I jumped on the bus. “Phone is low battery, 10%” my phone screen popped up. I put my phone in my pocket and slept. Half sleeping and half thinking, Why was it so hard for her to listen and look around? Maybe it’s because of the person she is, but I do that sometimes, I might not do anything but I would have thought about it. Knowing what happened means something can change if there is a next time. 
A few hours passed, Selena texts me, “Are you fine?” 
I responded with “fine,” but what I wanted to say was fine with what? I just hate the fact that I think too much about everything. It’s either that or people don’t think enough. I don’t know what to think anymore. I hate it so I exited the iMessage app and went on Instagram. 
Instagram makes me forget everything, being able to watch videos that are a minute long and watch another where my mind will completely switch. Instagram changes my thoughts in four seconds. Lisa D. Delpit brings out the point about “bitterness and resentment expressed by educators” (Delpit, 289). Although while she wrote it she meant something else but just reading that part, I see it as my educator being a distracting for me getting away from my bitterness and resentment. Instagram is my educator that reminds of my bitterness. 
While others may not feel the same way as I do towards the phone, I find phones more on the bad side of life. I could live without a phone. A phone is just one little device that provides ten thousand things together. I can call, text, locate yourself and others, capture pictures, record videos, and so much more. But phones are a distraction and it doesn’t allow people to connect with people face to face. Instead of talking to a person, you’re talking to a screen. Right now, you’re reading this off some type of electric device and my question for you is: are your eyes hurting yet? 

The Silenced Dialogue: Power and Pedagogy in Education Other People’s Children by Lisa D. Delpit 
Citation: Delpit, Lisa. “The Silenced Dialogue: Power and Pedagogy in Education Other People’s Children.” Harvard Educational Review, Aug 1988. Research Library pg 280 

Have Smartphones Destroyed a Generation? By Jean M. Twenge 
Citation: Twenge, Jean. “Have Smartphones Destroyed a Generation?” The Atlantic, Sep 2017.

Advanced Essay 2 - Educational Equality

This essay is about the importance of teachers who care about the futures of students and who's driving force is to propel kids far out into the world. The essay reflects of the fact that this isn't present in most of our country and for very specific groups of people. Hopefully this comes through in my work, and next time I hope to articulate even further with my points. I think I did a good job here but I want to hit the audience even more clearly next time. Enjoy!

Bea Gerber
Educational Equality

           I’ve never been ashamed to admit that I love math. Since elementary school, I remember correcting the mistakes on the whiteboard and turning in my worksheets early. Math has right answers, leaves nothing up to chance, and can always be solved, even if the solution is that there is no solution. I’ve taken geometry two times, two summer math courses, and have been taking math with seniors since sophomore year. This may come across as bragging about my smarts, but in reality, it’s me bragging about my opportunities. Freshman year, a few of my friends and I were ready to take our learning to the next level. Geometry had been a breeze for us and we wanted a challenge. Without hesitation, our math teachers and parents helped guide us through the process of taking a summer math course, and even gave us extensions to accommodate our exciting summers. I remember on the final day, clicking the last submit button and running down the stairs to my parents singing We Are the Champions by Queen. I was finding joy in my education on my own time and was accelerating my learning with the support of those around me who believed that I could be successful. The following year, our schedules were rearranged to fit our special math classes, and teachers constantly checked in with us to make sure we were able to keep up and stay afloat. We were encouraged by all who heard of our situation, and taking a harder math course felt a time to prove myself while being grateful for the chance to learn. 
This scenario is not typical, and I’ve realized this as my high school career has continued. While I was able to jump ahead easily and gain the support of others, many students across the country can not. At my school, being smart isn’t “nerdy”. Participating in class isn’t lame. We strive to be smart and push each other to our highest potential, something I now realize is not gifted to everyone. The author of I Just Want to be Average, Mike Rose, corroborates this while describing vocational school in LA: “If you're a working-class kid in the vocational track, the options you'll have to deal with this will be constrained in certain ways: you're defined by your school as "slow"; you're placed in a curriculum that isn't designed to liberate you but to occupy you, or, if you're lucky, train you, though the training is for work the society does not esteem.” I see the education system to be flawed because of this. The fact that one child is encouraged to achieve while another is seen as less than and not given the chance directly impacts education they can and will receive. This comes down to the school environments and the people who run them. If teachers believe that the end goal for students is to go to college as free thinkers who can make change and do more than stay in one neighborhood and live the lives their parents live, then those students have a chance at that life. If their teachers just believe in getting good test scores for their schools, the children they educate will reflect that. Jimmy Santiago Baca, the author of A Place to Stand, recalls, “I first got to talk to someone who made me feel human at the age of 22,” when speaking about how his relationships with people in and out of school during his lifetime. Our education system is too good at this. It is too good at looking at students as numbers and statistics rather than people with futures. Everyone, simply by attending school, should have earned the right to an education that actually wants to create a better person at the end of it. Currently, our education system only does that for certain people who fit a mold of a certain type of citizen. These are white middle class Americans, and that can be narrowed depending on your part of the country. If you don’t fit into that guideline, your education is streamlined into “what’s best for you” or how others feel you should learn. America is taught by white people. We learn whitewashed history and we read whitewashed books. We have special weeks or months where we take in literature written by people of color instead of that being the norm all year long. We learn through a white lens. This probably won’t change, since America feels comfortable here. What can change are the teachers and the motive behind the way they teach. A good teacher has the power to change a student’s life. Whether it be supporting children who want to jump ahead or the one time they learned their future actually mattered because there was someone looking out for them when the rest of the world wasn’t, a good teacher is life changing. Without good teachers pushing children, black children, forward, they fall victim to a system that is designed to ignore them. Designed to say “that’s enough.” Fully ready to assume children don’t want to achieve higher, therefore making the children believe they don’t want to achieve higher, perpetuating the cycle of being too cool to be smart. Continuing a circle that leads away from higher education and back into jails and prisons. The school system leaves behind children. Two kids can go to school for the same number of years and still have different different options and opportunities for their futures. Teachers have to teach to the students’ world and experiences, and not their own. Until teachers can meet children where they are, lift them up, and grow them as people, educational equality will not exist.

Media Fluency Remix Slide

Meida Fluency Tech Assignment
​After hearing the constructive criticism given by my classmates and teacher, I made a few crucial changes to my slide. I decided it be best to remove my name from the slide all together. I found that it was a distraction and it looked messy. I kept in mind that it's nice to have lines that guide the viewer to what's important on the slide but we also learned that rules are meant to be broken, so I placed an image with swirls. I think it represents the my personality so I found an image that would show that.
In the new slide, I edited the font and presented my quote differently as well. I felt it complimented the image. From what I saw in class,the shadow drop added a nice look so I added it knowing it would make the words stand out. It also made it easier to read rather than one color such as black or white that matched the background. Without it, it'd be either be too hard to see. 
I also kept in mind that it's easier to focus on the point of the slide when there aren't a lot of things covering the screen so I tried to keep it similar. Besides that I knew that if I did too much, it'd be a new slide rather than a remix. I had considered removing the quoter from the slide but if I did that then there'd be even more negative space then there already is. Once I had put these touches on, I realized it was a sharp, clean, slide. Overall, I feel these small changes helped professionalize my slide and increase my knowledge in design.

Remix 1 Google Slide

Remix 1 Slide
I learned a lot from the critique  that i was given. My first slide was very distracting, and the images that I put on there were also distracting and clashed with my background image. One of my friends pointed out to me that I did not have a color theme and that having a theme might help so that my slide is less distracting and conflicting. 

When i was thinking of doing my new slide, I wanted to make it a much more simple, but still with something important to me on there. I thought...what is  one of the most important things to me and I thought of my faith and my friends. So I chose a bible verse about friendship. I wanted to make the colors pop, so i bolded them and put them in white so that it would really pop off of the background. I put the bible verse in the top center because that is the focal point of my slide. That is the thing that I want people to look at and read first. 

The research that I did helped me to realize that I needed to make a simple slide. I needed to limit the colors that I used so that they did not clash and I had a solid theme. For my research, I used Presentation Zen. The main point that I noticed was "One Slide. One Point." I used this in the recreation of my slide because my first slide was very crowded. In conclusion, I think that the recreation of my one slide project is much better because of the research and the critique that I received from my classmates.  

Remix slide-Mawusse Akohouegnon

Untitled presentation (1)
​From the critique I got from my slide, I learned that when making my slide I should making things bigger. I was told that everything was fine I just had to make the heart bigger and play around with the words and see if that is the best place for it.
To remake my slide, I made my heart bigger then it was before so that it covered up more space. I also played around with the words and try to see if their was a better place of placing them but the way it is now is the only way that works.
In my research just told me the same thing that I found the first time. And I didn't really have to change much so it didn't requir for me to research  much. I just refured but to what I found before

Remix of All About Me Slide

Tech project (1)

I had learned a lot from the critiques I was given during the presentation. I had taken everything in consideration since I had certain things that could've been better. One of the critiques was to fix all the tangents on the slide. I had tried my best to fix. Another critique was to move the two images to the right over more so it didn't interfere with any of the text. I learned that if you want to catch someone's eye with a slide you have to make sure there isn't anything that will annoy or make them think what your slide is actually about.
I made these changes to my slide because I knew that it would make it better then it was before since it was our first time trying this out. The changes I made were to insure that everyone wasn't questioning why something was placed a certain way or that it was annoying them because of what ever reason they have. Also to make the slide as short as possible without it being way too much for people to look at. 
The research actually helped me a little bit because I had already an idea of how I wanted kmy slide. I wanted to make sure I should who I actually was an athlete. So while researching I was basically trying to find pictures that were simple enough but also popped. Some of the sources I used was the Zen website with the Ikea billboard. This actually gave me an idea to use colors that were bright and mixed well so someone would be able to see if from afar. Which in the long run actually was a success. This is my slide hope you enjoy.

Design Slides

Design slides (2)
1) Something I learned from my slide critic was that my original slide was much too stretched out, which was a big problem. I also learned that people prefered the same shape when it came to logos in the design. 

2) I changed almost everything in my slide except my main concept: a person with a message in the brain. But this time, I have a quote instead of pictures. I also use a colorful background to draw attention to the not-so-colorful person with the quote which is the most important part of the slide. 

3) A resource that helped me a lot was "Presentation Zen". The website talked about a lot of tools and ideas I could incorperate in my slide. I think the most important tool was the rules of contrast.

4) The main two websites I used to help me with my slide was "Presentation Zen" and "Slide Design"

Google Slide "Remix"

tech presentation mk. 2
So in my original side was very different from this one. It had four album covers instead of the one, placed throughout the slide. As my classmates told me, it would be better with less colors that heavily contrast each other so I took my favorite of the four albums -In the Aeroplane Over the Sea by Neutral Milk Hotel- that also had the softest colors and blew it up to be the background. I replaced my text that heavily contrasted the previously dark background with white text that doesn't grab your attention immediately. This was done because I wanted the viewer to first focus on the woman and boy so that the viewer's vision would then see the text when visually following their arms to give the illusion of flow and motion in the slide. The text itself was put in the position that it is in to fill in as much of that blank space as would look aesthetically best while still being aligned with the woman and boy's arms. What I most took into consideration for this slide was 1) Utilizing empty space 2) Creating a visual "flow" and something for the eyes to focus on and 3) Bleeding images off the slide. I have already talked about flow and empty space but, as one can see on the slide, both the woman and boy, the visual focus of the slide bleed off. There is also, appearingly, an object behind the woman that is bleeding off. Bleeding shows the depth of the image and is more pleasing and natural to look at than an image without depth.   

Tech slide remix

Tech slide (2)
The constructive criticism helped me make a better slide because people would tell me things I could improve on my slide.I changed my font to make it more appealing to the eyes.I also change my background picture because I found a better picture of the windmill with better lighting.I decided to remove my name from the Google slide because I felt it was not important to have my name on the slide.Another reason I removed my name from the slide was that it drew too much attention from my quote.

The From the presentation zen I learned a lot about making good slides.From the research that I did, I learned that having big text would help the text stand out so I decided to make the font bigger.I also learned that bolding the text makes it easier for the audience to see.I colored my text black because I wanted my text to contrast from the background.Presentation zen showed me a lot of ways to make a good slide.

In conclusion, I learned a lot about what makes a slide good. Using all of the sources I was able to create a good slide.I also found ways to improve on my old slide and make it better. I believe made a good slide but, I still could learn more things to improve my slide.

One Slide About Londyn:Remix

Tech_Me Slide-11%2F22%2F17 (1)

From the critique of my slide, I learned that since I am the creator, only I know what I want to grab the audience’s attention. I also learned that images get distorted sometimes when being shown on a projector in comparison to a computer screen so I should be careful when enlarging or minimizing images and text because it may make things be grainy or go unseen by the audience.

To remake this slide, I first remade a version that had my original background and text color but with more paint splatters as a border. I then decided to completely remix my slide so, I inverted the colors making the background black and the words white. It was suggested that, to catch the eye, I should make my name multicolored so, I did so. It was also suggested that I make my quote bigger so that the audience can read it since it was put on the slide for a reason.

I think the research helped me make a better slide because it showed that there are many different ways to interpret information and in order to convey the message you want, you have to catch the eye of the audience. I would also consider my classmates’ presentations research because I could see the things I liked about a slide and the things I didn’t like about a slide and I could see common mistakes that were present in my slide as well as theirs. For the most part, I used the given resources, google and advice from my friends to create a good slide. I used the ideas of eye catching colors, the rule of thirds and other advice from classmates/friends to formulate a new and improved idea for my slide remix.

Slide Remix: Nile Shareef-Trudeau

Media Fluency_ Nile Shareef-Trudeau (1)

At first my slide was just a word and design with a hidden meaning. You weren’t able to understand how it connected or expressed the essence of “Nile” without a thorough explanation from me. When critiquing my slide my classmates informed me that I could maybe add a definition of the word in my slide but it wasn't needed since I explained it.

I made the changes to my slide so that it could speak more so for itself. Although it still is simple, it looks a tad more special and I added the changes that were advised to me by my classmates plus a few extra changes that I thought would spice it up.Think these changes enace my slide greatly.

The research I did from all the source provided, really helped me to better understand the elements of a good slide design. I used space and the spacing of the different things to allow the presentation to look clear rather than cluttered. I used lines to draw the eye to the focal point of my presentation. The color I used changed to a slightly lighter purple than before, so that the text was still seen. Some shapes to go with my  “Special Person” theme, and a small shadow behind the focal point to make it bounce out and shine brighter than the rest. I think I made a lot of good changes to my slide and like it much better overall.

Nile Shareef-Trudeau


Tech Slide
Tech Slide

I didn't know what to do for my slide so I chose to do something different. I haven found my way yet so I chose to put a blank canvas because I still have my whole life ahead of me. My canvas is just waiting to be painted. The title is Pristine Justine because thatś how I view myself.

I didn't get a lot of critiques, I heard that there was weird empty spaces everywhere and   too many pictures. I decided to change the whole idea because I wanted it to reflect more on me and how I see myself. I did something simpler and decided not to do a picture because I wanted it to be new and just something I made and not just get it from the internet.  

I still use the video about the ikea sign because I used a bright color blue. I think the font color compliments the background. There's a perfect amount of empty space I don't know if my slide will be seen from 5k away like the Ikea sign, but I think i did a lot better on this side.  

google slide recreation.

​Here is my recreated slide. I learned from the critique of my slide to delete the picture because it draws attention to what the actual slide is about, I also learned that my slide to should make a point so that the viewers would understand it. The color of the background creates a neutral feeling. It is not too bright where you cannot see the words, but it is light enough to go good with the color of the words. 
I made some changes because from research I did it did not meet the guidelines of a good slide. I learned about having  variety in my slide. I made some words bigger than other. I also had balance in my slide because  the colors bounce off each other. I also learned to have symmetry in my slide and I applied that to my slide, in between the words. I also left some space. 
 A Source that I used are Elements of Design Define. I also used Presentation Zen and the Slide tutorial. I learned to base my slide off of how theirs looked. They taught me that I need to include balance, variety, and spaces. I looked at the appearances of the slide and the tips, and I made a better slide. 
riri (n.)sweeter than honey. (1)

Remix 1 Google Slide and Reflection

tech presentation quarter 2 (2)
When presenting my slide I got many critiques on how it was too busy and that the hot cheeto bag was distracting and unnecessary. Because of these comments I decided to get rid of the pictures all together. I felt as though the stranger things logo distracted you from my name, the hot cheetos popped out too much and the rose was unnecessary. I decided to instead use an eye popping but not too distracting image that represented stranger things as well. I chose to use a image representing stranger things as it is a thing I love. 

I used the idea of contrast and repetition that "Presentation Zen" explains. By having the black background with a slight pop of red in the background (my favorite color) it allowed my name to really stand out. I also used the idea to connect my name with the picture. By having the slight tint of red in the image it subconsciously connects the image to my name. I also used the idea of bleeding. By having the image of the mind flayer bleeding off the page it adds the effect of mystery, suspense and that the image is larger then it is. 

Some sources that I used when created my final work was Ms. Hull, My friends, and my parents. They helped me a lot by giving me constructive criticism, helping me with ideas and perfecting them. 

Slide Remix

All About Me (2)

From the critiques on my slide, I learned that color and font is a very important factor in design. Through color, we can catch people’s eyes, and changing the font up will make the slide less bland and boring. Furthermore, I removed my name from the slide because I wanted the viewer to focus more on the background picture, and not get distracted by my name being there. In addition, I changed the color, font, and placement of my slide because I learned that color plays a strong role in design and eye-catchers. Moreover, I used the clouds as a natural resource to put my quote on. By doing this, I allowed eyes to focus more on the quote and background, opposed to focusing on my name.

The research I did helped polish my slide because I used natural lines in the image to direct audiences’ eyes where I want them. In addition, I changed up the font to make a less bland slide, and color to catch eyes. I used presentation Zen, and other desgin websites to make my slide better. By studying how to make a good slide, I found a new interest in design and edit.

In conclusion, I enjoyed working on this project. It helped me learn a lot about design and where to place things. There is a lot of things I need to work on and this project has pointed that out. Some things I could have worked on are choosing a better font, and using better color.

My new slide

Emma's slide
Emma's slide
From the criticism I received, I learned that my slide was too buisy. The background of my slide was too stretched, and the quote was spread out everywhere. The number 10 on the soccer player's sleeve was too close to the quote and seemed irrelevant in my slide. The font of my quote did not pop and the contrast of the quote on the silhouette was too distracting.
I made my new slide more simple. I changed my quote to something that described me in fewer words. I placed my new quote underneath the soccer player. The dividing line in my new background is pleasing to the viewers. I lined up the beginning of my quote to the soccer players cleats and the end of the quote to the goalpost. I chose white as the color of the font to contrast with the green. I used Architect's daughter as my font because it makes it appear like the soccer player wrote it.
I modeled my slide after Presentation Zen. I used the rule of thirds, the soccer player's legs, the soccer ball, and my quote. The soccer player also bleeds off of the page making the slide look as though there is more to the slide. There is a lot of negative space which gives my slide a nice touch. In conclusion, I took the criticism I was given and executed a better slide.

Indiya Remix Slide

During the last past few weeks, I've learned how to make an okay slide. My first slide was a complete fail. I didn't like anything after I'd seen my classmates slides. Theirs had nice quote not too short or for long. I also got told that my picture looked "like a decapitated gymnast" and it was also pixelated. I then realized that my slide was not as great as I thought it was so then I had to decide to just re-do the inter thing.
I decide to change my whole slide because I wasn't feeling the vibes of the slide with the " decapitated gymnast". So I searched up dance on Pinterest, Google, etc. I finally found a picture that I liked. I then searched again on Pinterest, Google, etc. I had trouble picking between two quotes but the picture I'd use had to do with feet so I then choose the saying "Dance with your heart your feet will follow". I then made the words follow the sunsets curve because it looks ascetically pleasing.
The research that I did really did help me create this slide because I found that bleeding doesn't work for every picture. In my old slide, it looked like a "decapitated gymnast" Those weren't the vibes I was looking for so when I heard this I knew I had made the mistake of bleeding. I also found that the way the text is formed and follows the picture it looks really nice. I found out many things while doing this project and I hope that I will create better slides later on.
tech prestation (1)

Final Slide-Islam

1 Slide Project (3)

     The criticism I got from my classmates for my slide didn’t impact me as much as the criticism Ms. Hull gave me. I didn’t want to continue on with the theme I had but I did it anyways. My slide was a very spread out collage that I had no confidence in presenting in front of the class. Ms. Hull told me that if I wanted to make a collage then go for it. I had to get rid of the white spaces and “make people look at everything at once”. Those are exactly the changes I made.

     I stuck to the composition video on youtube that explained how pictures should intersect at the four intersecting points and the slide tutorial video that explained how important pictures are in a presentation as my sources. There is a numerous amount of different pictures explaining different things that all tie to one main topic.

     My slide may or may not have improved but this time I have a little bit more confidence in myself. I learned that slide making takes time and effort and the smallest things are actually a big deal. From the videos and websites I gained much knowledge on how to make my slide better in the future. I thank these videos and the people behind the voice overs, but most importantly, Ms.Hull.

Single Slide part II


After the first slide that I did, I thought the project was okay just like how my slide was just okay. It wasn’t anything special but it worked for what the project was asking for. This is why it took a little while to even start the revised version. I didn’t have much interest to do the first slide. Yes I looked at some of the websites that suggested strategies for design but knowing how to make the slide look decent didn’t really help me choose an image, a topic, something to go off of. So there was no real motivation. Although I did still have to do something so I put a slide together very last minute and that was that. Like I said I thought the slide was okay seeing as I didn't put much effort into it but, when it was time for me to present to the class about how I designed my slide I didn’t really know what to say.

The feedback I got from the presentation was definitely helpful and in general it sounded to me like I should take my own picture for the slide instead of looking one up. Now I understood where that was coming from and I also thought a picture of my own would be better but I don’t have a super amazing camera so that didn't really work out. But I did indeed make my own picture in a way. Now if the comment on my slide wasn’t “take your own picture” it was “it’s too blurry at the bottom”... both things I couldn't really change. So I decided to start over completely. I stayed with the soccer theme though so I wasn’t completely lost or anything, just had a blank slide.

For some reason starting the new slide was much easier than the first one (that is when I actually decided to start.) In place of the soccer ball on the field by itself I tried to find a picture of player I liked on the ball or just holding one. After stretching a couple of photos to try and fit in the background of a slide I decided to try something different. I got a picture of the player I wanted and this time it wasn’t the whole background of the slide but only an image in there. I threw a couple more in the slide to try and add more flavor but that wasn't working either. The idea was really good but it just looked ugly with a bunch of rectangular images in there with no good way to fit them together. At this point I decided to devote myself to a good looking slide. I thought well the players would look fine but just without the stupid backgrounds. So I found a free photo editing site and fiddled around with the images till I found a good brightness and whatnot. It was pretty much all downhill after that, I figured I could keep two uniform colors present then make the text that color as well. Overall I was happy with the outcome and enjoyed the project.

Single Slide Remix

Untitled presentation (1)

Originally I was going for the the Ikea look, like focusing it on one thing. To me, it made sense at first but then explaining it to people I can could see why it was so many of my teammates were confused.  My and teammates think my topic was clear.  Somethings that my teammates told me to improve ways to make sure my topic was more clear.  Also to not have as many pictures because at first look they didn't make sense.  My pictures were also srinked and weren't pleasing to the eye.

After taking in all my critiques and applying them to my slide i decided to improve it by just having ONE picture and basing it on my topic(languages).  I also changed my background to blue because it’s like the sky in my picture and also when asking people what’s their favorite color many siad blue so I thought it would be appealing to the eye.  My front color is yellow because I think yellow is a color that pops to the eye.  Also since my background is the sky, the yellow front goes well with the sun my my picture.  Now I think my slide is more understanding and well done.

After all us this I really appreciate the speech Ms. Hull gave us because it made me feel a lot better knowing that none of us got the project done right and that we are supposed to learn from our mistake, so I want to thank Ms. Hull for that because not only do I feel more confident in Tech I feel better in my other classes.

My Family- Tech

   My slide at first to me was the quintessential example of what a slide should not look like. The pictures were unorganized the angles were not symmetrical it just needed a whole revamp. I decided to re do the slide in a more home type style which is why there are frames on the walls. I now knew what I needed to fix to make my slide better. Reading this you will see the time and effort I put into my slide.

   Doing research I found that the style of your words along with the background help make a slide a slide. So when picking a color background for my letters I wanted it to resemble the modern family style cursive words with a black or white background. So that is what I incorporated into my slide. Going into this I knew I could make my slide much better than it was previously and that is what I believe I did. Moving on I will now show some of my sources.

    Some sources I used to make my slide was the presentation zen link which is basically a website that explains how to make a slide and things that make a good slide. In conclusion my slide was originally how can I say this a mess, but after hearing my fellow peers and Ms.Hull I think I was better equipped to tackle the challenge of revamping my slide. Thanks for reading!